Summer 2019 Vibes!!!

I know I haven’t posted much this summer… I guess I’ve just been busy…

LIVIN MY BEST LIFE! 😉

As this Summer officially comes to an end for me, (I start work back up tomorrow!) it has dawned on me that this Summer has been pretty great. Which is not always the case for me. No, I wasn’t able to go on some luxurious vacation, but I was able to have some really fun times with great family, friends, food, and lots of wine! 😉 I got to do more than I usually get to, because this summer I decided to take off of work. Granted, my job is different then most, I can either apply to work the summer or not, it’s my choice. Normally I work every Summer, but something made me decline this Summer. And I’m glad I did. My credit card isn’t happy, but I think it was the right move for me personally. 

No my Summer wasn’t perfect, it actually started off really difficult for me and my family. And I have had many emotional moments and hard times, but when I look at all the good. Somehow, that wins. Good always wins. And so, I thought before I jump back into my usual work routine, I should just take a second and reflect of the Summer memories I was blessed with. 

JUNE, JULY, & AUGUST 2019

My Summer started with my usual tradition of taking my mom to see a broadway show. I get her tickets for her Mother’s Day gift and then we usually see the show in June. This year we saw Waitress, and it was ABSOLUTELY amazing. [Fun Fact: I actually just watched the movie and it was good, but I LOVED the play even more!)]

4th of July we celebrated with some family and it was really sweltering hot, but it was a really great time.  As an anxious person, heat really tends to effect me. But I’ve really learned to manage my anxiety in the Summer better. The 4th was really fun! Especially since my cousin and his family were in from Florida. It was really nice to be able to spend a holiday with them, it’s been a minute! I also found this super simple COOKIE RECIPE, and they were a hit! I think I made them, like 3 times for 3 separate occasions this summer, I just switch up the sprinkles depending on the occasion. A kid favorite for sure! *You could totally make these for Fall, Halloween, Christmas, Easter, etc. I would even like to try it with chocolate cake mix. BTW if you look closely, you may spy that I wore a Britney Spears t-shirt…it was the only red, white, & blue I had. And like I was cool with it! 😉 #ITSBRITNEYBITCH Guess you can tell, I’m kind of a graphic tee fan…more to come on that later on!

A Stranger Things themed Coney Island! So if you are a fan of the sci fi/mystery Netflix show, you would know that this Summer Season 3 was released. [I’M ONLY UP TO EPISODE 6…SHHHHH!!!!] Coney Island was transformed into a Stranger Things theme park in the show’s 80’s fashion. It consisted of just posters hung around of the logo and the characters, the theme song was placing on the speakers, and the staff had on custom tees. Nothing crazy, I was kind of disappointed. BUT I went with my mom, aunt and my aunt surprised us by bringing my goddaughter, so we got to go on some rides, play games, and eat some food court summer food. 

Local Baseball Game for my Cousin’s husband’s 40th birthday! I’m not a super fan of baseball, but we had a box room, and there was catered food, and the weather was great. The kids even got to run the bases after the game. 

   I got to catch up with my coworkers…and eat this load of calories! 😛

NIA fam

Atlantic City Overnighter with my fav ladies, my mom and my aunt! We stopped in the small town Smithville on the way. Gambling isn’t my fav, because I HATE losing money. But there were a few fun games I liked, like CRAZY MONEY! BUT I got some sweet Gilmore Girls/Stars Hollow vibes from the small, quaint town, and picked up some goodies.

[INSERT MINI SMITHVILLE HAUL-SLIDESHOW BELOW]

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Two small jars of honey, peanut butter, a candle, a jar of jam, worry dolls, a tie dye t-shirt [this was from one of the boardwalk shops in AC], and a wine opener in the shape of a wine bottle with my name on it and a cute saying-my Aunt bought me as a gift!

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TOY STORY 4! THE LION KING! ALADDIN! #RELIVEDMYCHILDHOOD Thank you!

So I never had a super strong connection to The Lion King or Aladdin as a kid. I was never a super big Disney kid, I had my favorites but they weren’t it. But I really had to see the new live action films. Because, duh? However, Toy Story was a thing! My brother and I were a fan of the films growing up.

I really enjoyed all three films.

[INSERT MINI MOVIE REVIEWS!]

The Lion King was a little bittersweet because I felt like Nala being played by Beyoncé kept taking me out of the story, because I was just thinking ok you’re Beyoncé. And I just felt annoyed by it. And I just felt like the real animals (although Timon and Pumbaa were HYSTERICAL) were just weird to watch in this sing along world. I felt like the color in the animation helped with suspending reality and enjoying the world. But I did enjoy it for the most part, the original is better, in my opinion. The music was better in the original too. 

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My friend and I in the theater with our cherry cokes and our granny glasses. 

Aladdin was amazing! I loved the romance between Aladdin and Jasmine. You know me, if there’s a love story, I AM IN IT! I thought Jasmine’s vocals were INSANE. And Will Smith as the genie….I mean he cracked me up the whole damn time. The music was beautiful…And I watched a crappy boot leg copy because by the time, I got around to watching it, it wasn’t playing in theaters near me. But I really loved it, and if I watched it in a clear, crisp copy, I’d probably love it even more.

Toy Story 4 was EPIC! It was everything-emotional, funny, nostalgic, scary….like those dummy dolls were legit! It was amazing and I actually didn’t think the ending was as sad as everyone made it. I think it actually left room for other films.  

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Had to see Toy Story 4 with my big bro, cuz… childhood. #Nostalgia Peep the shirts! #PIZZAPLANET

Pool/Beach Vibes

So I actually got to go to the beach TWICE this Summer, which is kind of a big deal for me. There have been some Summers I wouldn’t get to go at all! I went once with my mom to a local beach, then I went to Ocean City with some family, and stayed with them in a rented house for a few days. I also got to have some fun pool days, one with my best friend at her house and one with some family, my cousin has a pool membership. I kid you not it was very Stranger Things-80’s pool vibes. Super fun! 

[INSERT MINI OCEAN CITY HAUL]

We were only there for 5 days, but we did so much! The beach, the amusement park, the water park, the arcade, BBQ nights in, shopping strips, dinner night outs, we played cards and other games, mini golf AND survived the crazy heat wave too! 😉 

Goodies ocean city

Clearly you see I was vibing with the Tie Dye trend! I’ve always liked it, but now I actually own it! I bought two t-shirts, an ankle bracelet, a cross necklace, a candle, and Spice Girls wine glass charms. I mean I just thought they were hysterically awesome!

I bought my family tickets to see Ain’t Too Proud! It was my dad’s father’s day gift this year! And the talent was incredible! I honestly was so amazed by their vocals. I grew up with the music of The Temptations playing in my house. I’m definitely a MOTOWN influenced kid. I love their music, songs like My Girl and Just My Imagination were some of my favs! The show was so amazing, I felt like I was seeing them live in concert.

Descendants 3 Premiere with my God Daughter!

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My cousin threw a party for her daughter & her friends, and so I made some fun treats for the girlies. Besides, I was kind of excited for the 3rd film too! I was a bit obsessed with Evie’s blue and red vibes from the second film. The second is my favorite, but I enjoyed the new film too!

Descendants premiere party

I love planning themed parties, and believe me I have a few TV related mini parties I had throughout this summer, but I’m going to do a whole separate post on my Summer TV and Music Favs! So STAY TUNED!

Fun with Fashion!!!

I got to play around a little more with fashion this summer. More than I usually do, because I didn’t have to dress a certain way for work. Also, I became a huge fan of hats and tassel earrings. Also the two white t-shirts with the logos on them are both shirts made by my brother. The “she writes her own story” tee was a custom made for me, but the “You’re Making Me Blush” tee is available on his etsy shop! He has some great designs up, please take a look and follow him on instagram @mytshirtaddiction 

I told you I love graphic tees, I guess it runs in the family! 😉 

I just got a fresh new cut and color because my hair was kind of looking rough from dying it purple in April. I basically had Mermaid hair all Summer. Which was like cool, but I was growing sick of it and I needed a darker vibe for Fall! I’ve had Pink, Blue, and Purple hair over the years and I still have yet to show any of that on this blog! One of these days, I’m going to do a whole Hair Chronicles! LOL. 

Had My God Daughter over for a sleepover- and we did everything under the sun from making tie dye tees to baking a cake for my brother’s birthday to making our own chipwiches- I also created a scavenger hunt for her! We also had my brother and his family stay over unexpectedly one night, and it was my niece’s first sleepover at our house. So I had to scramble and make it festive for her and get her some goodies. We decorate every time we have my god daughter for sleepovers so we had to do the same for my niece too! I also babysat my niece by myself for the first time! (It’s not like I can’t… I just never have until this summer, I can be a nervous Nancy when it comes to watching kids all by myself. LOL) Great times with my two favorite little girlies!!!!

 

Music & TV Vibes!

So I do want to share with you all the shows and music I fell in love with this Summer in a separate post, but I just wanted to highlight a few things! I saw Shawn Mendes in concert with my friend and needless to say it was kind of an anxious experience. I will get more into it in a separate post. But let’s just say I will never sit in Barclay’s upper seating again. It’s quite terrifying! Shawn however, was AMAZING! And it ended up being a fun night. Taylor Swift dropped her new album #Lover as you may have guessed from my last few posts, I’m KIND OF a fan! It’s EPIC and I love it! So there has been lots of fun Taylor Swift memories this Summer. As for tv, there were so many shows I saw premiere, shows end and all the feels in between. But the two that I hold so dear to my heart has to be the new 90210 reboot- BH 90210. SO GOOD! And the announcement of the Lizzie McGuire reboot! I AM DYING!!!! SO SO PUMPED for that! I’m already planning my premiere party in my head guys! Nostalgia is a dish best served nice and toasty. Childhood memories….feels like home. 

Family Day at the Aquarium! We got caught in torrential down pour, but it was still a good time! 

Speaking of rain, I think I got caught in crazy down pours and thundering and lightning like 4-5 times this summer. I’ve been soaked from head to toe on multiple occasions. One time my umbrella wouldn’t even open! Some days I could laugh it off and some I just wanted to stop and cry! But looking back at this summer I can just say Thank You! Thank You 2019 for getting me through some really hard emotional blocks, and testing me and proving to me that I can handle so much more than I give myself credit for. Anxiety does not define me. And just because I feel the weight of the world one day or even a week doesn’t mean that it’s forever. That my funky moods, don’t have to be my all day moods! I’m so hoping to bring that knowledge with me into this new Fall Season…MY FAVORITE SEASON! Such a basic bi*ch, I know! #FIGHTME. 😉 BRING ON THE PUMPKIN EVERYTHANG, the flannel, the leather, the cool air, the crisp leaves and the HOLIDAYS! I feel so blessed to have had the Summer I did. And blessed to start this new fall year, that is already filling up with some exciting things!

Time to focus on the positive. 

 

How was your Summer?

*All images are my own, except the movie posters, the Taylor Swift image I stole from my bestie, and the Lizzie McGuire pic I reposted from Hilary’s instagram.* 😉

 

-<3-

 

 

Tori Kelly Concert Review & Outfit

I know it’s been a minute, and I’m not going to bore you with excuses. Who knows, how many people out there are even out there reading this. Lol. But for those who are, no matter how long I may be MIA for, know, I always come back! 😀

Back in April I got to check another artist off my concert list, when I saw Tori Kelly live.

TK Acoustic Sessions

Set List:

(To the best of my recollection)

Language

Nobody Love

Coffee

Never Alone

Pretty Fades

Actress

I Was Made For Loving You

Take Back Home Girl

Two Places

Keep on Singing My Song (Christina Aguilera cover)

Only Exception (Paramore cover)

Bring Me Home

Thinkin’ Bout You

Suit & Tie (Justin Timberlake cover)

^It’s like she knew I was coming^

Confetti

All In My Head

Paper Hearts

Dear No One

Unbreakable Smile

Kid I Used to Know

Hollow

Your Words

Psalm 42

Sorry Would Go a Long Way

Funny

Should’ve Been Us

Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing

Change Your Mind

* Her guitarist- Mateus Asato was INSANE. His solo was out of this world. And at one point she and her guitarist had this like voice/guitar off. Tori would sing and Mateus would match it with his guitar cords. And then they switched and Mateus would play his guitar and Tori would have to match it with her vocals. INSANITY! Such an amazing duo.

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The Tori Kelly Acoustic Sessions concert was held at a theater so it was a very intimate setting. Our seats were great and the price was so reasonable. Tori took the stage with just her acoustic guitar and her voice, with the help of another electric guitarist. The stage held only a few lamps, and a couch, while the back drop was ruffled theater curtains, the lighting changed coloring with each song.

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It was so incredibly simple, but amazingly profound. Her talent is extraordinary and she is such a sweet soul. As she performed a mashup of old, new, some covers and unreleased music, she also walked us through the story of her journey with music. There was even a moment where she was singing a new unreleased song, about her grandfather (I believe it was “Your Words”) and it was so silent in that theater, you could hear a pin drop. I had goosebumps on and off throughout that whole night! I love when artists chat with you, it just makes you feel like they are your best friend chatting with you in their living room.

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What an insane talent. It was an incredible show. She is even more incredible live. I am thrilled to be able to check her off my dream concert list. I can’t wait to see her again. Now I have a friend who I made a fan, who I will certainly be taking with me to future shows! I know Tori just wrapped this tour a little bit ago, but with all the unreleased music she was playing, I imagine she’s going to be releasing more, and who knows maybe she will be touring again sometime soon. Catch her whenever you can!

 

***

My Tori Kelly Inspired Look

Leather Jacket

Flannel Shirt

Glitter T-shirt

Black highwaisted skinny jeans

Black booties

Big Curly  hair (cuz Tori Kelly vibes!)

Black nail polish

Hoop earrings

Some fun rings

Cuff bracelet

Medallion Necklace

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I was inspired by Tori’s earlier fashion style. It seems she’s experimenting with more high fashion pieces, sporting more heeled boots and suit ensembles. She’s amazing either way!

 

Visit ToriKellyMusic.com for more information!

*All images are my own.*

(except the Tori Kelly concert poster)

-<3-

 

Video Update

There are often so many areas of life we feel we need to be good at all the time. And often times we struggle trying to make that happen. It’s impossible. You can do anything but not everything. You can be anything, but you can’t be everything, to everyone, all the time. If you try to, you will break.

As the summer comes to an end, the self-bashing comes for not doing half of the things I wanted to. Summer is kind of like New Year’s Eve in that way, don’t you think? We make so many promises to ourselves and then life happens.

I’ve been really thinking about my relationship with video and film making. And because of this, I’ve learned a few things. I wanted to get really real with myself about this topic.
To back track just a bit, I have a Bachelor of Arts degree. I studied Mass Communications with a concentration in Film and Broadcasting. The dream-the goal- to write for television. And yet when I look at all the video projects I’ve actually finished…the total number is not many. Many unfinished scripts/ideas for scripts collecting dust too!

Back in college, I had to do a few projects- one was a music video which I did for The Civil War’s Poison & Wine and the other was a concept video which was about throwing away stereotypes- it was very abstract and I titled it “Tearing Down The Label Makers.” It’s crazy because I feel like the message holds even more relevance today. Then I worked on my thesis which as you may know was a documentary about a day/or days in the life of my Grandmother who had been struggling with Alzheimer’s disease. I did two versions of that for two separate classes- one was the full version, and one was an abridged trailer version entitled Vai Com Deus.

“Poison & Wine” Video Shoot-

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“Tearing Down The Label Makers” Video Shoot-

Tearing Down the Label Makers

Neither the music video nor the concept video have been uploaded to YouTube, although considering these two were my very first video projects I am still very proud of how they came out and the messages behind them. I’m seriously considering sharing them. Providing the actors give their permission for me to do so, actually I’m pretty sure I had them all sign release forms!

During my college years I also attempted to shoot a script I wrote called Dumb Luck. A lot of time and production went into that but, it never got finished and the footage has been difficult to revive since my college computer died on me and I’ve gotten a new one. I am hoping to revive that and get that up, it’s super raw,  and you can definitely tell I was just starting out but the story is juicy. We only got to shoot the montage sequence. But a few years ago I shared the script, if you’d like to read that…click HERE.

“Dumb Luck” Prop Pictures

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“Vai Com Deus” process-

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Since I graduated I’ve done a few little side projects that are actually finished- I shot a yoga video for my cousin, a poetry video for MLW- to name a few and a couple of vlogs. The vlogs are less planned and less cinematic of course.

Yoga Video Shoot (Behind the Scenes) (this is not available to watch,  even though she was happy with the result-the video was for a school assignment and my cousin didn’t want it uploaded.)

“Secret” Society Video Shoot/Vlogs (Behind the Scenes)

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hGN4CPY4vI

Then there are more video attempts- there are bits of footage shot for a zombie horror short that my brother and I had been working on. We even got as far as building a timeline of the clips in editing, but then…life. Life came in, things got busy, I got distracted and something else needed my attention.

“Inhumane” process- (Behind the Scenes)

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Its 4 years now since I graduated and it seems that every time I get close to the idea of shooting something- I may do well for a brief time but then cue the rut.

The other day I was going through some old paperwork and things, trying to organize my room and I came across some old scripts and video treatments/storyboards. Both were horror related. One was the zombie short titled Inhumane, the other titled Head Over Heels (which I think would be a bad ass Halloween upload). And when I see these scripts and how the planning process was beginning it makes me want to get back into video. But then I hit a wall and the reality sinks in. There’s just no realistic way. For the past-I want to say 2 years- I have been well involved/invested in the engagements, weddings, bridal/baby showers of many people that are very close to me. And I have had to really dedicate my time and my funds to them. When I think about doing something short/simple- I think how I don’t have the actors, or the equipment, to do so.

I know I’ve mentioned this before, my brother is a photographer and he has a lot of equipment that I’ve used in the past. But I’m very weird about using it, mostly because he’s very particular about it, lol. And I get nervous I’ll do something wrong! And so because of that I am very weird about asking him for help. I feel like it’s a burden, especially now that he is newly married and he and his wife are expecting their first child. Even though he has been hounding me to get back into shooting Inhumane, I know he simply doesn’t have the time, we don’t have the people, and quite honestly there are just so many other things I’d love to shoot instead. #HeadOverHeels #MysteriousAttractionTeaser

I also don’t have the best sound equipment or the best editing software either so it’s kind of like a million things weighing against me. I think about how people would perceive the work I put out. “Didn’t she go to school for film and video? This sucks!” That’s how I feel they would judge it. Along with all the other worries, I fear I may not be good enough at it.

I know this may seem like I’m complaining and I’m not. I don’t want pity. I understand that life is fast paced and ever changing. I love being asked to be part of special moments in people’s lives. People who mean the world to me. But sometimes when everything seems to happen all at once it can be very overwhelming. And we all know that I can get overwhelmed pretty easily and my anxiety definitely tends to spike a lot more when too much change is happening.

I just think that in life you often have to prioritize and these things in my life have been coming one after the other and they need special attention. I’m the type of person who really wants to show up for you on your special day/during your special time. My relationships with my family and friends are everything to me. And so I give 150% every time. (Or at least I really try too!)

With my bank accountant taking some serious hits over the past few years, lol-so has my time management skills. I can multi task…sure…just ask my computer- I can have 8 different tabs open at once and hit all of them. But I can’t say with absolute confidence that I can multi task well all the time. I just end up overwhelming myself and needing to narrow things down. Focus on one thing at a time. Rightfully so…no? I mean how much wedding/baby events/day to day responsibilities can one girl take at once? Ya know? It’s a lot. But thankfully, thank god it’s mostly beautiful, happy stuff, all deserving of celebration. I will always be grateful for that.

Needless to say I know there are ways around this funk I’ve created for myself. I know that fear of inadequacy, lack of funds and time are a huge part of why video has taken a back seat. But I want to try and make some solutions to these problems.

Dear Michelle,

ACTORS ask people I know/ research sites that can help find actors willing to participate for low funds or pizza! Haha. Asking people you know, can be difficult, it doesn’t always work out. My film and video professor used to always tell us to have a plan B because people aren’t always reliable and it can break your heart when a project falls through the cracks. This I know first hand. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked family or friends to be apart of shorts and they cancelled on me because of work or life in general got in the way. It happens, I get it. But creatively, it’s heart breaking. Another thing to consider when filming is to keep the shorts abstract- quick cuts- simple images-

Avant Garde it- experimental film, experimental cinema- a mode of filmmaking that rigorously re-evaluates cinematic conventions and explores non-narrative forms and alternatives to traditional narratives or methods of working.

TIME make time- plain and simple. Plan it out, and stick to a schedule.

SPACE/LOCATION keep it local, go where you know- use people’s homes, lol.

FUNDS keep things simple/super low budget- use house hold items.

EQUIPMENT use equipment you have, or ask to borrow equipment in advance.

EDITING SOFTWARE use what you have and make it work.

FEAR“Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game.” -A Cinderella Story. Your never going to not be fearful of new challenges. You just have to decide how bad you want it, and be brave enough to just do it, to hell with what people think! 

When you’re just starting out, or easing back into something Don’t Expect Perfection! If things are a little janky, it’s ok, it’s better to shoot footage than not try at all. And Vlogs do count. I’ve noticed I like vlogging when I have some cool things to do, I just have to get better at the editing turn around. Mini Vlogmas is still only partially edited. :/ As is the Gender Reveal Party Vlog for my brother and sister in law and a Family Trip Vlog to Great Wolf Lodge we took last Summer. I also shot a bunch of footage of a Polar Express Trip and my best friend’s engagement night. Really got to get back to editing!!!!

*Current Update– Since I last scheduled this post (which was a while ago back in the Summer when I was what I like to call bulk blogging) I have edited my butt off and have finished editing Vlogmas, The Gender Reveal, The Great Wolf Lodge Trip and The Engagement. I however am torn as to whether or not I should post them on YouTube/link them on this blog. I know have alluded to the fact that I would post them, I’ve mentioned it in many blog posts [including the Vlogmas announcement], however I am not the only person in them and I don’t know if others would appreciate their images being out on the internet. I know- why announce Vlogmas, take forever to edit them, and then never post them. The truth is I did do a small Vlogmas, and I did edit them, but I don’t feel 100% comfortable sharing videos of my family. I may just keep them as home movies for me, and my friends and family. But I am excited that I got so many of them done. That’s a win for me!

When things start to settle down on the wedding/baby front, I will start to save up for some new equipment. In the mean time, I just have to do it. Pick up the camera I do have and shoot something. Stop worrying about how crappy it might turn out and just dive in. I know I’ll feel better once I do. And the excitement and natural high of doing something I love will come back. I just need to do and stop second guessing, stop making excuses and just use the time I do have for myself wisely.

The reason for this long winded post is because I needed it. Sometimes you need to reflect on all the ways you let life pass you by in order to make you realize that you need to try a little harder to make your dreams come true. Be a bulldozer – and plow through the writer’s block, through the lack of inspiration, through the Summer Blues, through the funk that I’ve been in, and just go for it!

So here’s hoping to change my mind set! Wish me luck. No Scratch that- Wish me determination!

 

*All images and videos are my own.*

-<3-