A Letter of Heartbreak from Adele

Sometimes I do this thing…Read and see if you can figure it out! 😉

adeleshell image





Hello, it’s me. 

I miss you. I’ve been sitting in my Hometown Glory, Chasing Pavements trying to Make You Feel My Love.

Don’t You Remember? When We Were Young. How you were always my One And Only, My Remedy.

It feels like a Million Years Ago,  it saddens me you see.

Once upon a time, I Found a Boy one that would last, in love, a First Love, a gentleman.

If It Hadn’t Been For Love, I would have never been Hiding My Heart from you. Worried and scared to feel pain. I’d whisper to myself, He Won’t Go, he’d never leave. It’s okay.

Maybe I’m a Daydreamer. Maybe I’m Tired of feeling Crazy for You.

Rumour Has It, you’ve begun Turning Tables. All I Ask is that you keep an open mind, and consider the possibilities. Our love ain’t Water Under the Bridge, hold me like I’m more than just a friend.

Take It All, my Sweetest Devotion.

If it seems like something you cannot do, if you’re gonna let me down, let me down gently. I hope you have your memories.

Set Fire To The Rain watch it pour as I touch your face.

Give me a memory I can use.

To remind you of how I can no longer keep our Love in the Dark.

There is so much space between us.

But I’ll Be Waiting here patiently, singing you my Love Song.

We could have had it all, this I know.

But here I am, Rolling In The Deep upon the River Lea, I blame it on the River Lea.

All the memories.

I’ve saved the Best for Last to explain the Cold Shoulder, I’ve shown you in the past. I’ll share with you the worries the fears that turned into tears. The reasons that Melt My Heart to Stone.

My Same, my love, I wish to make things Right as Rain.

But we can’t go back, or so it seems. I pray for Someone Like You to walk into my world again, I bid you farewell with a kiss on the cheek.

As I courageously whisper Send My Love (To Your New Lover). Treat her better.

Love, Adele-Shell ❤




Some Adele Inspired Selfies

[make-up , hair, and outfit]

#dontjudge 😉


Adele Make-Up Tips:

Create a somewhat “flawless” face, add bronzer & blush

Fill in your brows, brush them up

Winged dark black liner on lower and upper water line as well as several coats of mascara

Beige, nude, light brown eye shadows

Nude lipstick and gloss

Adele Hair Tips:

Use second day hair

Dry shampoo, mousse, & hairspray

Blow dry top center of head

Flip head over to blow dry

Tease crown

Flip head back over

Tousle with hands until you find desired look 

Adele Outfit Tips:

Black long sleeved shirt

Black furry/fuzzy vest

Faux Fur Scarf


How many Adele song titles did you catch? Can we just talk about how purely amazing 25 is…I’ve had it on repeat since I downloaded it!

*I take no credit for the few Adele song lyrics, many song titles, and Adele images used in my edits to create this Adele 19, 21, & 25 album song titles mash-up/lyrical poem/short story. Whatever you want to call it. Haha.*

*I do however, take credit for all selfies 😉 haha.*




Dissect A Scene: The “Burzek” Breakup #ChicagoPD

This past Wednesday’s episode 3×12 of Chicago PD entitled “Looking Out For Stateville” hit Burzek (Kim Burgess & Adam Ruzek) fans pretty hard with Kim making a surprisetumblr_nvikeoUUHL1sp3bh6o1_1280[1] ending to she and fiancé Adam’s recent engagement. I myself am a huge Burzek fan, I’ve lobbied for them since Season 1. And have really rallied behind their engagement, but this whole season has kept me weary. This scene was the last minute of the episode and it broke my heart, it has been on my mind all week and I have to speak on it!

Read this article [Spoilers involved!] to learn more about the growing frustration behind Burgess’ decision, along with Marina Squerciati’s commentary on her character’s choice.

As the engagement high seemed to fade, Burgess began wanting to make plans and move she and Adam’s life together forward. While, Adam began to play the avoidance game. This scene is the result of that hesitation.

The Dissection:

This scene in it’s entirety is just over a minute long, and yet it will have a fierce impact on the dynamic of the show. It’s held in a simple location; the convenient location of the police station’s locker room. The same locker room they go about their daily work lives in, the same locker room Ruzek proposed to her in, the same locker room these two have shared many emotional yet comforting conversations in relation to heavy days on the job, the same locker room they’ve snuck away to share private kisses and sweet moments. It’s a scene all about dialogue and small looks and silences- it’s essentially nothing fancy. There are no guns, no car chases, no bad guys to take up our time. Just two people, getting their hearts broken.

The scene is basically a one sided dialogue as Kim gets to the realization that Adam is not ready to settle down.  Adam’s reactions are minor as he tries to make light of things and act like Kim’s words aren’t valid, wondering why she’s thinking this way. Although he doesn’t exactly tell her she’s wrong. He doesn’t fight for her in that moment, she tells him he’s off the hook and hands him back the engagement ring.

It isn’t until she does that and walks away, that we see how great of a loss this is for Adam, as he chokes out “Kim” after her retreating figure as his eyes stay glued to the ring in his hand. That right there broke my heart. I think the audience has been with Burgess this whole time, feeling her frustration with him. And although we support her decision, in that moment we all feel for Ruzek, because it’s evident that he does in fact love her, and he doesn’t want her to walk away from their relationship.

Marina Squerciati really shines in her vulnerability. You can tell it is taking all of Burgess’ strength to finally make this decision. And that is absolutely conveyed in Squerciati’s calm, rational, kind delivery. Kim Burgess loves Adam Ruzek, and her letting their relationship go is her understanding that maybe he’s just not in this, therefore preventing an even greater heartache in the future, if she waited it out. No woman wants to stay with a man who doesn’t actually put his plans for marriage into action. He did ask her. He knew it was soon, but he didn’t care. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

Patrick John Flueger plays these tough emotional scenes like a boss. Ruzek’s character has this appeasing nature. He’s constantly bringing the nervous and over thinking Burgess down back to earth. Burgess can kind of become like a scatter brain and rattle on and he’s got a flirtation and charm that just works. Although in his small contributions to the dialogue in this scene and his ducking behind the locker, you notice that he’s realizing he’s been in a state of avoiding moving his relationship forward. His subtle looks tell all. Yet to him, he didn’t see this coming.  

But I knew this break was coming. I didn’t know how it was going to happen, and I hoped that it wouldn’t but I felt something bad was bound to happen. I am however, happy that it was Burgess who ended it, because I think everyone (**cough**Platt**cough**) figured that because of Ruzek’s list of failed engagements, he’d be the one. I just hope these two can find their way back to each other, because they truly have a love that makes you root for them. And I truly hope they don’t try and have Sean Roman make a play for Burgess because he seemed to be very vocal about Ruzek’s resistance. I think Burgess and Roman are better off as partners. Besides Lindsay and Halstead are doing the whole partner/dating thing right now, and they’re doing it well. Let’s leave that to them.

I cannot wait for this week’s episode, it sounds pretty damn good!

I just hope that Ruzek fights for her!  Regardless this break up is going to cause major tension and it is going to be heart breaking but let’s face it, sexy. You know Ruzek is going to be throwing some longing stares, Burgess’ way. I have a feeling we are going to see a sign of Ruzek we haven’t really seen yet. Sure we see how much he loves her, but now we get to see him elevate that, because now he’s lost her. Now he has to grow up. And I’m also super eager to see how Burgess is going to handle working with him, should definitely be interesting.

Chicago PD airs Wednesdays on NBC @10 pm

LIVE TWEET WITH ME! (oh and the cast) 😉



*I do not take credit for any images or videos used.*





Love Conflicted Soundtrack & Author’s Commentary

BACK STORY: Over the past 8 months or so Love Conflicted has been featured on and off the michelle leigh writes blog. Its premiere date was May 11th 2015, and the consistent updates lasted through June 25th 2015. Then I took a massive hiatus from the series. I finally got my act together in the New Year and finished it this week, finishing my stories is incredibly important to me, far too many go unfinished. It was important for me to see this through. Seeing as how I slipped up on this week’s schedule, I figured I’d give you a rare Sunday post, I am thinking about adding Sundays to the schedule, so that will put me at a 3 times a week schedule. However, it is to still be determined, if I can actually commit to that, I don’t want to get ahead of myself. But I may do a trial run and see if it works out. As promised here is the Love Conflicted inspired “Soundtrack” and My Author’s Commentary.

DISCLAIMER: Love Conflicted is not a real motion picture nor does it have a soundtrack coming out. This is just me living in my fictional happy writer’s world. Where I pretend and where I run the show. Haha. Back in college whenever I would hand in a script or be working with already written material/feature film scenes, my professor would ask me who I would have play the characters, where would it take place, what location? And so I think that kind of stuck with me, because as I write this story series I want to include those aspects and give you a visual experience. Mysterious Attraction was my first shot at it, recently A Broken Heart For Christmas, and now also with Love Conflicted. Along the way there have been little one shots, or shorts including a few parts as I will. But that distinction is not always clear, I don’t always know how long a story is going to take to tell. As a kid I used to say “Make Pretend” all the time. Make Pretend you’re a princess who slays dragons. Make pretend you’re a ballerina who bull rides. Make pretend you’re writing a screenplay and you get to pick the actors, and release a soundtrack and commentary that people have been anxiously awaiting. The options could be endless. So let’s “Make Pretend.” Enjoy!



Official full cast photo movie poster


**Love Conflicted** “Soundtrack”

Happy Listening!


Love conflicted soundtrack

Track List

  1. “All In My Head”– Tori Kelly
  2. “I Know What You Did Last Summer”– Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello
  3. “Revival”– Selena Gomez
  4. “Call of the Wild”– Bethany Joy Lenz
  5. “Water Under the Bridge”– Adele
  6. “The Last Time”– Taylor Swift Ft. Gary Lightbody
  7. “Sad Beautiful Tragic”-Taylor Swift
  8. “Blindness”– Justin Timberlake
  9. “What A Good Woman Does”– Joy Williams
  10. “Until the Levee”– Joy Williams
  11. “Stitches”– Shawn Mendes
  12. “I’ll Show You”– Justin Bieber
  13. “Please”– Bethany Joy Lenz
  14. “Stealing”– Gavin Degraw
  15. “When I Was Your Man”– Bruno Mars
  16. “It Will Rain”– Bruno Mars
  17. “The One That Got Away”– The Civil Wars
  18. “Disarm”– The Civil Wars
  19. “I’m A Mess”– Ed Sheeran
  20. “I See Fire”– Ed Sheeran
  21. “Maybe”– Everly-(Bethany Joy Lenz & Amber Sweeney)
  22. “You Found Me”– The Fray
  23. “Leave You Alone”– Kris Allen
  24. “Wanted You More”– Lady Antebellum
  25. “Lesson Learned”– Ray LaMontagne


Onto the next portion…My Love Conflicted *Author’s Commentary*


This drama series was rooted in the love story between two unlikely souls. Maggie an elementary school teacher and Ricky an undercover “mobster” who thought he was working for an honorable CIA organization that turned out to be corrupt. Maggie and Ricky meet by chance and experience an instant spark. The bulk of their relationship is rooted in sub context. You don’t really see much of their love in current time. You experience it through the occasional flashback, through the stories they share about each other, and through the intense conversations they have when are reunited for brief periods of time. You get to see their life together through images on Maggie’s phone as well.

Lily and Ian are introduced gradually. I always feel that my mind automatically goes to a minimum of a 4 person cast. The love story is there, boy meets girl, boy falls for girl, boy gets girl, boy screws up, boy tries to win girl back. And in the mist of all that the story has to keep going…enter supporting characters Ian and Lily. They’re budding love story is just a happy coincidence. Their story is one of a lighter more sarcastic, sassy and fun tone. In contrast to Maggie and Ricky’s love story which is no heartbreaking and so dramatically driven. The “I can’t breathe without you” feel is heavy for those too. Yet Ian and Lily keep things light and let’s be honest they are most comedy you’ll get here. Lily has her one liners that zing, doesn’t she?

Also the story lines Mob nod must be a trend, huh? [See Mysterious Attraction] Ode to Sonny Corinthos and General Hospital.


There are consistent themes of Love, Friendship, Trust, Fear, Bravery, Finding yourself, Coming into your own skin, Independence, Guilt, and ultimately rebuilding and waking each other up to inspire a better way of life. That goes for all characters and all forms of the relationships between these 4 people.


When I sat down with the first scene, it was somewhat of a scene that resembled the first part, where there was this back and forth between Ricky and a female character. You could tell she was angry with him and there was a very good reason, one that he was trying to make light of and gloss over with charm and his belief in their love. His belief that love could somehow help them overcome the catastrophic bomb he just dropped on her. i.e.: that he’s essentially a hit man. But I never really knew who these character would become and getting to know them and writing their dialogue and choosing how they would handle things, that’s been the most fun.

Ricky and Maggie

Ricky: Jesse Lee Soffer (I think he and Lenz would be magic on screen together!)

Ricky faces the blow back from years of horrifying assignments. He finally realizes that what he’s been doing hasn’t been for the better of his country. As he comes to grips with that reality he is faced with trying to protect the woman he loves in the mist of trying to out his corrupt boss, Cobbs. Ricky is a good hearted man, but his job has trained him to perceive himself as a villain of sorts. We never meet Cobbs but we don’t have to. His threat is there, it’s real and evident in Ricky’s fear. He’s almost like this mysterious ghost that looms over them, and we never know if he’s actually going to make his move. I wanted the threat and the fear to be real, without having to have some big reveal or altercation with the actual threat himself. I wanted to sway away from the route Mysterious Attraction took, of kidnappings, and hostage situations. Although the dangers were very similar, the main altercation was ultimately Ricky’s arrest and his choosing to let Maggie go, completely breaking her heart and his own.

 Maggie: Bethany Joy Lenz (She is my QUEEN…I can’t even tell you!)

Maggie is that girl that is so kind and beautiful and so full of hope and light that you just expect no one to ever hurt her. That and the fact that she closes herself off from any kind of risk. Therefore insuring herself she won’t get hurt. She’s the girl that is completely unaware of how amazing she is, and is timid in her sexuality. Meeting Ricky who instantly uses his charm and wit to convince her to take a risk makes her feel alive. The fact that he looks at her in a way that she’s never been looked at before, does wonders for her too. But with all that being said, Maggie comes into her own as she slowly realizes everyone around her is trying to coddle her. She hates feeling like a victim and chooses to take her life in her own hands, going after what she wants.


Lily: Candice Accola-King

If you know my writing, you know the best friend is always the sassy one. [See: Demi Lovato as Roxy in Mysterious Attraction.] I don’t know what it is. But I just feel like the best friend has to be this loose cannon who just speaks the truth. In many way Lily serves as the audience’s perspective. You know when you’re watching a movie or TV show and someone is doing something so stupid you just scream at the TV. Yea, well that’s Lily. She states what should appear as the obvious to the others actors in the story.

meet ian

Ian: Nick Wechsler

Ian is a sweet, calm guy. The voice of reason. Although he too has been involved in these high-stake illegal activities, his self-awareness is much further along than Ricky’s. He knows how to separate himself from his corruption leader of a boss, and knows that his actions were a product of being coerced and trained for years. He also has had a bit more distance than Ricky, as Ricky was made a leader in the organization and felt the brunt of things toward the end, Ian was more of fixer of things, the driver, a tying up loose ends guy. Ian was the one who has been by Ricky’s side, the one who would sacrifice for the wellbeing of everyone. He’s heroic. But it’s a quiet heroism. You don’t realize how self-less he is right off the bat. He’s also got his own charm. His flirtation isn’t as blunt as Ricky’s when it comes to the ladies. He’s a quiet compliment-er, he observes Lily and her nature. He uses what he learns to draw her in and to connect with her. He genuinely speaks his mind and although he goes along with Lily’s sassy flirtation he is completely obvious about his intention to fall in love with her.

-The exclusion of voiceover, the implementation of inner thoughts-

This wasn’t consistent throughout the story. It started off with Maggie’s inner thoughts because she was dealing with a lot on her own, so we had to hear her thoughts. Once Lily was introduced those thoughts were reflected in the dialogue between those two characters as we experienced her pain through the things she confided in her friend.

-The Evolution of relationships-



lily and maggie bffs

It’s evident that Lily and Maggie have been friends their whole lives. Lily is Maggie’s rock. She is the one to look out for her. Let’s face it she has no filter and will test anyone who tries to cause Maggie any pain.


ricky and ian bffs

Throughout the story we see Ricky deal with the consequences of his actions. We see him deal with having to suffer through causing Maggie so much pain. Ian is someone who is brought in to remain the calm, cool, collected person, he’s cool under pressure. He serves as the voice of reason and as Ricky’s eyes, when he can’t be there for Maggie. The one who is Ricky’s right hand man, and will sacrifice to help him in anyway. They have been partners forever, but their friendship is their first priority. They have each other’s backs, always.



ian and lily kiss

Ian passed Lily’s bluster…

When Lily and Ian meet it’s kind of a comedic moment. Rare for this series, but it serves as a breath of fresh air. We see Lily’s sassy nature at its best, and we see that even the most stoic of men can be instantly distracted by a beautiful and alluring woman. Lily is the way she is due to a recent heartbreak. Ian takes his time to court her, proving to her that he’s worth it. Lily’s calm and collected not to mention sassy nature is her defense mechanism. Ian gets to her, with his innocent yet somewhat obvious flirtations.


falling (2)

Took a while, but the love was always there


The main love story is set between Maggie and Ricky. Maggie lives a plain life, a routine life. A life of rules. Ricky follows his own set of rules. When their worlds collide, opposites attract and they find something in each other that compliments them as individuals. Things they have been looking for all along. Ricky instills adventure and confidence in Maggie’s life, showing her how amazing she is while trying to keep a light hearted sexy tone to their conversations. He’s definitely got a bit of a problem with telling her what to do, because he’s so afraid to lose her. His overprotective nature does cost him at times. While, Maggie instills belief, love and stability in Ricky’s life. Bringing a sense of realism to life, showing him that his criminal past isn’t what defines him. Ricky and Maggie have a back and forth that is evident. There is always a high level of tension, because they are always drawn to each other even though they both experience their reservations about being together. Regardless the love is always there.

-What I’ve learned about my writing, and need to work on for my next series and future projects-


*Write the series (or at least the bulk of it) in advance before posting.

Posting as I go makes it hard for me to stay motivated at times and makes it hard to remember where I left off. Which can cause continuity issues and timeline confusions.

*Keep note of the timeline and realize that not everyone can see it as clearly as you can.

This story has taken place over the course or nearly 1 ½-2 years. In real time we see about a year of it. But Maggie and Ricky have had an ongoing relationship for nearly 2 years. They were together for about 6 months before she found out about his job. 6 months he was able to hide and act like a normal boyfriend, but on the sly. Lily was the only one who truly knew they were an actual couple. To the outside world they seemed friendly. When Maggie finds out about Ricky’s job she pulls away. As Ricky begins to fight for her-coming full force to win her back. Maggie thinks she’s pregnant and worries Ricky’s lifestyle will cause her and her child pain. Their relationship moves quickly, as Ricky had revealed they said their “I love you’s” a week after dating. The separation/reuniting period is on and off for a while, and then after Ricky’s arrest, we jump 6 months ahead which allude to the growth these characters have made. In that time Ian and Lily have started their own romance and seem to be smitten with each other. Ricky spent his time getting well, and Maggie spent her time being in her own skin. Although the time apart was painful for both of them, they made it back to each other in the end, better than they were before, with a promising future ahead of them.

*Learn how to implement backstory better.

I feel like the little facts like Maggie’s a school teacher and Lily suffered a bad relationship could have been better thought out and more implemented throughout the story’s entirety. I need to be careful of that next time.

*Describe location, outfits, appearance more thoroughly, paint a picture for the audience. Where are they, what does it look like? Just because I see it, doesn’t mean you do.

*Learn to sus out the basis of the story before I post.

This can be hard because I often don’t know where the story will go. I may have a vague idea, but then as I’m writing the direction can change in an instant.

*Be more consistent and stick to a solid posting schedule.

I usually post on Mondays and Thursdays every week. For a while this series was all I featured on my blog, and then I kind of felt like I needed to regroup and give other categories on my blog some love. But then the series kind of took a really long break and it was hard to get back into, I just kept putting it off.

*Do research BEFORE you post.

With the crime/legal issues/mob story lines there are certain clauses and lingo and statures that go with that type of plotline. I feel like I didn’t know much about what the CIA does and that caused a problem as I wrote Ricky’s character. I would research as I went which I think that caused some inconsistencies and some weirdness. I did my best, hopefully it came across accurately enough.

*Don’t be afraid of sexual content and more explicit language. And don’t apologize.

I think this is a big one for me to learn. I find myself putting warnings and disclaimers before any chapters that contain more adult matters. Sex is a part of relationships and loving someone, and telling a love story. Cursing is part of heated conversation and gives a line a more dignified delivery. In this series, I definitely explored a more adult style of writing. I usually edit myself when it comes to love scenes, because I feel like it may be perceived as slutty or trashy, and I’m still trying to learn how to write an effective love scene. But I think with this series I’m breaking out of my shell slowly. I am 24, so I mean come on now, the things on TV and in the theaters now, would make my Maggie and Ricky measly shower sex scene seem like a Disney Channel movie.

*Write more like a script, then a novel.

This is something that I’ve noticed. I want the series to be read like a movie, and yet I’m writing and reading it like a short story. Formatting definitely needs work.

*Step up your editing images game, and use the slideslow option more often.

I don’t have image editing software on my computer. I actually found a way to edit images through Microsoft, but some edits come out SO BAD. Lol. Some come out pretty good. I’ve definitely gotten better since the Mysterious Attraction days, but I can only imagine the images I could create if I actually had Photoshop! Sometimes I’ll edit an image and it’ll come out pretty good and I will just get so excited. Seeing my characters come together like that makes it almost seem real. Oh just let me live. Let me dream! 😉 WordPress just added the slideshow option (or I just realized they had one) and it makes things so much neater, you can add captions and watch the story unfold like a mini movie. I love it!


So there you have it guys, as this post goes up, we say Good Bye to this series, and plan for the next one. I’m excited! Thank you for reading, and congrats if you had the patience to stay tuned until the end! 😉


Love conflicted says good bye finished

Catch up on Love Conflicted HERE

*I do not take credit for any images used in my edits or otherwise.*


Love Conflicted- Chapter 12

Hey guys….Only January and I already dropped the ball on my Tues/Thurs schedule. I think I underestimated how much time and thought needed to be put into the end of Love Conflicted. That and the fact that I’ve been easily distracted lately. The internet is a vortex I get lost in.



Anyway, that last part just wasn’t quite ready to post, but it is now! Without further hesitation… Stay Tuned for the exciting conclusion (Part 12) of Love Conflicted

New poster


Previously on Love Conflicted…

Read Part 11 HERE

Start from the beginning/Get caught up HERE

new poster illy




Hauled up in a familiar old abandoned house, Ricky sits working on his computer as he taps into the surveillance system of a nearby bar, Ricky once took Maggie here some time ago back when Maggie thought she couldn’t handle having a life with him.

Ricky: We’re in. We’ve got eyes on the interior, all exits and side streets of the underground operation.

Ian nods as he stands over a small table sifting through some audio equipment.

Lily and Maggie emerge from a smaller room off to the side, both dressed rather promiscuous.

Ricky looks up. Ian’s jaw drops.

Ricky: No. Absolutely not.

Maggie: Ricky, you want this to be believable right?

Ricky: Yea of course, but that doesn’t mean you have to dress like that.

Maggie: (hands on her hips) What kind of girls do you think these guys get walking through their doors? No self-respecting, modestly dressed woman is going to show their face there for a cocaine score. It’s all ladies of the street.

Ian: She’s not wrong.

Ricky glares at Maggie.

Ricky: Baby, I love you. And you can totally dress like that for me another night- preferably away from any other wandering eyes- and I will welcome it, because you look sexy as hell. But I don’t think you realize how bad these guys actually are. I don’t want you near any of them dressed like that. It’s way too vulnerable. They’ll just see you as something to take advantage of.

Maggie: Well how do you know they’re all bad? You and Ian aren’t.

Ian and Ricky exchange looks.

Ricky: Maggie, this isn’t Cobbs version of the CIA we’re trying to bust here. All those people are a lot like us, they’ve been brainwashed into thinking they’re protecting the security of our country. We’re dealing with the real deal guys here. They don’t care. They won’t even blink at the slightest sign of humanity. They’re the cold ones. This drug ring is Cobbs’ most prized possession, this is where the big cash rolls in. We get this stuff on record, the police will have no choice but to arrest him and everyone involved.

Lily: Wait a minute, I thought you already had something major on Cobbs that could put him away? Remind me why you’re allowing both myself and the love of your life to risk our lives and enter the danger zone.

Maggie: Lily…?

Lily: No. Look I’m sorry okay-I don’t mind helping-But I think it deserves some kind of explanation. This whole time everything you’ve done was to protect us from being in danger. And now you are literally putting us right in the middle of it.

Ian: What we have is good. But how we got it- is illegal.

Maggie and Lily exchange glances.

Ricky: I was finally able to hack into a database holding several files regarding legal cases, some date as far back as 20 years ago. A bunch of sealed files of crime cases Cobbs should have done time for. But judges covered up for Cobbs for years, if you throw enough money at people, problems can vanish, like that (he snaps his fingers.) With all the shots against us already, if Ian and I have any chance of actually passing this off as evidence that will hold up in court, we need something current, something concrete.

Ian: Something obtained naturally. If we go to the Cops as is, we’re bound to get arrested for working under Cobbs for all these years.

Lily: It’s still really risky if you ask me.

Ian: We’ll have eyes on you the whole time. You’ll wear wires. We’re right here, if trouble starts, we’ll know. We’ll be in there in seconds.

Lily: And what if we get made, what if these guys sense we’re moles? It takes a second to pull a trigger.

Maggie: Lily?

Ricky: No. She’s right. What the hell was I thinking?

Maggie: Ricky.

Ricky: No. It’s the truth. We need a new plan. Now.

Maggie: Ok… come with me.

Maggie grabs his hand and drags him into the next room.

Ian and Lily exchange glances.

Lily: I’m sorry, I’m not trying to mess with the plan- but it had to be said.

Ian: I get it. It’s a completely valid concern.

Lily: Thank you for understanding.

Ian: You don’t ever have to apologize for who you are. Not with me.

Lily gives him a small smile.

Ian: You know we would never have asked if we thought we couldn’t protect you.

Lily: No I know. But sometimes things don’t always go as planned ya know? Maggie has been through hell, I just want her to be okay.

Ian: We all do. But you’re right. Regardless, I would never let anything happen to either of you. I can have you in and out in a matter of minutes.


Most of the furniture is all dusty and covered in sheets still. The layer of dust slightly heavier than the last time. The floor creakier, the quiet slightly more eerie. And the dimly lit rooms, seem to be getting darker by the second as the deep night falls upon them.

Ricky: Maggie, baby I’m so sorry. I had no right to ask you to be any part of this.

Maggie: Hey. Stop it. I’m glad that you’re finally keeping me in the loop.

Ricky: But Lily’s right. Everything I’ve done, all the pain I’ve caused, all the days we had to spend a part was because I was trying to keep you safe- keep you away from this world. I never wanted my job to affect you.

Maggie: Hey. (She reaches for him and he pulls away) Hey come here, (pulling him to her) Look at me, I’m fine. Lily’s just being her overprotected self, it’s why we love her.

Ricky: Yea I know. She is right. I’ve got you going into the thick of it. I don’t want you anywhere near this.

Maggie: Ricky you have no other choice. If you and Ian go in there, you’re as good as dead. You know that they’ll recognize you and they’ll know your there to take them down.

Ricky: Better me then you.

Maggie glares at him.

Maggie: Don’t.

Ricky looks at her, his eyes filling.

Ricky: Do you remember when you found out about my job? Do you remember how you looked at me? With disdain. Like you hated me.

Maggie: I was upset and shocked. You had been lying to me for months. It was just a knee jerk reaction.

Ricky: You wouldn’t even let me touch you. You were afraid of me.

Maggie: I was afraid of what could happen if I let myself love you. Because in spite of everything I still did. I still do. (She kisses the corner of his lips.)

Ricky looks at her, he gives in, kissing her for a brief moment.

Ricky: You were right to be afraid of me. I don’t deserve you, I never did.

Ricky pulls away from her, walking off to the side.

*Flashback* (Over a year ago)

Maggie is in a darkened warehouse. She walks through aimlessly. Searching for something. For an answer. She hears angry voices and yelling, she hides behind a few stacks of boxes.

She recognizes one of the male voices.

Maggie peers out and sees Ricky standing there.

Ricky is yelling at a scruffy, dingy dressed, bearded man.

The man holds up his hands.

“Don’t make a move, or I will blow your head off.” Ricky says in crisp cold tone.

Maggie’s eyes widen as she watches in fear. Unknowingly holding her breath.

The man begins to plead with Ricky for his life.

He impulsively reaches for his gun.

Ricky shoots him, point blank, without blinking.

Maggie stands there frozen.          

Ricky there before her, standing over the dead body. Blood seeping into the ground.

Ricky signs. His glare intense. He lowers his gun.

Just then his phone buzzes. Ricky answers, holding the phone to his ear.

“It’s done. Send in the cleanup crew.”

Ricky hangs up the phone. Turning he sees Maggie standing there.

Her face full of fear, her eyes full of tears, her body frozen, yet shaking.

Ricky’s eyes widen as he makes a move toward her.

Maggie steps back, her face growing from confused fear to complete terror.

“Maggie…” he whispers, his heart dropping.

Maggie turns and begins to run.

Ricky holsters his gun and rushes after her.

Maggie makes it to an exit door and bursts through it. Her heart pounding, her breathing sporadic.

Ricky runs through seconds later his eyes searching for her.

“Maggie. Maggie, baby, I can explain.” He walks toward her, reaching for her.

“Don’t touch me!” she screams.

“Maggie, please.”

“Who are you?” she says looking at him with disdain.

“I’m still me.”

“No you’re not. You’re not. The man I fell for was charming, and sweet and had the kindest eyes.”

“Baby I still am that guy. I just have a different job description.”

“Which is what? What possible job could you have that would condone you killing a man in cold blood?”

Ricky looks away.

Maggie’s wheels begin to turn.

“You’re a mobster?” she asks coming to a realization.

Ricky’s eyes fall. He knows he doesn’t want to lie to her any more than he already has, yet he knows he can’t risk telling her the truth just yet. So he just doesn’t answer, and lets her make her own conclusion.

“So what- you just go around killing people, who what- “do you wrong?”

“It’s a little more complicated than that. I don’t exactly make the final call. I have a boss.”

Maggie looks at him. Her hands still trembling.

Ricky notices.

He steps toward her, reaching for her. “You’re shaking…”

He manages to pull her close to him, cupping her face with his hand.

“No,” she pushes him away. “Don’t touch me. I don’t want you touching me ever again!”

Maggie turns as she begins to walk away quickly from him into the night.

Ricky rushes after her.

“Maggie. I know this is a lot to take in. But you just need time to cool down. Then we can talk and try to figure things out.”

“Cool down? I just watched you kill a man. I’m not going to forget that. Everything isn’t going to just be okay. Not after this. If you thought that it would, you must be delusional.”


“Don’t. Just don’t.” she says crying “You’re a completely different person to me now.”

Ricky hangs his head, his eyes tearing up.

“I used to feel safe in your arms. And now-” Maggie stops looking around, wrapping her arms around her body, trying to protect herself.

“You don’t have to be afraid of me Maggie. I would never hurt you.”

“How can someone who has held my hand and kissed me and touched me in the most graceful, caring ways, use the same pair of hands to pull the trigger and kill a man without even flinching.”

“I’ve been trained to be a certain way for the job…but that’s not all I am.”

“I don’t care. I don’t want to hear anymore. As far as I’m concerned it’s just another excuse.”

“Maggie please. This can’t be it for us.”

“That poor man. What could he have possibly done, to deserve… that?”

“There are a lot of things you don’t know. It’s complicated.”

“And I don’t wanna know. This relationships over.”

“Maggie…” he grabs her arm.

“Let go of me. Or I will scream and draw attention to the criminal you are.”

Maggie glares at him.

Ricky steps back, her words a blow to his heart.

Maggie still a shaky mess tries to walk away. She gets a few inches away before doubling over and vomiting.

Ricky rushes over, holding her hair back.

“Okay. You’re okay. I think everything has been a bit of a shock to your system.”

Maggie wipes her mouth and stands up, swatting him away.

“I’m going home. Don’t follow me. And do me a favor. Lose my number.”

Ricky looks at her pain etched on his face.

“I know you hate me right now. I get it. But at least let me drop you home. It’s late.”

“So what? All bad guys are the same. You should know that.”

Maggie walks away.

“Take the ride as offered. Or I will throw you over my shoulder and make you take it.”

Maggie stops and looks at him.

“You don’t get to play the over protective boyfriend role right now.”

“Maggie. It’s just a ride home. I promise. I’ll drop you home, and I’ll leave.”

Maggie and Ricky’s eyes lock for a minute. Ricky can almost see a touch of consideration in Maggie’s expression. Maybe all hope wasn’t lost.

Until the exit door opens and Ian stands there.

Ian: Rick. We need you.

Ricky turns.

Ricky: 5 minutes.

Ricky turns back toward Maggie, and she’s gone.

Ricky looks around. He angrily punches the door in.

-End of flashback-

Ricky: I remember feeling like my whole world exploded that night. I really thought I’d never see you again.

Maggie: Well, here I am. And I love you even more than I did back then.

Ricky: Why?

Maggie: What do you mean why?

Ricky: Why do you love me? I mean you said it once before, I’m a criminal…all bad guys are the same.

Maggie glances at him sternly.

Maggie: Come on. I was reacting to seeing my boyfriend kill a man. I didn’t know the full story.

Ricky: Like the full story is any better. Either way you paint it, I still spent my life killing.

Maggie: You thought you were protecting people from the bad guys. And you were, I mean it’s not as if any of the people you had to kill lived an honest life. Especially since they were all involved with Cobbs in some way.

Ricky: You don’t need to justify my actions. I was wrong. It’s okay to admit that. I never had to kill anyone. I made a choice to believe I had to.

Maggie: You didn’t know your boss was a fraud and a sociopath who was brainwashing you.

Ricky looks away.

Maggie: Hey. (She cups his face) You are a good man. With a good heart. You are. If you weren’t we wouldn’t be having this conversation. The real bad guys have no remorse for their actions.

Ricky: When you say it, I actually almost believe it.

Maggie: Believe it, baby.

Ricky: I never did know how you ended up in the warehouse that day?

Maggie: I followed you. I felt like you had been kind mysteriously leaving our dates abruptly and all the calls you’d take outside away from earshot. Initially I kind of thought you were cheating.

Ricky: Are you kidding me? I could never want anyone but you. (He says cupping her face with both of his hands.)

Maggie: I knew something was up with you. I just thought cheating could have been a possibility.

Ricky: Bet you kind of wish that’s all it was, huh? Would have made your life a whole lot easier. I mean sure my character would have been questioned but not so catastrophically. Cheating can’t put you in jail.

Maggie: No. But it would have made me question if you love me. Job or no job. I now know you do.

Ricky: Do you know how much I love you?

Maggie: Yes. (She smiles) Almost as much as I love you.

Ricky: Not possible. (He smiles softly as he pulls her into a kiss.)


Ian and Lily walk in.

Lily: So. Are we doing this thing?

Ricky: No. We’re not. I am.

Maggie looks at him.

Maggie: Ricky, no.

Ricky: I can’t let you go in there. I won’t. They think I’m dead. We still have a bit of an edge. It’ll be fine. I’ll get in, get what we need, something concrete and physical. And get out.

Ian: Let’s get wired up then.

Ian tosses a mic pack to Ricky as he begins hooking on his own.

Ricky: What are you doing?

Ian: I’m going with you.

Ricky: No you’re not.

Ian looks at him.

Maggie: You’d don’t actually think you’re going in there alone do you?

Ricky: Yes. I am. I won’t put any more people’s lives in danger.

Maggie: Ricky.

Ian: Rick, Dude. Things will go a lot smoother if you let me help you.

Ricky: You’ve helped me enough Ian. I’ve got this one.

Ricky goes to walk toward the exit.

Maggie stops him, by walking in front of his path and placing her hand on his chest.

Maggie: Either you let Ian go with you, or I’m going in.

Ricky: You going in isn’t an option anymore.

Maggie looks at him, turning on her heel, she rushes toward the door.

Ricky and the gang rush after her.

Ricky grabs her back in, closing the door behind her.

Ricky: Are you out of your mind?

Maggie: Are you?

Rick gives her a stern glare.

Maggie: Haven’t you leaned you can’t tell me what to do. Don’t test me Ricky. I am my own person with my own brain. I know what I can and can’t handle.

Ian: Rick, man. Let me just go in with you.

Ricky: Fine. But neither of you leave this house, you hear me? And the minute we leave you lock this door.

Maggie: Deal.

Lily nods.

Ian grabs his coat.

Ricky and Ian head towards the door.

Maggie: Ricky.

Ricky turns.

Maggie’s eyes begin to fill up.

Maggie: In and out. Okay?

Ricky nods, walking swiftly over to her, he grabs her and kisses her.

Ricky: I love you.

Maggie: I love you.

Ian and Lily look on.

Lily’s eyes lock onto his.

Lily: Be safe in there.

Ian: I do owe you a date.

Lily: That’s right.

Ian smiles leaning in, he kisses her cheek.

Ricky and Ian walk toward the door.

Lily: Hey Ricky, I’m sorry for-

Ricky: No. Don’t be. You were right. It’s nice to know that no matter what you’re always looking out for Maggie.

Lily smiles.

Ricky: We’ll be back.

Rick grabs Maggie’s hand and kisses it, before he leaves.

Lily locks the door behind them.

Maggie rushes over to the computer screen to watch the surveillance.


Ian and Ricky knock on the back door of the bar.

Three quick knocks. Two slow knocks. A secret knock.

The door opens and a dark skinned man stands there.

Man: Can I help you? He barks.

Ricky: Yea we’re looking for Cobbs.

Man: Yea. What you want with him?

Ricky: We heard this is the place to score some prime C.

Man: You have the money.

Ricky pulls a few hundreds from his back pocket and holds them up.

The man takes it with one hand, and in one swift move, he slaps a handcuff on Ricky’s wrist with the other.

Ricky’s face falls.

Man: FBI you’re under arrest.

The man turns Ricky around as he cuffs his other hand behind his back.

Another cop emerges from the door and handcuffs Ian.

As Ricky and Ian exchange nervous glances, they peer into the underground room. It’s under a complete investigation, crawling with police tape and officers logging evidence.

Ricky: Don’t say a word, Ian. I’ll handle this.

Maggie and Lily watch on horrified.

Maggie rushes for the door.

Lily: Stop. You can’t you don’t want to be an accessory, just wait it out. Let’s get out of these trashy clothes and we’ll meet them at the station okay?

Maggie sighs as tears stream down her face.

Lily: Hey. Don’t let your mind run wild just yet. Ok? We’re gonna be ok, I promise you.

Maggie: How do you know that?

Lily: Because we always are.

Lily pulls her into a side hug.


Maggie and Lily rush into the local precinct.

Maggie walks up to the front desk.

Maggie: Excuse me, I’m looking for Ricky Roman.

Lily taps her, as two cops escort Ian and Ricky into the station.

Ricky’s eyes land on Maggie.

Maggie: Ricky! She rushes over to him.

A female desk sergeant stops her.

Desk Sergeant: I’m going to have to ask you to take a seat. He’s got to go through the process.

Maggie: When are visiting hours?

Desk Sergeant: Not until tomorrow morning.

Maggie’s face drops as her tears fall more freely.

Lily reaches for her.

Ricky notices from afar.

Ricky: Baby. Baby. It’s ok.

The officers shove him into an interrogation room. And Ian into a separate one.

Hours go by and Lily and Maggie sit nervously in the waiting area, completely exhausted at this point, and looking for answers.

Maggie gets up and walks over to the front desk.

Maggie: Excuse me, it’s been hours, can you please tell me anything about what’s going on with my boyfriend. What’s he being charged with?

Desk Sergeant: Name?

Maggie: His name is Ricky Roman. I just asked you about him a few minutes ago, are you deaf or just a victim of shitty short term memory?

The woman glares up at her.

Desk Sergeant: Would you like to spend your night in a cell too?

Lily jumps up and rushes over.

Lily: Ok. Alright. That won’t be necessary. It’s just the stress talking, (she says swaying Maggie back over to their seats.)

Maggie: I can’t take not knowing what’s happening?

Lily: Look I understand ok? This sucks from all ends. But you have got to calm down.

Lily and Maggie fall asleep in the chairs.


The next morning a male officer taps Maggie on the shoulder.

Maggie wakes up and nudges Lily awake.

Officer: Are you here for Ricky Roman?

Maggie: Yes.

Officer: You can see him now.

Maggie: Oh thank god.

She stands up in a hurry.

Lily: And Ian- oh my god I don’t even know his last name, (She reflects.)

Ian comes walking out from a nearby back room.

Lily and Maggie’s eyes shoot up.

Maggie: Hey are you okay?

Ian: Yea. Thanks.

Maggie: Where’s Ricky?

Officer: This way ma’am.

Maggie looks on worried as the officer ushers her into the back.

Lily turns to Ian.

Lily: What’s going on?

Ian: They let me go.

Lily: And Ricky?

Ian: He took the blame for everything.

Lily: And you let him?

Ian: I had no choice. He made me promise that if we ever got arrested, that I let him take the wrap, and I keep Maggie safe.

Lily looks on with worried eyes.

Maggie follows the officer to a hall full of cells.

Guys are cat calling as Maggie walks by.

Officer: Enough.

They simmer down.

They reach a cell all the way at the end, sectioned off.

Ricky sits there his head in his hands.

Maggie: Ricky!

Ricky’s head jolts up.

He rushes to the gate.

The officer unlocks the gate and opens it for Maggie to walk in.

Closing it behind them.

Officer: You have 10 minutes.

He walks away.

Maggie: Ricky!

She rushes into his arms.

Ricky: God I am so glad you’re not in that outfit.(he tries to laugh and make light of things) This place is full of slime.

Maggie: Ricky. What’s going on?

Ricky pauses. He cups her face and kisses her for a minute.

Maggie: Talk to me. Please.

Ricky: The FBI has been watching Cobbs for the past few months. They knew what type of operation he’s been running. They know Ian and I worked for him. Cobb’s underground operation was raided minutes before we showed up. All his workers and Cobbs himself are in custody. We got him. He’s going away for a long long time.

Maggie: And what about you? I mean they released Ian, so that means they’ll release you soon too, right?

Ricky: No.

Maggie: What do you mean no?

Ricky: Maggie I’m being charged.

Maggie: With what? You didn’t work for that part of Cobbs’ operation. 

Ricky: Yea but, I was involved in everything else under the sun.

Maggie: Well did you tell them the whole story? Did you tell them everything? Why you did what you did?

Ricky: Somehow they just don’t care. As far as they know I worked for Cobbs for years and I knew all along.

Maggie: But you didn’t.

Ricky shrugs.

Maggie: We can fight this. We’ll get you the best lawyer.

Ricky: It doesn’t matter babe.

Maggie: So what you’re not gonna fight it?

Ricky: I belong in here.

Maggie looks at him in disbelief.

Maggie: How long?

Ricky: 10 to 15. And that’s with a deal for cooperating.

Maggie doubles over as she suddenly feels like she had the air knocked out of her.

Maggie’s tears fall, as Ricky pulls her into him, he looks into her eyes. Wiping away her tears.

Maggie pulls herself together as she tries to think positively.

Maggie: Ok. Ok, I know it’s a long time. But we can make it worth. I can come see you…all the time. And when you get out we can be together.

Ricky smiles, touching her face and staring at her lovingly.

Maggie searches his face for some kind of reassurance.

Ricky’s face frowns.

Maggie: What?

Ricky: Maggie…I love you so much…But-

Maggie: But what- there is no but, you love me, and I love you.

Ricky: Maggie…

Maggie: No. No don’t Maggie me.

Ricky reaches for her.

Maggie: When this is all over with, we can be together. I mean that’s what the whole deal was, wasn’t it? We stay apart while you gather the information you need to get him put away. Am I missing something here? Am I crazy? Or is that not what you told me. What you kept telling me.

Ricky: No, you’re not crazy. That was the initial plan.

Maggie: Ok so what changed?

Ricky: Maggie I love you more than I did yesterday, and more than the day before that, and I can promise you that I will love you even more tomorrow. But this whole thing just made me realize that… maybe… we’re not the best fit. You’re better off without me. And I’m going to prison.

Maggie: So I can wait for you.

Ricky: I don’t want you to. That’s not a life.

Maggie’s eyes gloss over and her stare turns cold.

Maggie: Don’t you dare.

Ricky: Maggie, baby. You need to let me go.

Maggie: You asshole.

Ricky: Baby please-

Maggie: Don’t. You are full of empty promises. You make me wait on you this whole time, when you really didn’t even have any intention of following through. Did you want to get caught? Did you wish for this? Is it some kind of sick version of self-punishment, because you think this is where you deserve to be?

Ricky: Of course I intended to be with you. I never wanted to hurt you, you have to know that. But what kind of man would I be if I didn’t answer for my crimes.

Maggie: Wow you can put on quite a show. Was I part of your cover too? Just the mobster with a heart of gold who falls for the little timid elementary school teacher. Right?

Ricky: Of course not. I have always been honest about how I feel about you.

Maggie: Right, because honesty is your specialty.

Ricky: Maggie.

Maggie: You don’t wanna be with me. Fine. Just own up to it.

Ricky: Maggie. That is not what this is about, and you know it. I love you so much. And I love you enough to let you go.

Maggie: And I just don’t get a say in this? You’re just gonna choose what’s best for me…again?

Ricky: Maggie I can’t gamble with your life again. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you spent your life waiting on me. You can’t put it on hold because of my stupid mistakes.

Maggie: (tears are rolling down her cheeks as she keeps wiping them away) Fine. But this is it. You don’t get third and fourth chances. Not with me. You’re lucky you got a second. And now that’s all irrelevant. I don’t want you keeping tabs on me, I’m sure you have ways of doing that even though you’re in here. You don’t want this? Fine.Have it your way. Guard, we’re done here, (She says yelling from the cell.)

Ricky: Wait Maggie, will you just let me explain…

Maggie: Guard.

Maggie leaves without another word.

Knowing that he just made the biggest mistake in his life, Ricky sinks to the floor of his cell.

Maggie collapses to the floor in sobs in the waiting room as Lily rushes to her side.

Ian walks over to the side, he makes a call.


*6 Months Later*

It’s Maggie’s 25th birthday and Lily is throwing her a party. It’s been 6 months since Ricky was arrested.

The party is full of glitter and glam, champagne is being popped and poured. The DJ is alive with energy and the food is circling. People are mingling and the room is in party mode.

Maggie stands admiring her best friend’s handiwork.

lily and maggie bffs

Maggie: Lily this is amazing! Thank you so much.

Lily: Well with all the craziness that has gone down recently, you deserved this.

Maggie smiles and pulls her friend into a hug.

Lily notices Ian walk in with a familiar face. Her eyes widen as she pulls away from her hug with her best friend.

ricky and ian bffs

Maggie notices.

Maggie: What?

Ricky walks up behind her.

Ricky: Hey Maggie. Happy Birthday.

Maggie stills hearing his voice.

Maggie: (turning) What are you doing here?

Ricky: I was invited.

Maggie looks over at a scheming Lily and Ian who watch eagerly.

Maggie gives Lily a death glare.

Lily just holds her hands out with a shrug of her shoulders.

Maggie: Were you now?

Ricky nods.

Maggie: Excuse me, for just a second.

Maggie walks quickly over to Lily.

Ian: Good Luck see ya.

Ian ducks out over to the bar.

Maggie: Are you crazy? You invited Ricky to my birthday party?

Lily: Hey I just did what you couldn’t do. You obviously miss him.

Maggie: That’s not the point.

Lily: Ok so then what is the point, Maggie? Because you are miserable. I know you’ve been trying to hide it but I know you, and it’s killing me to see you this way.

Maggie: (sighs) I love you for caring about me, I do. But I am not the one who ended things Lily. He was. Do you know how difficult it is to look at him, let alone talk to him? And on my birthday of all days. God, I just-

Lily: You ever think that maybe he regrets his decision?

Maggie: If he did, he would have reached out over the past 6 months. It’s not like he was in jail that long, Ian’s lawyer had him out in a matter of days.

Lily: You told him not to reach out.

Maggie: And he listened. If he wanted me, he would have fought for me.

Lily: He’s here, isn’t he?

Maggie: Yea only because you invited him.

Lily: I don’t think I’m the one you should be talking to about this.

Ricky walks up behind Maggie.

Ricky: I think she’s right.

Maggie turns.

Lily: I’m gonna go find my man. Good luck, (she pats Ricky on the shoulder, walking off to where Ian stands by the bar.)

Ricky: Can we talk?

Maggie: (shrugging) I guess so.

Ricky: Maybe we can go somewhere a little more private?

Maggie: You want me to leave my own party? Sure why not. (She walks off into the hallway of the party venue.)

Ricky: I came here, because I needed you to know-

Maggie: Why did you do it? How could you do it? Did you think about it? What it would do to me? Because I have replayed our entire relationship over in my head a thousand times, over the past 6 months, and I still can’t fathom how you could just walk away. I know I couldn’t. But you left me no choice. So I wanna know. Did you think about it? How you just decided for me. You just decided my fate without even asking me. You broke my heart, just because you could.

Ricky: That is not how it happened.

Maggie: No?

Ricky: No.

Maggie: You promised me things Ricky. I waited for you. And then when things got tough you just bailed on me, throwing away everything we built.

Ricky: I can’t even begin to explain how much I regret the way I handled things. It just seems like I keep messing this up.

Maggie: You regret it? You regret it. What about apologizing? What about being sorry for excluding the woman you claim to love from your life? What about that, Ricky?

Ricky: I do love you. And I am sorry about how much I hurt you. But I will not apologize for wanting to protect you. For wanting you to be happy.

Maggie: Oh ok. (she rolls her eyes)

Ricky: Hey. Don’t roll your eyes at me, I’m dead serious right now. I love you, you know I do.

Maggie: Then why?

Ricky: You know why.

Maggie: We talked about babies Ricky, we talked about marriage and being together. You don’t just go from planning forever with someone to saying goodbye. It didn’t have to be all or nothing, you didn’t have to crush my heart the way that you did. There is such a thing as middle ground, communication. But no you took it upon yourself to just end it. Well you got your wish, you can go now.

Ricky: Believe me, letting you go, was the most debilitating thing I have ever experienced. Do you think that I’ve been ok this whole time? I mean you must have some kind of demented image of me in your head, if you think that the pain you felt wasn’t the same I felt.

Maggie: Fine. I get it. We’re good. You can go now.

Ricky: We’re not done.

Maggie: Like hell we are.

Maggie goes to walk away, Ricky grabs her arm.

They both feel that familiar spark.

Maggie: What do you not get? I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to talk to you.

Ricky: There you go lying to yourself again, (He pulls her closer.)

Maggie: Don’t.

Ricky: Don’t what?

Maggie: Don’t try and manipulate me Ricky. That whole flirtation bit where you try to handle me isn’t going to work. We are here because of the choice you made. And I warned you that was your last chance. So let me go.

Ricky sighs and releases her unwillingly.

Maggie sighs of relief and begins to walk away.

Ricky: Maggie…

He rushes over to her, pulling her into a kiss.

Maggie pushes him away angrily.

Maggie: What else do you want?

Ricky: I Want You.

Maggie laughs.

Maggie: You know you keep saying that. But everything you’ve done has proven otherwise. Do you enjoy playing games with me? Because you had me, and then you broke it off, several times actually. Proving to me that you are not in this. I can’t keep doing this with you, I can’t keep putting my heart at risk. Because that to me is worse than any bodily harm your line of work could have possibly caused me. You had me, and you didn’t want me, so you can’t change your mind and expect me to just go along with it. Haven’t you learned by now, that you can’t handle me! I’m not your puppet.

Ricky: I’m not handling you, and I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel like I am trying to. But I have never not wanted to be with you. I was just trying to think of your happiness. I realize that I went about it all wrong and that I should have trusted that we could make it work together and let you decide for yourself. I was stupid, and wrong. I was in a bad head space Maggie. God if I was in my right mind, do you honestly think I could ever let you go. I was so ridden with guilt. I thought you were better off without me. Since I’ve been out I’ve been going to therapy and just trying to be that guy you met at the start of us.

Maggie looks at him.

Maggie: Has therapy been helping you? (She asks curiously folding her arms over her chest)

Ricky: Yea. A lot actually. It made me realize things I couldn’t see clearly before.

Maggie: Like what?

Ricky: That I was suffering from the effects of that type of job, and I wasn’t ready or able to forgive myself, let alone let you love me. But I do want to be with you. And I think you wanna be with me too.

Maggie: Look I’m glad that you’re doing better. But that ship has sailed. We lost a lot of time. Too much.

Ricky: We can get it back.

Maggie looks away.

Ricky: You look beautiful by the way. I mean you’ve definitely changed, but I like the new look.

Maggie: Well tragedy can stir up change.

Ricky: Well it’s certainly working for you, (he looks at her the way he always used to. And Maggie instantly feels her stomach flutter.)

Maggie: Don’t do that.

Ricky: What I can’t compliment you anymore?

Maggie: No. And you can’t look at me like that anymore either.

Ricky: What way am I looking at you? (He says walking closer to her.)

Maggie: Like you-

Ricky: Like I love you?

Maggie: You broke up with me. You don’t want to be with me, the sooner you admit that the sooner you can move on. Why would you even come here?

Ricky: Is that what you really think? That I broke things off because I don’t wanna be with you? Have you not been listening to anything I’ve been saying? I swear sometimes I just think you like to pick a fight. You only choose to hear what you think will help your case. When in reality there is nothing further from the truth.

Maggie: I just think that you don’t know what you want. That maybe I’m just convenient. At first I didn’t think that. I thought you were genuinely worried about me and wanted me to be happy. And I could on some level understand that. Respect you for caring that much. But when you realized that you were in the clear. You didn’t once reach out. You didn’t fight for me at all. And it just made me realize that I had completely deluded myself into thinking that you actually loved me.

Ricky: Ok. I’m going to respectfully ignore the fact that you keep saying things like that. Of course I loved you. I am still so in love with you. Maggie, after everything we have had together, do you honestly think I could walk away from you without feeling like my heart exploded into a million pieces.

Maggie: Well you have a funny way of showing it.

Ricky: I was trying to respect you and give you space. And I had to make sure that everything was fully resolved with me before I came back into your life. I wasn’t going to risk uplifting it again. And… I had to save up.

Maggie: Save up for what?

Ricky: For this.

He takes a ring box from his pocket.

Maggie looks at the box and then locks eyes with Ricky.

Maggie: What is that?

Ricky hands her the small box.

Ricky: Open it and find out.

Maggie: Ricky I-

Ricky: Open it, (he playfully touches her chin.)

Maggie looks at the box, she takes a deep breath and opens it to find a big diamond engagement ring.

Maggie: (gasps) Ok. I can’t breathe.

Ricky: (laughs) Stay with me on this, ok?

Maggie nods, completely baffled.

Ricky smiles taking her left hand and kneeling down on one knee.

Maggie: Oh my god.

Ricky: You wanted forever.

Maggie: Only if you want it too.

Ricky: (rolls his eyes at her) I love you. I don’t like my life without you. It’s unbearable. You mean the world to me, and I know that this hasn’t been easy, and we’ve been on a painful roller coaster for a while. But I have never not for one second, stopped loving you. I love your heart and how you wear it on your sleeve. I love your eyes, how they sparkle and how they can always read me. It’s kind of creepy and crazy. (He laughs) I love your smile, and your creative mind. I love how you come home smelling like Elmer’s glue and covered in paint and glitter. I love that you love kids and that you’re so good with them. I love that you love with your whole body and soul and how you truly listen and take the time to get to know people. I love how having you in my arms every night magically fixes everything. I’ve really missed that. I love how we can sit watching movies for hours in our sweats, eating junk food and then still choose to order Chinese food and you still manage to look flawless.

Maggie is laughing and shaking her head, taking it all in stride.

Ricky: I love how you love.

Maggie is in tears at this point.

Ricky: I know that I hurt you, and you have to understand that it wrecked me to leave you. But I’m back and I want to make you happy, I want to make up for the time that we lost. I want for us to have the future we planned, the future we deserve. And I’m not letting one more day pass by without having you in my life. So if you haven’t completely given up on me yet…I was just wondering if maybe you’d consider, marrying me?

Maggie: (shrugs) Took you long enough.

Ricky laughs.

Ricky: Is that a yes?

Maggie: That’s a yes.

Ricky puts the ring on Maggie’s finger and stands up to meet Maggie for a kiss.

Ricky kisses Maggie and hugs her tightly.

Ricky: Do you like the ring?

Maggie: (looks at it) It’s perfect.

Ricky: I love you so much.

Maggie: I love you.

She cups his face and kisses him.

Ricky: Happy birthday love.

Maggie smiles and kisses him again.

Maggie and Ricky walk back into the hall hand in hand.

Lily and Ian notice.

Lily: Told you it’d work, (she nudges Ian with her hip.)

Ian: Your superpowers scare me.

Lily laughs and kisses him.

Maggie and Ricky walk over to them.

Lily: So…I’m guessing we worked things out?

Maggie: Oh yea, I mean if he ever tries to break up with me again, I will have to kill him. But- (Ricky laughs and wraps his arms around her) I uh I think that we’re good. (She says tucking her hair behind her ear and showing off her ring.)

Lily notices.

Lily: Holy shit! Shut up! (She grabs her best friend’s hand.)

Maggie laughs.

Lily: Oh my GOD! Oh my god! (She shrieks and jumps up and down hugging Maggie.) This ring is gorgeous! Ricky you did good.

Ricky laughs.

Ian: I think what Lily is trying to say is Congratulations you guys.

Ian shakes hands with Ricky.

Ian: Congratulations brother.

Ricky: Couldn’t have gotten here without you. Thanks for having my back and for watching over these lovely ladies, (he says gesturing toward Lily and Maggie as he pulls Maggie into a side hug.)

Ian nods.

Ian: It’s a pleasure. Thank you for having my back.

Ricky nods.

Maggie and Lily are hugging and freaking out.

Ricky: (noticing he leans over to Ian) But…I should probably apologize in advance…

Ian: Why?

Ricky: Because…the pressures on buddy…you’re next.

Ian looks at Ricky, then at Lily as he smiles.


Maggie turns to Ricky as she smiles, before she kisses him.

Maggie: I guess we have a wedding to plan.

Ricky: I guess we do.

Maggie: Do you want a big wedding or a small wedding?

Ricky: Whatever you want, (he says wrapping his arms around her and kissing her.)

Maggie: You don’t have an opinion? (She smiles up at him.)

Ricky: As long as I have you there, I’m covered. You’re all I want, you’re all I need.

Maggie smiles brightly as she kisses him.

Maggie: But you know after the wedding, our first order of business-

Ricky: Babies. (He says smiling knowingly)

Maggie: Yes. (She says smiling)

Ricky: Hell yes, I don’t care how many times we have to do it. How many days we have to spend in bed.  (he smirks leaning in to kiss her again as she laughs.)


Lily walks over to Ian

Lily: I throw the best birthday parties ever.

Ian: (blurts out) You think you’ll ever marry me?

Lily looks over at him.

Lily: Are you asking me?

Ian: Just inquiring for future reference.

He says staring straight ahead, not making eye contact with her curious eyes.

Lily: Hmm.

Ian’s eyes shift over to her, his lips smirking.

Lily: I kinda love you, you know that.

Ian’s expression stuns.

Ian: Did you just-

Lily: Yup.

Ian: But that’s the first time you’ve ever-

Lily: I know. (She smiles)

Ian turns to her, taking her hands in his.

Ian: I love you too.

Lily: Yea I figured, (she smiles pulling him into a kiss, as Ian laughs against her lips.)


*Flashback* (Over a year ago)

Maggie comes out of the school, her hands full of creative craft supplies.

She begins dropping them one by way, by accident.

Ricky driving on a motorcycle is held at a red light and notices her, his eyes looking her over. He smiles to himself.

“Ugh,” he hears Maggie’s aggravated sigh.

Ricky drives off to the side and parks his bike. He walks over to a very frazzled Maggie.

Kneeling down he helps her pick up a few things.

“Here you go,” he says.

“Thank you so much. Today is just not my day. I’ve been dropping things, spilling things, I am covered in glue and glitter,” she says finally looking up, and locking eyes with the handsome stranger.

An instant spark ignites.

Maggie’s captivated. Ricky is intrigued.

“Do you need a lift somewhere?” he says pointing to his motorcycle.

Maggie notices.

“Oh gosh. (Laughing) I better not. Motorcycles terrify me.”

“Hmm. All the more reason to do it. Who knows you might just enjoy it.”

“I don’t know. We’re strangers,” Maggie says mentally kicking herself for not jumping at the opportunity.

Ricky smirks, thinking for a beat.

“I’m Ricky,” he says extending his hand.

Maggie looks up at him.

“And you are?” Ricky says with a sexy expectant smile.

Maggie’s heart flutters.

“Maggie,” she says shaking his hand.

They lock eyes at the powerful feeling of contact and connection.

“It’s nice to meet you Maggie, see now we’re not strangers anymore.”

Maggie lets out a nervous giggle as she pulls her hand away.

Ricky’s heart skips a beat.

“I’m sorry I just don’t think this is a smart idea…” Maggie says.

“Come on, I don’t bite. Live a little.” Ricky says his eyebrow cocking up as his head jerks over toward his motorcycle.

“Ok. Fine. You’re on. But just to be clear, no tricks ok, it’s my first time on a motorcycle.”

“Don’t worry. I’m a very safe driver, I’ll be gentle.”

Maggie blushes as she laughs.

Ricky smiles flirtatiously as he shows her the path to his bike.

Ricky puts her bags into a back tank, and gets on the bike.

“Hop on,” he says.

“Ok….Uh…” Maggie says nervously looking at the bike.

“Just grab onto my waist and swing your leg over.”

Maggie does so and gets on the bike.

“There you go,” he says with a smile of confidence.

“That wasn’t so bad,” Maggie says laughing.

Ricky gives Maggie a helmet as he puts his on as well.

Maggie wraps her hands around his waist.

Ricky looks down, he smiles.

“You ready?” He asks.


“Hold on tight Maggie this is gonna be fun.” He says revving his bike, waiting for the light to turn green. As it does he speeds off and Maggie squeals.

-End of flashback-


The DJ starts to play a familiar song.

Maggie and Ricky smile at each other.

Ricky: May I have this dance love?

Maggie takes his hand as they sway in each other’s arms.

Maggie holds him tightly as she looks at her ring, she smiles happily.

Ricky: Thank you.

Maggie pulls away and looks up at him.

Maggie: For what?

Ricky: For walking into my life, at the perfect moment. You changed me for the better. You woke me up.

Maggie: You woke me up too. Besides, the foundation was pretty much intact, I just did a little fine tuning. (She says smiling up at him.)

Ricky: No, it was a lot more than that, so thank you.

Maggie: Thanks for the ride. It’s been a hell of one.

Ricky: Well hold on tight baby, we’ve got a long way to go, (he says smiling down at her, pulling her closer to him.)

Maggie smiles and kisses him.

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-The End-

There you have it, the Love Conflicted journey is over. It’s been fun. I hope those of you who have read along, enjoyed the love story between Ricky and Maggie and Lily and Ian.

Stay Tuned for a Love Conflicted inspired “Soundtrack” & my author’s commentary! COMING SOON!

Thanks for reading!

 *I do not take credit for any images used in my edits, or otherwise.*












Love Conflicted- Chapter 11


Maggie & Ricky and the gang have missed you!

Stay Tuned for this week’s concluding portions of Love Conflicted.

This is a long one so hopefully it makes up for the many weeks that have gone by without any updates. I will say just a quick NOTATION- this chapter is on the sexier side due to the language and the actions of the characters. It’s nothing R-rated but I just like to give a little notice in case there are any younger viewers. So let’s get into the budding yet overly complicated love story between Ricky & Maggie that is  Love Conflicted.

Previously on Love Conflicted…

Read Part 10 HERE

Start from the Beginning/Get Caught up HERE


Ricky is hard at work uncovering some much needed evidence at his work station in his dimly lit hotel room.

A knock is heard.

Ricky gets up quietly and checks the peephole.

Ian salutes him.

Ricky opens the door.

Ricky: Hey thanks for coming, are the girls okay?

Ricky steps aside as Ian walks into the room.

Ian: Of course. Do you think I’d leave if they weren’t?

Ricky: Of course not. Reflex question. Sorry.

Ian: Hey you’re in love, I’ll let it slide.

Ian smirks, patting him on the shoulder

Ian: So whatta we got?

Ian says taking off his jacket and sitting down beside Ricky’s work station.

Ricky: Cobbs has somethings he’s been hiding from the rest of the gang.

Ian leans over to the computer screen and takes a look.

Ian: Well, well, well looks like our boss man hasn’t been as careful as we thought… all this time he’s…

Ricky: We’ve basically been taking orders from one of America’s Most Wanted.

Ian: How did you get this? I mean this record had to be sealed?

Ricky: Did I mention, I started off as a hacker? I can’t believe it took me this long to figure this shit out!

Ian: Well years of having the code drilled into our heads will do that to you. Why didn’t any of these charges stick?

Ricky: He probably paid off judges, I’m sure he has plenty on retainer.

Ian: Cobbs isn’t who he says he is.

Ricky: That’s for damn sure.

Ian: Holy shit.

Ian covers his mouth in shock, coming to grips with this daunting realization.

Ian: How is this even possible? I mean we could be sent to prison for the shit he made us do. Protecting national security my ass. He was full of it. This isn’t CIA shit, this is lethal, corrupt, hit man shit. Rick, man we can’t get caught in this mess. I’m not giving any more of my life for that guy. Let alone, go to prison.

Ricky: That’s not going to happen. Not if we get to the police before it’s too late.

Ian: Who’s to say they’ll even believe us?

Ricky: Oh they will, my life depends on it. Both of ours do. Besides, maybe if we give them full cooperation they’ll be able to cut us a deal. Grant us full immunity. I mean we have him. This is the smoking gun.

Ian: You do know that if this doesn’t go our way, and we get sent away- Maggie…

Ricky: You don’t have to bother finishing that sentence, ok? Trust me, I know. She’s all I can think about. That’s why we have to do everything in our power not to let that happen.

Ian: Well we have proof that our boss was a corrupted piece of shit who embezzled millions of dollars, not to mention all the illegal drugs I’m sure he smuggled in.

Ricky: Yea and all the blood on his hands. That’s enough to put him away for a long long time. I just don’t get it though. All the assignments we’ve had over the years. We thought we were taking out the bad guys.

Ian: Meanwhile, we’ve been working for one this whole damn time. And for what? What’s the reason for all the bloodshed? Money, power…

Ricky: Greed? Lack of humanity. Kill for the cash.

Ian and Ricky share a sigh of grief.

Ian: How did we get here Rick?

Ricky: I ask myself that question every single day. You know all these years, I told myself we were protecting the world. Taking out the people who could cause innocent people their lives. I convinced myself that we were actually doing good. And then I meet this girl and she has the biggest heart. And the sweetest soul and if I tell you the way she looked at me after she found out what I did for a living. I knew something was wrong with me. With this situation. And I realized that I can’t let this be my life. Not anymore.

Ian: Maggie certainly has had a positive effect on you.

Ricky: I need you to promise me something.

Ian looks at his friend expectantly with a nod.

Ricky: If something happens…to me…

Ian: Nothing is going to happen. You just said so yourself.

Ricky: (gives him a stern glance) If anything happens, if I have to go away, or worse. Promise me, you’ll look after Maggie.

Ian: Dude.

Ian shakes his head, not wanting to think about the dreaded possible outcome.

Ricky: Please.

Ian: Ricky, it wouldn’t be only on you. I’ve been on this job with you. I’ve done shit I’m not proud of either, trust me.

Ricky: No you haven’t. You just drove the getaway car. Played security guard.

Ian: You know that’s a lie. We’re partners.

Ricky: Maybe so. But it’s what I’m gonna say. You’re not going away for this. You were helping me out. You’ve always been there to help me out.

Ian: Rick, man, just stop okay. We’re a team.

Ricky: Promise me, please? (he holds his hand out) I need to know that she’ll be okay.

Ian: I promise. There. You happy?

Ricky smirks and Ian shakes his friend’s hand

Ricky: Thank you.

Ian: Nothing’s happening to you though. That girl has been through too much of your bullshit to get the short end of the stick this late in the game….So…what do you wanna do?

Ricky: We have to be smart about this. Cobbs can’t know what’s coming. The element of surprise is all we have here.

Ian: Are you thinking about going to the cops straight away?

Ricky: He knows cops, he can see them coming a mile away.

Ian: So then…what other choice do we really have? Go after him ourselves?

Ricky: Yea. We have two very sexy and persuasive women in our corner.

Ricky’s eyebrows raise as he smirks. Ian realizing and smiling in return.

Ian: I’ll drive.

Ricky jumps up and grabs his bag of spy equipment as they head out the door.


Maggie and Lily sit in Maggie’s apartment as they watch a movie.

Maggie’s mind is going a mile a minute as she wonders where Ricky and Ian are and if they are okay.

She sits stiffly on the coach as she bites her nails looking off in a daze.

Lily notices.

Lily: Is something wrong?

Maggie: What? No. I’m fine.

Lily: Really because if you continue chowing down, you won’t have any nails left.

Lily smacks her hand away from her lips.

Maggie bites her lip nervously as she checks her phone for the 50th time.

Lily: What’s going on Maggie?

Maggie: Ok. I have to tell you something, but you have to promise me that you won’t tell a single soul.

Lily: Okay.

Maggie: I’m serious Lil, like nobody.

Lily: When have I ever betrayed your trust?

Maggie looks at her knowingly.

Maggie’s phone rings.

She jumps up, answering it.

Maggie: Hello?

Ricky: Baby?

Maggie: Hi. (she lets out the breath she’s been holding in)

Ricky: Hey.

Maggie: Where are you? Are you okay?

Lily watches her friend pace the living room.

Ricky: Yes I’m fine. We’re fine. Ian and I are on our way to you. We got something babe. And it’s big. But we need your help.

Maggie: (laughs) I thought you’d never ask.

Ricky: (laughs) How are you? Are you okay? Lily?

Maggie: I’ve been better. I’ll be good once I see your face.

Ricky: You and me both love.

Maggie smiles.

Lily begins to catch on as she notices the tone in Maggie’s voice and the goofy grin on her face.

Lily’s wheels are turning as she watches Maggie talk on the phone. Her jaw drops as she gasps.

Maggie notices.

Maggie: So I’ll see you soon?

Ricky: Yup.

Maggie: You know Lily is here, right?

Lily narrows her eyes at her.

Maggie gives her a face of apology.

Ricky: Yea. Go ahead. Tell her. We’re gonna need her help too.

Maggie: Okay. Bye. I love you.

Ricky: I love you babe. Bye.

Ricky hangs up as Ian turns onto Maggie’s block, taking the back streets.

Maggie looks at Lily who seems angry.

Maggie: So…that thing that I wanted to tell you…

Lily: Yea? (She folds her arms across her chest)

Maggie: Ricky’s alive. He had to fake his death to protect himself from his psycho boss, and by extension he had to protect me and by extension was protecting you too since you’re always with me anyway. So I mean there’s the silver lining right?

Maggie rattles off as she nervously looks at her friend.

Lily: Why wouldn’t you tell me?

Maggie: He’s in hiding. I couldn’t risk it.

Lily: Haven’t you learned you can trust me, by now. We’ve been friends our whole lives. Here I am thinking you lost the love of your life. And it was all a game. I tell ya you put on quite a performance.

Maggie: Trust me, Lil. It was not a performance. I really did think he was dead. All the tears were real.

Lily: So how long did you actually know he was alive?

Maggie: Since I went back to work. A few days.

Lily: A few days? Maggie I am your best friend. Seeing you so hurt and in so much pain, was heart breaking. I wish you would have just come to me and told me the truth.


Ian and Ricky sit in the car, listening to their conversation.

Ian pulls into an alley.

Ricky has sunglasses and a hat on.

Ricky: Let’s just give them a minute.

Ian: Well now it just feels like we’re spying.

Ricky: Hey if that’s the worst thing we do today, I’ll consider that a great deal of progress.

Ian: True.


Maggie: Lily I am so sorry. I have been a nervous wreck these past few days. Trust me when Ricky came to see me, I nearly fainted.

Lily: So he was here?

Maggie: Yes.

Lily: So he did risk going out in public. So really what was the point of hiding this from me?

Maggie: He found out about the false positive on the pregnancy test. He said he had to see me, he had to be with me. But he didn’t stay long. He couldn’t. For both our sakes.

Lily: How did he find out about the false positive?

Maggie: Um. There’s a bug under the lamp shade. I guess he overheard it when we were talking.

Lily looks under the lamp shade, seeing the small mic.

Lily looks at Maggie with a dumbfounded look, leaning towards it.

Lily: Hey… hey I’m talking to you two in spy land. What the hell is going on?

Maggie: Lily…

Lily: So we’re in that much danger here? That your boyfriend had to fake his own death and have his partner bug your apartment to keep you safe?

Maggie: Apparently the business is really shady.

Lily: I can’t believe this. So we’ve just been sitting ducks this whole time?

Maggie: No. Ian has been here with us. Protecting us.

Lily: Oh please. Where is Ian now? I swear that guy is the worst body guard ever.

It’s Lily’s turn to pace now.

There’s a small light knock on the door.

Maggie and Lily exchange looks.


Maggie: That’s them. Did I mention they were on their way?

Lily: Oh no. You didn’t.

Maggie rushes over to the door, peeking in the peephole first, before opening it.

Ricky: Did you look in the peep hole before opening the door?

Maggie: Of course.

Ricky: That’s my girl, get over here.

Maggie smiles, as Ricky grabs her into a hug.

Ian: I uh suggest we move this into an enclosed area.

Maggie: Of course. Come in.

Lily stands there. Arms folded. Obviously annoyed.

Ricky: Hey Lil.

Lily: Whatta know. You’re alive. It’s a miracle.

Ricky: Lily. I’m so sorry.

Lily: Are you out of your mind? Do you know what you put her through? What you put me through? Having to try to be strong for her, when I was grieving in my own way. You’re my friend too.

Ian watches on with sympathetic eyes.

Maggie’s eyes begin to tear.

Ricky: Lily, I have no words. I’m so sorry. It was stupid I know. But it was the only way I thought I could keep everyone safe. I’m the one they were after. So if I wasn’t around then, they couldn’t use either of you as retaliation. It wasn’t personal. It wasn’t that we don’t trust you.

Lily: I hate being lied to. You both know that. (She looks between both Maggie and Ricky) Everyone in this room knew what was going on, except for me. You left me in the dark. Please, don’t ever do that again.

Ricky: It won’t happen ever again.

Maggie: We promise.

Lily: Ok. Good.

Maggie: Are we…okay?

Lily: Of course we are.

Maggie hugs her friend tightly.

Maggie: I really am so sorry. You know that alive or not, not having Ricky in my life has been really hard. And you somehow managed to make things okay. Like you always do. I couldn’t get through this life without you Lil.

Lily: Ditto.

Lily hugs Maggie again.

Ricky: Do I get a hug?

Lily: Sure. Why the hell not? If nothing else, I’m glad you’re not dead.

Ricky: Aw you’re so sweet to me.

Ricky smiles holding his arms open as Lily hugs him.

Lily: I really am glad you’re safe.

Ricky: Thanks Lil. Thanks for always believing in us, (he says pulling Maggie over to him and kissing the top of her head) And for being the best friend we could ever ask for.

Lily: Oh well what a love fest.

Everyone laughs. Ian smiles, admiring Lily from afar.

Maggie: So what’d you guys find out? What’s the plan?

Lily: Pause.

Everyone looks at her.

Lily: Go be in love for the night.

Maggie and Ricky exchange glances.

Lily: Whatever plan you have can wait until the morning. I know you two haven’t really spent much time together.

Maggie and Ricky lock eyes, as he smirks, she blushes.

Ricky extends his hand.

Ricky: Shall we?

Maggie takes it as they walk into her bedroom.


Ricky and Maggie get into her room, and Ricky closes the door.

Ricky: I’ve been dying to kiss you. Come here.

Ricky pulls her to him, as he kisses her.

Maggie kissing him back, she wraps her hands around his neck.

Ricky’s hands make their way up her shirt, Maggie stops him, pulling away.

Maggie: Ricky we can’t…not with them in the next room.

Ricky: Are you kidding me? They expect it. Trust me.

Maggie: I don’t care if they expect it. That doesn’t mean it should happen.

Ricky: I’m sorry. Are you telling me, you don’t wanna do this? Do you know how much I’ve missed you?

Maggie: Yea I can imagine. I’ve missed you so much. Of course I want this. I just don’t think it’s appropriate.

Ricky: Our current situation really doesn’t leave much room for appropriate behavior.

Maggie: Baby I just can’t. I’d feel so uncomfortable.

Ricky: Ok fine. But just know that I am doing everything in my power right now, not to rip your clothes off.

Maggie laughs.

Maggie: Well thank you, I’m so proud of your restraint.

Ricky laughs.

Ricky: Kiss me, at least.

Maggie: (narrows her eyes at him) I don’t know. Do you think you can handle that? Could be a gateway drug for you.

Ricky: (laughs) That’s not exactly untrue. But you gotta give me something here, baby.

Maggie smiles and pulls him into a kiss, as he pulls her closer to him, kissing her back.


Ian and Lily sit on opposite ends of the couch, in silence.

Ian looks away up at the ceiling as his uncomfortable level begins to rise.

Ian: They’re having sex aren’t they?

Lily: Oh yea. Really strong possibility. (Lily nods)

Ian: Fantastic. This won’t be awkward at all.

Lily: TV?

Ian: Dear god, please. I’d really appreciate not having to hear anything.

Lily: You and me both.

Lily turns the TV on.

Ian: In all fairness you did kind of set the ball in motion telling them to be all in love for the night.

Lily: Well considering I’m sure whatever plan you both have up your sleeves in going to be either A) ridiculously stupid or B) extremely complicated and time consuming, I figured they deserved a night together. They’ve spent so much time apart.

Ian: You are absolutely right.

Lily looks over at him.

Lily: Hmm. I like the sound of that.

Ian laughs.

Ian: I’m sorry you didn’t know the full story. I know that we don’t know each other and you probably don’t care, or need an apology from me. But I was a part of this whole thing. And I just want you to know we weren’t trying to make a fool out of you or disrespect you in any way.

Lily: It’s ok. Thank you. I know you were just doing your job.

Ian: According to you, I don’t really do it that well.

Lily: (laughs) I only said that because I was angry and I knew you were listening.

Ian: Ah.

Lily smiles.

Ian: I don’t like being lied to either. So I get it.

Lily: Yea being lied to sucks. Especially when the guy who claims to love you, continues to cheat on you with every available woman.

Ian looks at her stunned.

Lily: Sorry. I just dumped my garbage right in your lap, didn’t I?

Ian: No that’s okay. I’m sorry that happened to you. That guy is a fool.

Lily: I was the fool. For believing him. When in my gut, I knew.

Ian: He’s the fool for not realizing what he had.

Lily: (smiles) Thank you.

Ian: You know, that explains a lot. About why you are the way you are.

Lily: What does that mean?

Ian: Just that you seem overly independent. You don’t want to rely on anyone to take care of you.

Lily: Well I don’t have to. I can take care of myself.

Ian: I can tell.

Lily: Don’t sit here and analyze me.

Ian: That’s not what I’m doing.

Lily: Then what are you doing?

Ian: I’m trying to get to know you. Sure you’re gorgeous and funny and captivating. But there’s certainly more to the sassy blonde routine you like to put on. I wanna know what makes you tick.

Lily: Do you?

Ian: Yea, (he smiles.)

Lily: Really?

Ian: Yes.

Lily leans closer and stares into his eyes, trying to read him. Judging if he’s being sincere.

Ian: What are you doing?

Lily smiles and pulls him to her as she kisses him, Ian cups her face, kissing her back.


Ricky and Maggie are now lying on her bed as they continue kissing.

Ricky’s kisses become more intense as his hands begin to roam over Maggie’s body.

Maggie pulls away.

Maggie: Ricky.

Ricky kisses her again.

Maggie: Ricky.

Ricky looks at her.

Ricky: I’m sorry. My self-restraint is fading fast, (he says rolling away from her and standing up, slightly out of breath.) Come on babe. It’s been days. I want to touch you. Scratch that, I need to.

Maggie smiles and shakes her head, as she begins to turn 7 shades of red.

Maggie: You know what when this is all over, I promise you and I will go away for a whole week and we won’t even have to leave our hotel room.

Ricky’s eyes light up, as he raises his eyebrow. A smirk forming on his lips.

Ricky: Now that sounds amazing.

Ricky says grabbing her by the shirt and pulling her into a kiss.

Maggie smiles against his lips before pushes him away gently.

Maggie: But for now. You’re gonna have to work on that restraint of yours.

Ricky: Then you better but a freakin’ barrier between the two of us, if you expect me to stay away from you.

Maggie: Let’s just go back outside.

Ricky: Yea a few extra pairs of eyes may keep me a bay, for now. (he smirks)

Maggie laughs as she opens the door she sees, Lily and Ian kissing on the couch.

Maggie’s jaw drops.

Lily lifts her shirt off as Ian begins to unbutton his.

Ricky: Babe what’s up?

Maggie: Shh. (she puts her finger to her lips as she points to them)

Ricky looks over her shoulder as his jaw drops too.

Maggie shuts the door.


Ricky: I called that from day one.

Maggie: Oh my gosh. Lily must really like him.

Ricky: Well I can tell you, he definitely likes her.

Maggie: Ugh I knew he did. I could totally tell. What has he been saying about her?

Ricky: Oh you know just the usual. He thinks she’s amazing and beautiful and unlike any other woman he’s ever met.

Maggie: Oh that whole spiel?

Ricky smiles as he wraps his arms around her waist.

Ricky: I know what you’re doing?

Maggie: What?

Ricky: Trying to distract me.

Maggie: From what?

Ricky: Well considering the reason we aren’t naked in that bed right now is due to the fact that you were so embarrassed and concerned that they would hear, and now they are the ones doing the deed. And barely know there’s any life around them. You have no excuse anymore.

Maggie smiles covering her face.

Ricky: Come on, let me show you how much I missed you.

Maggie kisses him as he smiles.

Ricky lifts her up  heading for the bed, as she squeals.


Ian and Lily continue kissing as Lily reaches for Ian’s belt buckle.

Ian stops her.

Ian: We should stop. (he says pulling away)

Lily: That is the stupidest idea, you’ve ever had.

Ian: I really like you.

Lily: I’m getting that. Come here. (she cups his face again as she kisses him)

Ian pulls away again.

Ian: I don’t think that you do.

Lily looks at him confused.

Ian: I like you a lot. I can’t stop thinking about you and your sassy little walk and your flirty little banter and your incredible brain. I love how you now without fail trust your gut. How you speak your mind. How you sugarcoat nothing. You are a strong powerhouse of a woman. I wouldn’t dream of ever tainting that. It’s your sexiest trait. And considering what a knockout you are, that’s saying a lot.

Lily looks at him, her heart pounding in her chest.

Ian: Ever since I met you, you have continuously called me on my crap and every time I realize more and more that I could do this forever.

Lily: Do what?

Ian: Do this. (he gestures between them.) I could fight with you forever. I could talk with you forever. I could watch you forever. I could love you… forever.

Lily: You don’t even know me.

Ian: I know you enough to know that you’re worth fighting for. And you’re more than just sex. If we do this now, it’s going to send you the wrong message about what I want us to be.

Lily looks at him her head spinning.

Lily: Are you a real human, or some robot? You’re turning down sex?

Ian: For now. (He cups her face and kisses her tenderly)

Lily: What is it that you want, exactly?

Ian: Same thing you want. But you’re just too afraid to admit.

Lily leans in and kisses him again.

Ian feels something shift, there’s not so much of an urgency as there is a feeling of trust.

He kisses her back for a bit and then pulling away he looks at her with a smile.

Ian: Can I take you out on a date?

Lily: Considering you’ve already partially gotten me out of my clothes I would say it’s the least you could do. (she narrows her eyes at him as she laughs)

Ian laughs.

Ian: After this whole thing. We’ll pick a Saturday. But I’m warning you now, be ready because I plan to sweep you off your feet.

Lily: You kind of already are.

Ian smiles as he rises his eyebrows is surprise.

Lily: Yea I said it. I heard myself.

Ian smiles.

Ian: Come here. (He cups her face and kisses her one more time.)

They redress themselves as they snuggle up and find a movie to watch on TV.


Maggie and Ricky lay in bed, tangled up in each other. Maggie’s hands tussling in Ricky’s hair as Ricky wraps his arms around her body, as he continues to kiss her passionately.

Ricky: I love you so much, he whispers into her ear.

Maggie moves closer to him as she kisses him.

Maggie: I love you too. (She says pulling away and looking up into his eyes as she cups his face.)

They lean into another kiss.


The next morning both couples wake in each other’s embrace.

Ricky: Hey you.

Maggie: Hi.

Ricky kisses her softly on the lips..

Maggie: I’m gonna need to recover. Last night was kind of unbelievable.

Ricky: Yea well, I had a lot of time to make up for.

He kisses her as he rolls over positioning himself on top of her.

Maggie: You’ve got to be kidding me? Ricky! (She laughs)

Ricky: What can I say, I can’t help myself. (He kisses her as she giggles.)


Ian: Morning.

He stands in the kitchen making breakfast and coffee, as a very tired Lily surfaces from the couch.

Lily: Good morning.

Ian: Coffee?

Lily: Oh god yes.

Ian: You didn’t get much sleep either huh?

Lily: Nope. Not with those animals going at it all night.

Ian: Yea that was not exactly the best night’s sleep I ever had. Although I will say I did enjoy waking up next to you.

Lily smiles as he hands her a cup of coffee.

Ian: I could do that forever too.

Lily: You know I’m trying to decipher if you’re just really good at flirting and throwing out one liners or if you actually mean these things.

Ian: I thought we covered that last night.

Lily: Guys will say anything.

Ian: To get in your pants yea. I agree. We can be pigs. But I recall I was the one who stopped us last night.

Lily: So what do you want a cookie?

Ian: Yes, yes I do.

He laughs.

Lily laughs and takes a chocolate chip cookie and feeds it to him as he cooks breakfast.

Ian: Thank you. (he mumbles as they share a sweet look)

Lily: You’re welcome, (she says leaning over and kissing him.)

Ian wraps his hands around her as she leans against the counter. He continues deepening their kisses.

Lily pulls away.

Lily: What happened to waiting? Are you finally showing your true colors?

Ian: Waiting doesn’t mean I can’t kiss you like crazy.

Lily: That is true.

Ian smiles as he kisses her again.


Maggie and Ricky emerge from the bedroom, basking in their afterglow.

Maggie: Good morning.

Lily: I bet it is.

Ricky smiles.

Maggie: Please tell me, you guys were too busy having sex, that you weren’t hearing us have sex?

Lily: Look at me Maggie. Do I look happy?

Maggie: Kind of.

Maggie: Do I look sex happy?

Ian and Ricky exchange looks.

Ian: Sex happy?

Maggie: You don’t look sex happy. Oh my god, you heard us?

Lily: All night long. It was like a Lionel Richie song.

Maggie: I am so sorry. I tried to keep him away from me. (she covers her face in embarrassment.)

Ricky: I’m not even sorry.

Ian high fives Ricky.

Lily rolls her eyes at them.

Maggie: This is so awkward. I’m sorry.

Lily: I am exhausted not from a sexy romp in the sack but from being kept up all night by you two. So…therefore I am going to change your sheets and take nap. While you three come up with whatever plan you need to come up with. Ok? Ok.

She walks into the bedroom, shutting the door behind her.

Ian: So I’m guessing she’s not a morning person?

Ricky shakes his head no.

Maggie: She gets super angry if she doesn’t get a good night’s sleep. Take notes.

Ricky: Yea buddy take notes.

Ian looks at them and looks away.

Maggie: Are you really gonna play coy with us right now. You guys didn’t have sex?

Ian: We did not.

Ricky: Well I mean last we saw, you guys were on your way there.

Ian: I stopped it. I really like her. I don’t want this to start off on the wrong foot.

Maggie: I think that’s very smart Ian. Lily’s going to really respect that.

Ian: And I mean we may or may not be going on a date soon.

Ricky: What? Atta boy. Hell yes. It’s about time.

Maggie: Oh my gosh! Yay! I think you guys are going to be perfect together. Lily can be very strong headed and it takes a strong secure man to understand where she’s coming from. I think you’re just her type.

Ian: (laughs) Thank you.

Maggie: And you make breakfast. Oh my gosh, aren’t you perfection.

Ian smiles and hands her a plate of food.

Ricky looks at her..

Ricky: Oh okay I see how it is. You can have your way with me all night and then some guy makes you breakfast and now I’m chopped liver.

Maggie: (Shrugs) Essentially yes.

Maggie and Ricky laugh as he pulls her into a kiss.

Maggie: So what’s this plan?

The guys exchange looks.

To be continued…

*I do not take credit for any images used in my edits or otherwise.*



How I styled Lilac lipstick…


Products used, & and a little bit of Tori Kelly fangirlin’ #herfirstmagazinecover


This eye shadow trio from wet n wild is called “I’m Getting Sunburned.” I thought these colors were so gorgeous and it was only about $4 in the drugstore, so I thought why not? The application was pretty self explanatory- the goldish/copper color is for the eyelid, the darker brown color is for the crease, and then the purple/pink color is for the brow bone. I basically just followed that guideline. I also dragged the copper gold color under my lower lash line and placed some in the inner corners of my eyes to brighten up these sleepy eyes of mine. Then I added some mascara, bronzer, blush and filled in my eyebrows. Lastly I added the staple…wet n wild’s velvet matte “Lie Lack” lip color crayon. I actually really like this lip pencil, and the quality of it. I paid about $4 for it in the drugstore as well, and I was pleased with the wear ability of it. I also think you can layer this and get more color out of it. I just did a light layer but it seems like it would build nicely into a darker shade.

I was running late for church and let’s be real my hair was going on it’s second day so it was a bit ragged so I did what any lazy girl in a rush would do, threw some dry shampoo in it and threw it up in a messy bun. I like to pull out some baby hairs on the sides of my face to add more of a messy look to it.



The makeup look was pretty bright, so I wanted the outfit to be a contrast of light and dark pieces. So, I wore black combat boots, black jeans, a black graphic t-shirt, a thin black cardigan, a leopard puffy vest, and a polka dot scarf. I love mixing patterns, I think it works because the colors are similar. Some people may not dig the mix and match vibe, and hey that’s okay. We’re all unique. I was just going to hang out with some friends from high school -a mini reunion of sorts- so I wanted a really comfortable, laid back look.

outfit edit

Would you rock a Lilac lip?

If so, how would you style it, what would you wear it with?

*All images are my own.*


How I styled Blue lipstick…

A few days before New Year’s Eve I remember thinking “I want to wear a really obnoxious color lipstick.” I thought a bright blue would be really, funky and fun for New Years. And I saw this YouTube video and thought, hey why the hell not?

I was just going to hang out with some family, I wasn’t really worried about feeling strange. In fact, I just embraced the freedom the bold color gave me, to strike up a conversation. In fact my grandfather was like “Oh is this a new thing? You look beautiful.” in his heavy Spanish accent. It was kind of hysterical.

This make-up look is very bold and so I thought it needed an edgy outfit to accompany it. I also think this look can work for a night out with friends. You can even swap it out for a funky black dress and some heels to make it fancier.

Here’s my New Year’s Eve look (in mostly crappy cellphone pictures) 😉



Blue lipsticks and hair jewels. Fun Fact: The iron ons were $1 in Mandees. And when they say they last for a week, believe it! I had to fight to get those suckers out, I washed my hair thoroughly 3 times and still had to brush them out with a comb and some conditioner once I got out of the shower. Got my dollars worth that’s for sure. AND the lipsticks were $3 each in a local beauty store. NOT BAD! (I’m dying to go back and by all the other funky colors, like Green and Purple!)

PLEASE EXCUSE– the abundance of weird selfie faces,  you are about to endure, this blue lipstick went to my head. 😉 #alterego



My attempt at a winged eyeliner. Eh. My shadow is made up of a lot of bronze, gold, brown colors, with some black liner on the top and bottom water lines. I layered some gold glitter on top of the black liner on the top water line too. Also some silver glitter for the outer portion of my eyes.


Silver iron on hearts on one side of my hair- I just used a flat iron for this. The directions are included in the package, it’s pretty self explanatory. Although I had curled my hair, so when I had to flat iron the hearts onto my hair, it kind of lost it’s curl. And it was a bit difficult to try and curl it again, while the hearts were in. So I kind of just sprayed it and scrunched it up with my hands, just to get the body back.


Gold Hair Jewels on the other side. These were very easy to apply and to remove. They were just stick ons.


Gosh. So sassy. #missthangovahere

nye 2nye


outfitoutfit 220151231_202008IMG_20160101_123713

Basically I wore black skinny legged pants, a black and white mesh/lace shirt with a cross on it, a black sparkly sequined cardigan, and my funky pair of black and white boots. I paired my outfit with some gold jewelry to accessorize and I don’t know if you can tell by my nails were basically silver, and gold, with gold glittery sparkles.


So I know this isn’t exactly a tutorial. I don’t really put a lot of emphasis on brands, I use what I have and just make it work for me. So you guys can totally do the same. And I don’t really tell you exactly how I did my make-up because I think everyone develops their own style and I’m not even close to beauty guru status, so I’m going to stick with doing things this way. I just watch tutorials on YouTube for tips and tricks. Some of my favorite beauty gurus include Carrie Rad, Ingrid Nielsen, Rachh Loves, Sierra Furtado, LaurDIY, Michelle Reed, TalkBeckyTalk, FleurdeForce, and of course the beautiful Bethany Mota.

This look is just to spark some inspiration for those looking to spice things up for a night on the town or for wherever you choose to go, or whatever you choose to do. Trust me, my parents were kinda like whoa, ok. And, my brother has issues with change, so he had something to say. But I didn’t let it bother me- it was super fun, and I felt kinda extra cool, because I knew it wasn’t about me doing it for attention. It was about me doing something cool and funky for me. I’ll admit I went a little overboard on the makeup and hair, but hey if I’m going to overdo the sparkly on any day, let it be New Year’s Eve, right?

I like to be different. I like to do things that are out of the box when it comes to fashion. I love experimenting. I love dressing up, and being festive for the holiday season. Every holiday you will find me in some kind of festive head dress. It’s fun to be weird, to be funky. I was always the shy girl as kid, and although I’ve come a long way, that still is a part of me. Regardless, I also think I’ve always had this attraction to strange trends and strange patterns, and things like that. I feel like I have a gypsy soul of sorts. I dance to my one drum, that I create the beat for.

Dare to be different. Turn a few heads.

Make 2016, your year to *sparkle*

****QUICK NOTE****

I will say the lipstick held up, and definitely had staying power. But if I ate or drank anything instead of just gradually blending off like regular lipstick, this matte finish kind of streaked and lingered, to the point where I either had to reapply or just take it off completely by wiping it off with a tissue. That was kind of frustrating to be talking and feel like your blue lipstick was all wonky. But never the less, its the price you pay for cheap lipstick, no biggy. I still enjoyed rocking my blue lips. When can I wear them again? 😉


So would you rock blue lips?

*All images are my personal images…(although I stole some from my dad’s camera ;))*


Dear 2016, + Happy 3rd Anniversary!

Every new coming year WordPress sends out the year’s blogging report. It highlights categories like, crunchy numbers (popular posts), posting patterns, attractions, how did they find you? (referring sites,) where are the views coming from? (from around 137 countries total- with most views from The U.S., France and Germany,) and comments from viewers. This year I was blessed to gain new followers, and to finally meet an unconscious goal I’ve had of reaching 100 followers, plus a few extras along the way. I noticed that once I realized I hit 100, I mentally checked it off my list.

Read my Thank You note (and more on that topic) HERE.

I recently noticed that my blog got more traction when I began posting an abundance of short stories/series. And I also realized how effective categorizing and tagging are.

As michelle leigh writes- 3rd Anniversary is coming up tomorrow- January 8th, I decided to dive into the inner workings of this blog and re-evaluate what works and what doesn’t. As the old cliché says; Practice makes perfect. And I truly believe that mlw has come quite a long way since my first post.

Check it out HERE for a Blast from the Past

happy 3 year anniversary

Thank You

I’ve noticed that it’s difficult for me to always come up with something to post on the days I’ve committed myself to; Mondays & Thursdays. For the most part I stuck to this schedule pretty consistently. I think the only time I missed a day that I can actually recall, was on Christmas, but I posted Friday instead. As I saw on my posting patterns, there were a few Sunday, Wednesday and Friday posts along the way, but for the most part the schedule stuck. And I’m pretty damn proud of that fact. It has been really important to me to stick to this schedule to maintain a consistency. But I also want to maintain a credibility and put out worthy content, and not just fillers. Which is something that I think I often struggle with, because inspiration isn’t always consistent. Every writer has their dry spells. However, as I’ve noticed my latest post record has filled me with much more joy. As short stories have been somewhat of a trend for me.

Over the past few years that I’ve had this blog, I usually tell you what we can look forward to in the New Year. I give you a list of things I want to work on, I share my resolutions with you. But this year I’m not going to do that, because the greater the list (and you know I love my lists) the more likely they won’t happen. The list can put the pressure on. So I know there are some things I’d like to do on this blog, ways to improve it, but I think I’m going to keep them to myself and let you be surprised when they happen. No resolutions, just helpful ideas to achieve a better life and by extension- a better blog.

As for the content, there will continue to be short stories, and poetry. And as much as I at times feel like this blog is all over the place with no consistent message, and I would love to just stick solely to sharing stories with you, I do have other interests. Sometimes things will fall into the lifestyle genre, fashion genre or the movie/music review genre.

This reminds me of a story. In college, I had to start a blog for a class. The blog had to center around one thing. I chose music. I love music and I love lyrics and analyzing the meaning behind why an artist writes their words. But being confined to one subject drove me crazy at times. I felt like it limited my creativity. I like the freedom to post what I love and enjoy, despite the subject matter/genre/category.

As I ponder all of this, I am suddenly reminded of the phrase attached to this blog; the phrase written just beneath my blog name; “A safe place for the written word.” That’s the message of this blog. To allow myself (and all of you) to feel welcome to read and write about what we feel is important to the nurture of our souls and spirits.

Obviously I still feel that there are things I’d like to change and work on. There’s always room for improving your craft. And the more you do it, the more confidant you will feel about your ability to do it.

I remember a professor/mentor of mine used to always say, “A draft is never done.” No matter how any times you proof, edit, or rewrite it. And it’s true you can always find ways to change things, to make it better. But you have to write it in the first place.

So as we move forward into the New Year, my hope for this blog, is simply to keep it going. At this moment the schedule will remain the same. But as life changes, it may vary, (but I will always keep you posted.) Things may start to change slowly, but I only wish to strive to make this blog better- more fun, and more interesting to read. So thank you for coming along on this journey. I look forward to all the love stories that are to be written and shared here on michelle leigh writes along with anything else I feel to share. I do hope you stick around. And I thank you again. And let us once again rejoice and say a big…..HAPPY 3 YEAR ANNIVERSARY MLW!!! I am so proud!

Stay Tuned!

(And yes Love Conflicted readers, I WILL finish it, I promise. In the meantime…catch up HERE!)

Love conflicted new posterlove conflicted new poster ft. lily and ian


Follow me on Twitter: @Shellbelle91

*Spoiler Alert: I tweet about television shows for the most part, #LIVETWEETER.







2015 Memory Jar Review


2015 was difficult for me, for some personal reasons, but it was also a year of growth for me. And the more growth I see in myself, the more I am sure I will see being reflected on this blog. Last year for 2015 I started a memory jar, I had seen the idea floating around online and it seemed like something that would be right up my alley. I’m the girl who takes too many pictures. I’m the girl who yells at those who don’t want to take pictures with my famous saying; “Hey, we’re making memories!” I’m the girl who used to spend her middle school years scrapbooking. You can sense a theme, I’m sure.

2015 memory jar

2015, thanks for the memories.

So on New Year’s Day as I sat down to read through all my 2015 memories from my memory jar (pictured above,) I was pleasantly surprised by how much I feel I have grown as a person. From the girl who graduated college about 3 years ago, who has had an ongoing battle with anxiety and breaking into the work world, to the girl who has begun to round a corner this year. And I am thrilled. I may have a long ways to go in finding my career and in other aspects of my life, but my hope for 2016 is to keep this going and to keep growing and learning new things about myself. Learning what I am capable of and to always strive for more, strive to better myself and become a well-rounded person overall.

***Listen as you read: REVIVAL by Selena Gomez (oddly enough this is the song I gravitated toward playing as I edited this. Coincidence? I think not. I got you SelGo. 😉

It’s important to reflect on all the good things you do have, rather than to dwell on all the things you don’t have or all the bad things that happened.

So I bring you

*My 2015 Highlights* (in no particular order.)

The biggest change I have made is taking measures to help deal with my anxiety issues and remaining grounded in difficult life situations, and understanding that feeling emotion is okay and so is showing emotion. I’m not going to dive into specifics, but I have seen an improvement in myself.

Looking at my religious faith with stronger eyes than I used to and attending church more freely. I say this not because I used to be forced to go, because I wasn’t. But I use the world freely because I feel a stronger connection to God, because my outlook on life is slowly maturing in understanding. I realize that I will question him sometimes, when things feel really bad but still trust in him and still understand that the gospel readings are there to show insight. And in some way or another they will relate to your life and can help guide you.


Photo By: Robert DeSantos Jr.

My 2015 started the same way my 2016 started; with a New Year’s Day dinner with my family. (2016 we even added a game night, we had a blast and laughed a ton!)

family dinner

My god daughter has created her own nickname for me, and it stuck. To her I am “Shem.”


The year also started off with a reunion dinner with some old friends!


My brother got engaged! (Yes I was in attendance, I was in charge of the photos as I snapped through shaking hands/legs and happy tears!)


My future sister in law asked me to be a bridesmaid, and we found her wedding dress! (Yes I was also in attendance, I was in charge of capturing the experience for my brother to watch later on down the line.)


I got back into video for a short bit, as I directed, edited and shot a yoga video for my cousin’s holistic class. It came out pretty awesome and her presentation was a hit because of it!

michelle leigh writes turned 2!-READ POST

I re-decorated my own room.


– Joy Williams ❤

Took mom to brunch for Mother’s Day!


I went on a few job interviews, some went better than others, and some job opportunities were a lesson learned.

I got an intern position at a local newspaper and have been there for a few months. Although it’s newswriting, I am learning to be in a work environment, and part of a team. I am also learning to deal with new situations that aren’t exactly in my comfort zone. With responsibility comes more independence. Seeing my By-line is always a nice feeling too. 🙂

I saw 50 Shades of Grey with some friends and became slightly obsessed, after reading all three books in a matter of a few weeks, I was eagerly awaiting this film.

50 shades

Jesse Lee Soffer (Chicago PD) favorited my tweet. I gotta say my celebrity twitter game was on fire this year. Marina Squerciati (Chicago PD) is like my bestie on twitter for live tweet Wednesdays. She answers me all the time!


Dressed up in theme on several occasions; my goddaughter’s farm themed birthday party, my cousin’s 80’s themed birthday party, flapper inspired look for my birthday dinner. You guys know I love a good theme.

80's party

My good friend Jenny got engaged and asked me to be her maid of honor!


Had a mother/daughter date night with my mom and our best friends.

mom dates

I’ve noticed I’m writing more, whether its news related for work, or my own creative stories. It’s been more consistent as of late. [SEE: Love Conflicted, A Broken Heart For Christmas, For Old Times’ Sake, What are you doing New Year’s Eve?] I also wrote two short scripts; both horror based; One was an extension of a zombie short I wrote a while back, called “Inhumane” and the other is called “Head Over Heels.”

Between all the upcoming weddings I have been to bridal showcases, and a taste testing, supporting special people in my life, in preparation of their big day.

Glenn survived on The Walking Dead! This was a whirlwind for me, because I am a huge TV junkie and I take my love of characters seriously.


The Walking Dead Went Too Far

My Glenn/The Walking Dead Theory

The Glenn Mystery Continues with New Revelations…

Send up Green Balloons for Glenn!

glenn alive

I found out my best friend is going to be an Aunt! Her brother is my brother’s best friend and we are all really close. At their Fourth of July celebration, they announced the exciting news. Later on she also found out she’s going to be a God mother too! Baby meatball is due soon! Welcome to the godmother club love! So excited for you! ❤

aunt best friend

Gym, Haircuts, Lunch & Shopping day with two of my favorite ladies; my Mom and my Aunt. I was obsessed with my short hair and am considering that once we hit spring, I may have to chop it off again.


My best friend took me to this really adorable tea place in the city; Alice’s Tea Cup as my birthday gift. You guys know how I love my tea.


My goddaughter gave me the sweetest, most thoughtful gift for Christmas. A tea mug, a diffuser, an assortment of loose leaf teas, and on the tea mug she drew some art work as it also read “World’s Best Godmother!” I couldn’t imagine getting a more perfect gift, from a more special person. Thank you babe!

I began spending more time with both sides of my family, which is really important to me. Sometimes time gets away from us, and we don’t allow room to spend time with everyone.


I went to the mermaid parade with my mom and dressed like a mermaid. Can you see how I enjoy dressing up and being weird?

I went out one night for my friend’s birthday to an 80’s club and it was a blast. As you may know I’m not one for bars and clubs. I’m a “let’s watch a movie and eat junk food, stay at home grandma,” but some nights I’ll put the heels on and the makeup and act my age. It’s a rare occurrence, but it was a great time with great music, and great people.

I hosted a Girls Gala for Valentine’s Day.

I won a massive Trader Joe’s basket at a card party! And a few other things too, it was super exciting. Things like that rarely happen to me, but I was on a roll!

trader joe's basket

For my family birthday dinner, I had breakfast for dinner. I love breakfast foods!

Bethany Joy Lenz favorited and answered my tweet, and Joy Williams favorited and answered my tweets too! Seriously I’m such a fan of both of these women, so this was like huge for me! Lol.

I survived my first Jury Duty experience. (See you in 8 years mothatruckas!) 😉

Ugly sweaters and t-shirts in honor of my Aunt Mary, this Christmas. Everyone came out and really rallied in remembering a woman who truly made an impact on our lives with her crazy sense of humor.


Photo By: Robert DeSantos Jr.

Rocked Blue Lips on the very last day of the year- New Year’s Eve. Dare to be different. Turn a few heads.

I’ve learned that I control my social media, my social media doesn’t control me. In other words, I post less frequently than I used to. And I’m ok with that.

Joy Williams’ “Venus” album kind of became my anthem, along with some really good Yoga music. (Helps with traveling anxiety if you’re wondering.) *I recommend- Woman (Oh Mama), Not Good Enough, What a Good Woman Does, and Welcome Home.

williams 2

Justin Timberlake became a DAD!

So there you have it. I know some things aren’t huge successes, or are not in direct relation to me, but I’m a believer in making the simple little things shine through. Those little things become the big things, and supporting others in my life means a lot to me too.

Looking back at all my 2015 memories made me realize how much can happen over the course of a year. I think that the idea of starting a memory jar is great, everyone should give it a try! I already started mine! It’s not too late, the new year is just beginning. Who are you going to be? What are you going to do? Where are you going to go? It’s all a mystery. Enjoy it!

Happy and Healthy New Year to you all.

I truly hope 2016 is your best year yet!