Love Conflicted- Chapter 5

Previously on Love Conflicted…LC poster

Read Part 4 HERE

Maggie’s apartment is a little brighter somehow. Maybe it’s because the shades are finally open or maybe it’s the presence of a friend to hold her hand during this heartbreaking time. Lily sits aside her on the couch.talking

Maggie: I don’t know Lil, something in me just can’t comprehend this. I feel like it’s not real. Half the time I can’t even get out of bed, and when I do well this is what I look like. It’s indescribable, how bad this hurts.

Lily knowingly nods and takes her friend’s hand.

Lily: Why don’t we take a walk? I’ll buy you lunch. The fresh air and carbs will do you good.

Maggie:(shrugging) Ok. Yea.

Lily: Yea?

Maggie: I’ve been living off of cereal. So…

Lily: Well then I think it’s time we change that, huh? Come on. I got ya.

Lily pulls Maggie into a side hug and leads her toward the door.walking

Maggie and Lily walk down the street toward a little coffee house. Its mid-day approaching night fall. People are walking about; busy and having places to go and people to see. Maggie hasn’t seen outdoors let alone any actual sunlight in a week. Her mind is still housing an out of body foggy feeling. But she can’t deny that it did feel good to be out. Maggie breathes in the fresh air, as her heart beats a little steadier having a friend in this.

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Lily ushers her into the coffee house, but as she does something wills her to take a scan of her surroundings. She notices a few parked cars, all vacant except one. She thinks for a brief second that it’s odd but then returns her attention to Maggie as they walk into the coffee house.

Coffee houseLily and Maggie are seated. And have ordered some Paninis and coffee.

Maggie looks around her eyes adjusting to the world again.

“Could she even do something like that, adjust to a world that Ricky is no longer a part of?”  She thinks, as she sips her coffee.

Maggie: You know even so, even after I got that call, I still felt…I feel  like he’s somehow still out there, and I know that sounds crazy but-

Lily: I don’t think it sounds crazy at all. In fact maybe he is. I mean you guys always had a really intense connection. You could always tell what was going on with him. Besides who is this Ian person anyway, who’s to say he’s telling the truth. Maybe there’s more to the story.

Maggie: Oh I know for a fact that there’s more to the story. He just can’t…or won’t tell me it. But please god let’s not go there. Please don’t put false hope in my head. I can’t lose him a second time.

Lily: Ok, ok. I know. I’m sorry. I’m just saying if you feel something, maybe there’s a reason. What does your heart tell you?

Maggie: (tearing up) That Ricky and I were nowhere near done. He’s the love of my life. (She shrugs) The time we spent apart, me trying to fight it, it was all useless. It was a waste of time, time I could have spent with him.

Lily takes her friend’s hand from across the table, and she smiles showcasing her true empathy.

Lily: I’m so so sorry that you’re going through all of this. I wish I could change it for you.

Maggie: You know I kept thinking why was I so calm about waiting to find out if I was really pregnant. I just kept putting it off. And you know not knowing is not my thing.

Lily: Yea, you’re not exactly a fly by your seat kind of girl. (She takes a sip of her coffee)

Maggie:(shaking her head) No, not at all. But the more I kept putting it off, the more I began to realize that it wasn’t because I was scared of it being positive…or scared of choosing to be with him, quite frankly my heart already chose him for me…I love him. I was scared that it wouldn’t be positive. And it wasn’t. I would have been ok with it being positive…I would have been more than ok with having a baby with him. I wanted that life…and not just in general… but with him. I always have. And now I’m never going to get to have that. And I wish I was pregnant, now more than ever, because then at least I’d have a piece of him with me forever. And maybe that sounds selfish but-

Lily: It doesn’t.

Maggie: I just- I can’t-

Lily moves over to the other side and hugs her friend tighter.

Maggie: (crying harder, and wiping her tears from her cheeks) I just keep thinking, did he know…I mean did he really know how much I love him?

Lily: He knew. Anyone who got the rare chance to catch a glimpse of your relationship, could tell. Trust me, he knew. And he loved you just the same.

The-Vampire-Diaries-3x14-Dangerous-Liaisons-HD-Screencaps-caroline-forbes-28981119-1280-720[1]Through the coffee house window, sits a man in a parked car, watching way more intently than any normal bystander should. The same car and man from before. He looks like he’s on a mission and upon comforting Maggie in her time of need, Lily takes notice. The man looks away.

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Lily: Hey, why don’t I take you back home, ok? It’s getting late, you should rest.

Maggie: Yea I think I’ve had enough of the world for today. (She laughs with little amusement)

Lily leaves money on the table and ushers her friend out. As they leave Lily notices the car and the man inside are gone. She drapes her arm over Maggie’s shoulder and walks her home.

side hug

Lily is returning from dropping Maggie off at home and notices the same car from the coffee house is parked this time right across from Maggie’s building, adjacent to her apartment window.

Inside the car sits a man, talking on a cell phone, the conversation seems rather heated.

“She’s not alone, her friend came over…a blonde. No she’s not okay. No, she’s a mess. What do you expect? Whatever…look-”

Lily stops and stares at the car. She couldn’t hear what the man was saying but she had a feeling he’d been watching her and Maggie. And Lily was not about to let that slide.car cleavage

Lily walks over to the car and knocks hard on the window. The man gets startled and hangs up his phone quickly.

He rolls his window down, peering up at Lily.

“Can I help you?” He says.

Lily leans down, and comes face to face with a handsome, blue eyed man. Lily smiles brightly, her cleavage just enough to divert the man’s attention for a second.

normal_Revenge416-2456[1]Lily: (noticing) Eyes up here buddy.

The man slightly embarrassed, mentally kicking himself for being so obvious locks eyes with hers.

(Laughs) “Can I help you?” He repeats.

car window

Lily: Yea, you can…why the hell are you following my friend?

The man looks shocked at her clever eye.

Lily: Because I have to tell you if you’re supposed to be discreet, you’re doing a really shitty job. I spotted you from the minute I came over to visit her.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Lily: (glares at him) You’re never going to get rid of me with that lie.

“Look I can’t say anything-I’m just doing my job. There are serious things going on. I’m just trying to keep your friend safe.”

Lily: You’re Ian…aren’t you?

The man looks at her, unsure of what to say.

tumblr_n1vi73F5d11rjqfn9o8_500[1]Lily: (smiles flirtatiously) Your silence speaks volumes.

Even when she’s being bossy, Lily had this way of being sexy. The man remains tightlipped, which only frustrates Lily more. She huffs, opens the car door and gets in the passenger seat. The man looks at her in even more shock than when she first called him out.

car talk 2Lily: Let’s pretend I actually believe you. If you are this Ian person, that means you know what actually happened to Ricky. And in all honesty just the fact that little old me was enough to rattle your cage and throw you off your game, speaks for itself. If you ask me, I think there’s more to this story.

“With all due respect but I didn’t ask you,” He says.

Lily: (smiles) Minor Detail. (She shrugs) If you think I’m going to let you off the hook, without sharing, you are seriously mistaken handsome. But don’t worry I know how to keep a secret.

He looks at her…dumbfounded…yet again. This girl has some guts. I could be a psycho, He thinks.

Ian: (sighs heavily) My name is Ian. I work with Ricky. And I really am just trying to keep an eye on Maggie. There are a lot of unresolved things going on right now, and while you’re sitting here distracting me, she could be in danger.

Lily: (narrows her gaze) Fine, get back to work then. Maybe be a little more stealth about it, huh? Don’t need you drawing any extra attention, to an already delicate situation. But remember I’m onto you. And if you think I’m leaving Maggie alone tonight, you’ve got another thing coming. I don’t trust you for shit.

Ian: I wouldn’t have it any other way. You’re smart not to.

Lily steps out of the car and turns to walk away, but stops.

Lily: (bends down to peer through the window again) Do you work or did you work with Ricky? Because you said and I quote “I work with Ricky,” as in present tense.

Ian: An oversight. I guess it’s been hard adapting. I’m sure your friend Maggie has made mistakes like that over the past week.

Lily: Hmmm? Interesting. Men in the CIA are always so keen, so on their game, their attention to detail can be astounding.

Ian is shocked at her knowledge. Lily was the only friend who knew about Ricky’s secret life. Lily was also the only one who got to truly witness how in love Ricky and Maggie really were. The rest of the world thought they were just casual acquaintances. It took work, but they both gave it their all, because they knew it was worth it, just to be together.

Ian: Can being the operative word. Loss will affect anybody, anytime, anywhere.

Lily: Maybe.

normal_Revenge416-2431[1]Ian: Besides, information like that in the wrong hands (he shrugs, looking her over) can be dangerous. You know a little too much, bright eyes.

Lily: Are you threatening me? Or flirting with me?

Ian: Neither. Or maybe both. Or maybe just the latter. (He smirks) I’ll leave it up to your interpretation. But don’t worry, I’ll keep my eye on you too, just in case.

Lily: (laughs sarcastically) Oh I bet you will. But I’d rather take my chances defending myself, you’retumblr_inline_mw9wffWYW51qfmnua[1] not exactly doing the best job. And in case you haven’t noticed I can handle myself pretty well.

Ian: Oh I’ve noticed. I guess I just wasn’t trained to deal with beautiful distractions.

Lily: Hmm, I guess not. Word of advice never underestimate the best friend, she’s always the one you need to get through first.

Ian: (smirking) I wouldn’t think of it.

Lily walks away back toward Maggie’s apartment and Ian’s eyes wander after her. His phone rings.

Ian: Hello?…Yea we may have a problem. I just met the blonde, she’s feisty that’s for sure….and did I mention that I can’t believe you’re making me do this…

tumblr_ne2ikuxL1a1tjodfqo1_500[1]In a darkened motel somewhere unnoticeable, sits a shadowy figure in a chair. A hand reaches for a nearby lamp, turning it on, Ricky’s face comes into view.

tumblr_mwq04o7S6O1qax2xho1_250[1]Ricky: I see you’ve met Lily. She’s a good friend. Don’t worry about her. Just a little while longer, and it’ll all be over…but until then, keep my girl safe. I’m trusting you. She means everything to me. (he says looking at a picture of he and Maggie from his wallet.)

tumblr_nk78h6LEta1tkuq2lo1_500[1] micky pic 3

To be continued…

 Did you think I’d actually leave you hanging?

Of course Ricky’s ALIVE!

#MaggieIsGonnaFreak

#WhoDigsLily

#ShesSassy

#IanThinksSoToo

#SpoilerAlert? 😉

Did you enjoy meeting Ian?

Nick Wechsler is my #dreamcast

Nick Wechsler is my #dreamcast “Ian”

lily and ian

Ian & Lily

***QUICK AUTHOR’S NOTE***

For those keeping up with Love Conflicted, I just want to quickly clue you in on my plans for posting the duration of the story. In order to preserve the momentum and give you the best story I can give you, I’m going to take a break from posting for this story. I post as I write (it works for me) and it’s just kind of coming out of me and flowing, but I don’t want the next few parts to be forced or rushed. I’m not quite sure how I want things to go from here. So I’m gonna take some time to finish it and then I will post accordingly. Thanks so much for reading! I will have some other fun stuff for you guys to read in the meantime. And please feel free to tell me what you think in the comments below, or follow me on twitter and let’s chat there! Tell me, tell me all the things 😉 Keep writing and keep feeling all the feels you lovely humans!

Twitter: @shellbelle91

 ** I do not take credit for any gifs, or any images used in my edits or otherwise. **

-<3-

 

Love Conflicted-Chapter 4

Previously on Love Conflicted…

Read Part 3 HERELC poster

candice-lily

The apartment is dark. To the naked eye, you cannot be sure what time of day it really is. The curtains are drawn. The lights are off. There is a silence unlike any other. Oddly enough the only sound that can be heard is the ticking of her wall clock in the kitchen, and the beeping of the landline signally she has a voice message.

Maggie lays on her bed staring up at the ceiling fan spinning slowly above her.

Losing herself in time as it ticks by; minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day.

It’s been a week since she heard the news about Ricky and digesting that reality still hasn’t happened for her. She feels it never will.

Riddling her mind with what if’s and happy memories. Last moments and conversations.

“What was the last thing I ever said to him?” She thinks.

Maggie sits up. She makes her way, begrudgingly into the kitchen. Her movements are sluggish at best, and she seems to be in a fog. The only literal comparison to such behavior would be the acts of a zombie.

The kitchen comes into view, as Maggie finally reaches into her fridge and sets to eating her first meal in days.

It’s as if in all the heartbreak, she’s withdrawn from life.

Maggie’s house phone begins to ring….and ring…and ring.

She pays no mind to it as she continues to eat her bowl of cereal. The only thing she could muster up “making.”

Her voice mail cuts into the silence.

“Hi it’s Maggie, leave me a message, if you want, or if you don’t, that’s cool too, bye.”

*Beep*

“Hi Mags, it’s Lily again. I haven’t heard from you for quite a bit and you’re not one to disappear on us. The boss has been asking why you haven’t been to work. I assume you’re sick or something. That stomach flu thing has been going around. Anyway I’m worried about you, please just give me a call back.”

Maggie’s job and her friends have been leaving countless messages, wondering where she’s been.

Maggie finishes up her cereal and throws her bowl in the sink, she then slinks back to her bed. And curls up into a ball, drowning herself in her comforter, much like the drowning her heart feels since losing Ricky so suddenly.

Maggie’s cellphone buzzes for the millionth time, it seems. She glances over to it, as it sits on her bedside table.

Maggie reaches for it and goes to her picture gallery, instinctually.

As she scrolls through her pictures, memories of Ricky overpower her. But she doesn’t care; she needed to see him, see them together. She needed to feel close to him.

maggie and ricky pic

micky 4

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micky 10

micky 11

micky 12

micky 13

micky kiss 2

micky kiss

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micky pic 3

bed micky

She tears up and then comes across a video. She hits play.

camera vid

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Ricky comes into Maggie’s living room, shirtless, and holding a cup of coffee.

Maggie: Sleeping beauty is finally up! Good morning my love.maggie bed

It’s evident that Ricky feels at home there, with Maggie.

It’s evident that their relationship was a very serious one.

Ricky: What are you doing? Are you video-ing me?

Maggie is off screen, just the voice behind the camera phone.

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Maggie: (laughs) Yes.

Ricky: Aww man, why?

Maggie: Because you’re cute.

Ricky: Oh really? You think I’m cute?

Maggie: Yup.

Ricky: Well I think you’re cuter.

Maggie: Oh. Just cute?

Ricky: (pretends to think about it as he walks closer to her.) I think you’re sexy. How bout that? Does that work for you?

Maggie: Maybe.

Ricky: (flirtatiously) Shut that thing off and come here.

Maggie: (giggles) No.

Ricky: (glares at her) Yes. Come here.

Ricky starts walking toward the cameratumblr_mzzbxdb3Yc1qc2poho3_250[1]

Maggie: You’re gonna have to catch me first.

Maggie laughs backing away.

Ricky laughs following her.

Ricky: Girl, you know I will chase you, come here!

She shrieks, trying to run but he grabs her.

The camera phone knocks onto the couch and it’s angled to the ceiling.

You hear him kiss her as she laughs.

The video cuts there.

Maggie stares at the video, tears streaming down her face.

She gets up out of bed and walks into her living room.

“He was just here. He was so young and full of life. He was so loving. He was the love of my life. And I miss him terribly.” She thinks.

Maggie sits on her couch and hugs a pillow close to her, looking around, remembering the events after that video cut off.

She cries until her eyes run dry. Lately that’s nothing new for her.

Her house phone rings again…straight to voicemail, as usual.

“Hey it’s Lily,… for the hundredth…probably millionth time, are you as sick of receiving these messages as I am of leaving them. I’m coming over.”

Maggie covers herself with a blanket and drifts off to sleep.

It seems like these days, sleep is her only escape. And even then Ricky finds his way into her dreams.

A little while later, a knock is heard at her door.

Maggie huffs and drags herself over to it.

She opens the door to find her best friend and co-worker; Lily.tumblr_m06ua6dNoW1r8un78o1_250[1]

Lily: Oh my god, so you are alive! Where the hell have you been? I have been worried sick!

Lily takes one look at a puffy eyed, raggedly dressed Maggie and knows something is wrong.

tumblr_noboa0kmJj1sikj1co7_500[1]Lily: Oh no. What happened?

Maggie: Ricky’s dead. And I thought I was pregnant with his child, but turns out, I’m not.

Lily looks dumbfounded.

To be continued…

* I do not take credit for any images used in my edits or otherwise,

nor do I take credit for any gifs used.*

P.S. I apologize for my crappy manips, haha, I tried!…I needed some visuals of these two together because I think they would be stunning onscreen together! 😉 And I felt like Candice Accola is the perfect “best friend” so she’s my #dreamcast “Lily.”

-<3-

Happy Helios!

the-fray-helios-album-coverSo ever since I randomly saw The Fray’s “Over my head (Cable Car)” music video one day on the MTV Hits video channel, they have been my favorite band. And they will never cease to amaze me. With that being said, their new (and fourth) album “Helios” drops today. But due to modernized times, the album has been streaming for free on iTunes since last week and naturally being the uber fan that I am, I HAD to give it a listen.

Granted I had already heard some songs. They released their hit single “Love don’t die” and then later “Hurricane” was released on YouTube and available for download on iTunes. The band also performed “Wherever this goes” and a few others in a special they did for Fuse. The band has also performed a few new others in more recent concert appearances. mobile-header

When I listened to the full album I realized that this was a masterpiece. And I wouldn’t expect anything less from this band. They have this way of bottling emotion into words and spitting them out into song. It is something that I feel a lot of artists fall short of these days. They rather give you something to dance to instead of having to feel. But The Fray manages to do both.

The band has stated that this album is lighter then their past few. Definitely lighter then the ladder “Scars and Stories.” In a recent interview they explained that they are all in really good places in their lives, some are getting married, some are having babies. So this record is more fun, and that shows. But at the same time that doesn’t change why we all love them so much and that is because their lyrics move people. This record is a new direction for the band, not only according to mood, but also sonically. The band definitely tried new things, and experimented with new sounds and new instruments and it’s a beautiful thing.

The release of “Love don’t die” made me see that this was a new direction, but I also think it was a smart single choice because it had parts of nostalgic songs in it. As the major lyric junkie that I am, I sat there on my bed listening to the whole album and coining lyrics I knew I’d have to share later. So here it goes…The whole album is amazing and worth every listen, but these few lyrics from songs were just instant favorites for me.

Tracklist Below…

My favs: (so far) #'s 6,8,9,10,11.

My favs: (so far)
#’s 6,8,9,10,11.

 “Shadow and A Dancer”

Hello love
Remember that touch
That skin on skin summer rush
Sweeping up the both of us

***

And it’s you and me
And our bodies are remembering
We’re turning ever so slowly
In the candlelight trembling

Like a shadow and a dancer
We were looking for the answers
Keeping perfect time
Like a shadow and a dancer
We know the summer thrill is gone
But we’ve never been so in love
Like a shadow and a dancer
No, we’ve never been so in love
Like a shadow and a dancer

“Wherever This Goes”

Wherever this goes (goes)
No matter how far (far)
Baby, you are the song that’s written on my heart
Wherever we stand, wherever we fall
Don’t matter at all, cause I will be forever yours
From this moment till the day the curtains close
Wherever this goes

“Break Your Plans”

I wish I had cheated
At least that’s a reason
I’d understand why you’re leaving now

We both stopped breathing
It could not last
I guess I’m just afraid to ask

But what if you don’t?
What if you stay and …

Break your plans tonight
Lay your hand in mine
There’s no guarantee we’ll make it, make this thing right
But break your plans for me tonight
Tonight …

You call this closure
It’s barely over
How do you move on so fast?

“Keep On Wanting”

But it’s not what you want that matters it’s what you want more
So go on, lie to yourself but don’t lie to me

And there’s the door
Didn’t quit but now up and leave you don’t need this
Anymore
Yeah tonight lights up, show the town that you can

Open up your broken heart
And keep on wanting
Fallen saints and fallen stars
But it don’t mean nothing
Everybody feels left out of a house they can’t get in
So open up your broken
And keep on wanting
So keep on wanting

There’s two kinds of people, those who try and those who don’t
And only time will tell which one you are
And it’s alright if you don’t know which way you’re gonna go
Just don’t be afraid to feel it all

“Same As You”

Laying near you, swear you can feel me
Reach your hand and try to touch this skin
But it’s just you breathing

Torn fabric, wrapped around you
Hands shaking, as you’re reaching out
To cover that mirror now

No one can take this from you
No, can’t carry this for you
But you can stand if you want to
Or fall if you want to
I’ll do the same as you
You can dance if you want to
Or break if you want to
I’ll do the same as you
The same as you

So I got the lyrics from azlyrics but I tweaked a few, because I thought they were wrong lol, but sometimes it’s hard to tell so I did my best! 😀

Congrats boys, you’ve done it again, the musical world salutes you!

FRAY0221

Can’t wait to catch you on tour! 😀

Everyone pick up (yes I mean go to a store and psychically buy it like I’m gonna do #oldschool) or download on iTunes (if you’re into that jazz)  “Helios” out now!!!!! (March 3rd, for Europe!)

Check out the band’s latest music video guest starring The Vampire Diaries, Candice Accola

(aka Joe King’s (Guitarist) wife to be!)

THE-FRAY-ACCOLA

Happy Helios Day to my fellow Fray fans!

-<3-