Inspiration <3

Within the last couple of days I recently came across some really amazing videos…that just resonated with me. So I just thought I’d share. My facebook page has literally been plagued with these videos in hopes that others will see all they have to offer…sometimes just hearing someone speak about the issues you feel so many of us face is enough to make you feel a little lighter that day…so I hope this makes your day lighter…

1.

This first one is a very motivational speech by actress/activist Sophia Bush. I’ve been a Sophia Bush fan since her early days on One Tree Hill. And I’ve noticed just how much she cares about those around her. The idea that she had a huge part in the “0 is not a size” campaign that her character Brooke Davis features in her clothing line, made me really happy to call myself her fan. In this speech Sophia talks about inner beauty in which she says; “We get gorgeous when we get conscious, we get confident when we get concerned, life is about consumption.” I can’t say much else other then the fact that I really love when women realize just how strong they are, and just how much we can do for ourselves and the world. Body image has always been an issue that falls mostly upon the female audience and the media does little to help us realize that your outer self isn’t as important as your inner self. But every so often there’s a ray of light. A small glimmer in that one person who uses media and social networking sites to go beyond their everyday routine in order to spread awareness and pride amongst young women. What a great role model!

*You can catch Sophia Bush playing badass Detective Erin Lindsay on Chicago PD on Wednesdays @10 on NBC…

I’ll be watching tonight!

det lindsay

2.

This next video was posted on Z100’s facebook, and in between the celebrity news this shined through. This girl has shown so many sides to what girls, women (and boys & men) go through… and it’s a true eye opener…it is brilliant and inspirational. I just want to touch upon a few key parts … “you don’t need any miracle cream to keep your passion smooth…or diet pills to slim your kindness down, and when you start to drown in these pity expectations you better re-examine the miracle of your existence because you are worth so much more then your waist line.”  She’s definitely someone to look out for, she’s got a great mind, and that’s what we as girls and women need to focus on. The fact that our minds are creative, they are full of ideas and talent, and using them to the best of our abilities is more rewarding then any gratification a compliment from a man can give us.

*Visit her youtube channel HERE

slam poem

3.

This last video, is about the latest media phenomenon… the #selfie. I am guilty of taking selfies, as I am sure most of us are. Sometimes, if you’re having a good hair day or you like your outfit, you wanna capture it. But then again I’ve taken the bummy selfie too, ya know the days your in sweats, wearing your glasses, drinking tea, and curled up watching a movie. The selfie isn’t a bad thing. And this video proves just how amazing the act of taking a selfie can be. I won’t give anything away, but the way this video indulges in the selfie, is such a creative and beautiful concept.  “When [the other girls] said they were insecure about things, those were the things that made them different. The things that make them different, make them unique and that made them beautiful.”

*So ladies (and gents) take them selfies with no shame! 😀 (and props to Dove for making just a great documentary)

#Selfie

#Selfie

Happy Wednesday!

-<3-

“Secret” Society Comes to Life

As you may know, (if you follow this blog) I recently posted a my first VLOG…(you can watch that HERE) and in it I stated how I wanted to get back into shooting videos and editing. Since I graduated I have really just been more focused on the writing portion of my interests. But this year I wanted to reacquaint myself with the act of telling a story through moving images rather then just through words. So as a way to combine my two passions of writing and video, I decided to take a few of my poems that have already been featured on this blog and transform them into Poetry Videos. So I hope you watch and I hope you enjoy!

*Please welcome MichelleLeighWrites first video of my Poetry “in motion” Series…*

( thanks for the name Lauren! 😉 )

Starring the Lovely Lauren

Photo By: Robert DeSantos Jr.

Photo By: Robert DeSantos Jr.

First Read “Secret” Society HERE

Then Watch “Secret” Society HERE

or Watch Below

Comment on YouTube or tell me here in the comments what you think!

Thanks for watching!

************

Just a few photos from the video shoot! 😀

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Having fun “on set” (p.s. thanks to Rob Jr. for the assistance!)

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Lauren deep in character…

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Lauren had quite the few outfit changes…I call this the “art teacher” look

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Lauren rockin’ her “Freedom” T-shirt…*peace sign* is a must 🙂

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Directing... Gotta work them angles ;)

Directing… Gotta work them angles 😉

Lauren's Artwork, I'm keeping it! #memories

Lauren’s Artwork, I’m keeping it! #memories

If you take anything away from this poetry video…

let it be this…

it’s ok to BE Yourself.

Happy Monday!

(**And stick around I’m hoping to shoot another video soon!**)

-<3-

Mysterious Attraction Ch. 6 Part 2

Previously on Mysterious Attraction…

RECAP

*****

And this week…

Husband vs Wife

While Lexie hashes it out with Reeves… Carter comes home to find Kelly has dinner cooking, and the table set for two.

Kelly enters the room in a slinky dress

Kelly: Hey, you’re home. (smiling brightly)gh-02-14-12-1

Carter: Yea…hey. (looks around confused)

Kelly comes over to him and kisses him

Carter: (pushing her away) Kelly…I can’t do this.

Kelly: Do what?

Carter: I can’t pretend anymore.

Kelly: Is it because of Lexie?

Carter: Why would you say that?

9fb3dc4add631c5c5a0ee75b3afb5976Kelly: I’m not stupid Carter, I saw the panic in your eyes when I showed up today. I saw how you looked at her.

Carter: Kelly I-

Kelly: And I heard you… I heard you tell her that you have to be with her.

Carter: Kelly….I’m sorry.

Kelly: You’re sorry?

Carter looks down

Kelly: How long?

Carter: Kelly?

Kelly: How long?

Carter: On and off for a year and a half.

Kelly: Oh my god. (doubling back, tearing up, gasping as she grabs her chest)lante-baby2

Carter: I didn’t want you to find out this way…

Kelly: Well…a year and a half…it seems like you didn’t want me to find out at all!

Carter: I didn’t want to have this conversation. I didn’t want to hurt you.

Kelly: That’s a bunch of bullshit, and you know it! I guess it was all a matter of time….before you retaliated. Silly me, I thought we actually moved past everything that happened between us.

Carter: Moved past what? Your betrayal? (glares at her) Come on Kell- you and I- we never should have gotten married. Only I was too stupid and blinded that I didn’t see it.

Kelly: See what?

Carter: (screams) That you never loved me!

Kelly: That’s not true! How can you say that!

Carter: It is true, it is. Deep down you know that it is.

Kelly: (crying) How could you possibly say that? After everything we’ve had together…after-

Carter: 5 MONTHS Kell…5 MONTHS of marriage and you couldn’t hack it.

Kelly: I understand I made a huge mistake. But it was just that…a mistake. I regretted it from the minute that it happened. And I’ve spent the last 3 years of my life trying to make it up to you…but you won’t let me in! And now I know why. You’ve been screwing your boss. I guess that’s how you pave a way for yourself, huh? She’s a classy board that Lexie….although I gotta say she lacks originality.

Carter: Don’t you dare. Leave her out of this.

Kelly: Oh I’m sorry are you offended by my insults of your mistress.

Carter: That’s funny…because she’s felt more like my wife then you ever have…

Kelly’s face drops and her face turns cold

6a00d83451b72b69e20115701228e4970b-320wiKelly: (dumbfounded and crying) I can’t believe you right now…who are you?

Carter: I’m the man who’s tired of being used as your punching bag…Besides your problem’s with me so like I said… leave her out of it.

Kelly: So what now…your just gonna leave me for her. What do you really think is gonna happen? I mean what do you really think you and New York City’s greatest mob princess are gonna get married and live happily ever. Carter, please if you were gonna cheat aim a little higher…

Carter: Oh you mean like you…when you nailed the first bartender you got your hands on.

Kelly glares at him

Carter: (paces the room) You have NO room to judge. You strayed first. This distance between us, you created it. So don’t you dare put that on me.

Kelly: You’re not exactly innocent here, Carter?

Carter: Who are you kidding here Kell- I fought for you. I fought like hell to put us back together. And against my better judgement against the feeling in my gutt, against my heart screaming to run…I stayed. And now I can’t figure out why. And in the grand scheme of things I can’t figure out why you wanted me to.

Kelly: Well I asked you to stay because I love you. And I thought you stayed because you love me. I thought we meant something to each other.

Carter: We did. And in a way I guess we still do. I do still love you Kell,  but-

Kelly: But what…why can’t we just put all this behind us and start over?

Carter: Because it’s not the same.

Kelly: But it can be…(reaches for him)

Carter: (moves away) No it can’t.

Kelly: Why not?

Carter: Because I’m in love with Lexie.

Kelly stops and looks up at him

Carter: I meant what I said to her…I have to be with her. Which means that we-

Kelly: Are you saying that you want a divorce?

Carter: I don’t see any other option at this point.

Kelly: I can’t believe this is happening, (hugs herself and sinks to the floor).

Carter: (kneeling down beside her) Kelly, I don’t want to hurt you. This wasn’t my intention. I didn’t seek Lexie out hoping to get back at you…meeting her was an accident and the attraction between us…it just…it just happened.

Kelly: I can’t hear this, (covers her ears).

Carter: I’m sorry, but I just…I think it was a sign that we’re better off apart. You weren’t the one for me, and I’m not the one for you.

Kelly: Speak for yourself.

Carter: Kelly…don’t do this ok? This is hard enough…

Kelly: But I love you…

Carter: No. I think you love the idea of me.

Kelly: No. I love you.

Carter: Well I’m sorry…but I just don’t feel it anymore.

Kelly: You don’t love me?

Carter: Like I said before we’ll always be linked in some way. But it’s not the same. So much has changed. I’ll always love you…but I’m just not…I’m just not-

Kelly: Just not what?

Carter: I’m just not in love with you anymore.

Kelly shuts her eyes tightly and buries her head in her knees as she sobs, sitting on the floor.

Kelly: (looking up at Carter) But you are in love with Lexie?

Carter: I am.

Kelly stands and walks away from Carter

Carter follows

Kelly:(turning back toward Carter)  And does she love you?

Carter: Yea, she does.

Kelly: She’s gonna break your heart.

Carter:(shaking his head) No she’s not.

Kelly: Yes she will. People like her…they only look out for themselves.

Carter: Well, then you don’t know Lexie.

Kelly: She’s gonna break your heart.

Carter: Well I don’t think so. But if by some chance she does, it’s a chance I’m willing to take.

Kelly: Why?

Carter: The risk is part of the reward. And I take my biggest risks when it comes to love. You should know that.

Kelly: I do (shakes her head in disbelief of Carter’s kind character) ….God if she thinks she’s getting you without a fight. She’s got another thing coming.

Carter: I don’t think you wanna go up against Lexie. She doesn’t like to lose.

julie_marie_berman_general_hospital_may_5_2010_UJojpy1.sizedKelly: (smirking) Neither do I.

Carter: Kell- this isn’t a game, ok?

Kelly: Who’s laughing…

Carter: Kelly…

Kelly: In order for you to be granted a divorce, both parties have to want it, and well I don’t. I won’t sign the paperwork. I just won’t. (crosses her arms)

Carter: Kelly don’t go there. I don’t want this to get ugly. But it will, if it has to.

Kelly: (in a burst of anger) Well then you shouldn’t have cheated!

Carter: Neither should have you.

Kelly: (crying) Carter- please, please…I don’t want this. Please just give me one more chance.

Carter: Kelly it wouldn’t matter. We just- we don’t work anymore. It would just be like pouring salt in an old wound. It’d be more painful then anything. We’d be setting ourselves up for failure and I won’t do that to you or myself. I won’t give you false hope.

Kelly: But I don’t know what my life looks like without you.

Carter: Maybe that’s part of the problem. Instead of loving me, you leaned on me. Maybe it’s time you learn to depend on yourself.

Kelly: You’re the only man I ever loved.

Carter: Well maybe that just wasn’t enough…Look it’s getting late and I have someplace to be-

Kelly: Oh…I wonder where (laughs sarcastically)

Carter: I’ll have my lawyer draw up the papers…you’ll have them by tomorrow morning.

Kelly: (weeping) Carter?

imagesCarter: Goodbye Kelly…I’m sorry… but trust me this is how it has to be. I have faith that one day you’ll be able to thank me.

Carter ExitsMV5BMTkwOTM0NzE1NF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwOTA2MTMzNw@@._V1._SX624_SY351_

Kelly sinks to her couch, speechless, and crying.

*****************************************************************************

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Lexie sits in her living room in front of her fireplace. She looks at her phone. No messages. She gets up and starts to pace the room.

Lexie’s Thoughts:OTH_060

Ok deep breaths Lexie. He’s going to come back to you. He loves you. But she is still his wife and they have a lot to discuss. Oh god-What if she convinces him to stay with her again? What if you lose him? What if-

Ryan-Gosling-in-Gangster-Squad-1Carter: Hey-

Lexie’s snapped back into reality

Lexie: Hi, (smiles)

Carter: You ok?

Lexie: Yea.

Carter walks toward her and wraps his arms around her waist

Lexie: So how’d it go?

Carter: Hold that thought for a second, (kisses her).

Lexie smiles

Carter: It wasn’t the easiest thing I’ve ever done- but she’ll eventually learn why I did it. It was the best thing for the both of us.

Lexie nods

Carter: I called my lawyer he’s drawing up the papers as we speak, and we’ll both be faxed them by tomorrow morning.

Lexie: Wow. So this is really happening?

Carter: Yea it is…why? are you getting cold feet on me?

Lexie: Nope…Nice and toasty…I got my fuzzy slippers on (she smiles as they both laugh)

Carter: So…(he takes her hand and leads her over to the couch, sitting down and pulling her onto his lap) how was your talk with your dad?

Lexie: Surprisingly…it went really well. I think we really hit the root of everything and got a lot out in the air. It was good. I said things that I really needed to say and things he really needed to hear. And I think  maybe just maybe he realizes I’m a grown woman who can make her own decisions.

Carter: Whoa. That’s progress…so what’d he think of you and me? Should I be watching my back for the rest of time?

Lexie: No. I’ll protect you. (Carter smiles at her) Besides I pretty much explained to him that as a grown woman making her own decisions…falling in love with you has been at the top of my list.

Carter: (smiles) Best decision you ever made.

Lexie: No argument here, (smiles and kisses him).

Stick with Mysterious Attraction…a lot more to come!

mysterious attraction poster

*I do not take any credit for any of the images used, all belong to their rightful owners!*

-<3-

Old i-Pod Jams…

ipod

So today I go to take a shower and I usually put my i-Pod on to listen to…and while Justin Timberlake’s
“Lovestoned” begins playing….it abruptly stops before the soap even suds. Low Battery..ain’t it a bitch.

Justin barely got past… “She grabs the yellow bottle, she likes the way it hit her lips…”

Anyway needless to say it was a song-less shower for me…

So naturally I finish up and go to into my room to get dressed

I put my i-Pod on my deck to charge and then I get a music light-bulb

Duffy…

Damn girl…where have you been?

And all of a sudden I want to listen to her music, but all I have on my new i-Pod is stuff from her current album the one with “Well, Well, Well” on it…and let’s just say I was more of a “Stepping Stone” girl.

So I break into the old dingy, probably dusty, silver i-Pod nano… My first introduction into the apple world…the small leap from a disc-men or walk-men, and the giant leap from my *NSYNC and Britney Spears 2 second song hit clips, I can’t tell you how many times, I used to play that shit just to hear the chorus to “This I promise you”…

Anyway as I put my old i-Pod on, my room was filled with Duffy’s voice and a whole bunch of memories as I scrolled through the artist list. I think it’s safe to say that i-Pod consists of a ton of One Tree Hill/ The OC featured music, and a whole lotta rock bands that I probably can’t stomach listening to  much anymore. With the exception of their old stuff, I mean honestly you don’t even wanna know how I just freaked out dancing to Fall Out Boy’s “This Ain’t a Scene It’s an Arm’s Race,” and then there’s “Sugar We’re Going Down” and yes I was Singin’. I think that with age comes the great expectation of wisdom. And as I sat here listening to my old i-Pod jams, I was reminded of something, quite hysterical actually…

That awkward moment when you realize you used to be a really big My Chemical Romance fan  and wore a lot of black eyeliner, and bought every shirt with a skull on it…wait was I goth that one point in my life? haha #letyourfreakflagflyyy

Although I have to say dipping into my past music vibes is also freakin’ awesome!
It always manages to help me rediscover some awesome since forgotten songs…

The one thing I can say about my musical taste is that it is quite a cluster fudge of genres…

We have the usual suspects of course…*NSYNC, Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears…90′s GA-LORE!!!!

Bands that I once claim to love (thank you OTH/The OC/High school) like Fall Out Boy, Augustana, Jack’s Mannequin, Snow Patrol, Coldplay)… and The Fray whom still today I await their new album and consider them my favorite band.

A random slew of American Idol contestant music (thank you lime wire) 😉

And last but not least we take it back a little to the days of Motown where my parents influences really hit home, as The Jackson 5, Al Green, Marvin Gaye, and The Temptations sway their way in…

My current shuffle favs…

“Too Close”- Next

“Best day of my life”- Dido

“You Oughta Know”- Alanis Morrisette (wasn’t this the original breakup song? ;))

“That’s the way it is”- Celine Dion (special place in the heart for Celine, guys, special place)

“Let’s get it on”- Gavin Degraw (Marvin Gaye cover) *the original is floatin’ around on there, I’m sure of it*

“Heartless”- Kris Allen (Kanye West cover) *the original is NOT floatin’ around on there, I’m not so sure of it* haha

“One More Chance”- Jackson 5

“Finally”- Cece Peniston

“Waterfalls”- TLC (Yessssss!!!!)

“I could fall in love with you”- Selena (HELLLL YESSSS!!!)

“I need some action”- Lady Saw

Ok so maybe I had quite a decent reggae collection too 😉

So I tried to find a pic from my goth phase...but I guess it wasn't documented too well, but I did find this pic...I spot a skull and a touch of black eyeliner ;)

So I tried to find a pic from my “goth phase”…but I guess it wasn’t documented too well, but I did find this pic…I spot a skull and a touch of black eyeliner 😉

Signed,

Music Flashback with old i-Pod Jams

Mysterious Attraction- Chapter 6

***UPDATED***

There seems to have been a small glitch during posting, and the ending got cut off.  Full Chapter up now!

Sorry about that! 😀

Previously on Mysterious Attraction

RECAP

And this week…

reeves vs lexie

Reeves sits at his desk, his back to the door, he’s on the phone

Reeves: Yea well, make sure there’s no trace back to us, ok?…No I don’t care what you have to do, just get it done, and do it well.

Lexie stares in annoyance at his conversation

Reeves turns in his chair to find Lexie standing there, leaning against his door wayReeves_Lexie

Lexie: Daily grind huh, dad? Ordering hits on people?

Reeves: (ignores her comment) It’s good to see you, princess.

Lexie: Don’t. You no longer have the right to call me that.

Reeves: I’m sorry. I was just trying to protect you.

Lexie: I do understand that. But your ways of protecting me are irrational, disgusting and suffocating. And I did not deserve that. Not from my father. I shouldn’t had to have feared for my life for no good reason.

Reeves: Lexie, I really truly am sorry. I would never intentionally hurt you. You know that right?

Lexie: I do. But it hurts either way dad. I just- I wish you would think for 5 seconds before you order your men to pull some stupid over-extravagant scheme.

Reeves: I know, I’m sorry you’re right, you’re absolutely right. I just wanted to get through to you. I wanted you to see the danger in all this.

Lexie: Yea well, mission accomplished.

Reeves: So I take it, I was right… Carter is Skully’s son?

Lexie: From what my people were able to dig up, yes.

Reeves: That son of a bitch! I’ll kill him! (paces the office in fury)

Lexie: (stops him) No. You won’t.

Reeves: What? Lexie…that bastard was using you…using you to get to me. No one uses my daughter!

Lexie: Dad. Dad! It wasn’t like that.

Reeves: Like hell it wasn’t! (screams with a venom hissed voice)

Lexie: It wasn’t! He didn’t know.

Reeves: And you’re seriously buying that? Lexie…come on…you know as well as I do that Skully’s next hit was only a matter of time. He’s been laying low for far too long! This is it! This is his retaliation!

Lexie: No. It isn’t … dad…Carter loves me.

Reeves: Lexie…of course he says that…your beautiful, and rich! It’s easy to lie about your feelings to  a beautiful girl! But what he doesn’t realize is that’s the last lie, he’ll ever tell. (about to leave his office in a rush)

Lexie: Dad stop! If you walk out that door…I swear to you…I won’t be around to watch as they haul you off to prison, but I will make sure that they do.

Reeves: (slowly turns around) Why are you protecting him? Is he threatening you? Blackmailing you?

Lexie: N0.

Reeves: Because if he is, you can tell me, we’ll fix it, whatever it is.

Lexie: No. I’m protecting him, because I love him. And because I know him. And because he didn’t know anything about Skully being his father. He had no clue.

Reeves: And you believe him?

Lexie: I believe him.

Reeves: I didn’t raise you to be naive, Lexie.

Lexie: No. But you did raise me to trust my gut. And my gut is telling me to follow my heart. And my heart is with him. So I am asking you, to back off. Let this go, and let me handle this.

Reeves: You know just because Carter doesn’t know, doesn’t mean Skully doesn’t.

Lexie: I really don’t think he does. I mean Carter’s mom is his biological mom, she must have been involved with Skully and didn’t want him to know about Carter. So she brought in another man to raise her son.

Reeves: Well just in case-

Lexie: Carter and I have it covered, we’ll look into things.

Reeves: Ok. But you promise me, promise me right now…that if you suspect anything…anything about anyone, if even the slightest detail doesn’t add up, promise that you’ll come to me, immediately.

Lexie: I will.

Reeves: Immediately Lexie. Don’t try and play the hero, don’t try to figure it out on your own. Just come to me, no questions asked, I will fix it.

Lexie: (hugs Reeves) I promise dad. But you don’t have to worry he loves me.

Reeves: For his sake, I truly hope he does.

Lexie: (sighs) Well…I should go.

Reeves: Lex?

Lexie: Yea?

Reeves: He still married?

Lexie: Not for long.

Reeves: And you’re ok…with breaking up a marriage?

Lexie: Really, dad?

Reeves: I’m just wondering. I mean I know you. You have a good heart, and this kinda thing can eat you up. The guilt…I can only imagine how much it’s killing you.

Lexie: It was.

Reeves: And what changed?

Lexie: Carter told me some things. Turned out his marriage wasn’t as perfect as he had claimed it to be.

Reeves: Meaning?

Lexie: Meaning…that Kelly…his wife…cheated a long time ago…their marriage hasn’t been the same since.

Reeves: So…you’re his way of getting back at her?

Lexie: No. (rolls her eyes, in frustration and offence)

Reeves: Lexie?

Lexie: Come on. I’m happy ok? I’m finally happy. And he’s the one making that possible. So please…just be happy for me? Don’t try and control this?

Reeves: Ok…but only because I trust you…I trust your heart and your gutt. But like I said-

Lexie: I know- I will call you if anything.

Reeves: (smiles) Ok…It was good to see you, I’m so glad you stopped by. I was beginning to think you’d never forgive me.

Lexie: Dad…let me make something clear. I understand you wanting to protect me, but that doesn’t mean I forgive you for it. This isn’t the first time you’ve done this. Your known for going too far. And with that being said the reason I’m really here is to tell you…that…I want out.

Reeves: (sighs in relief) It’s about time.

Lexie gives him a look of confusion

Reeves: I never wanted this life for you.

Lexie: I don’t understand, I thought you were grooming me to take over.

Reeves: No. I only let you into this business because I thought it was what you wanted. In some crazy way I thought it was what you needed to get past your grief. But I was wrong. The more responsibility you took on, the more it worried me. I’ve been waiting for the day you’d ask for an out. But I knew you had to come to that decision on your own.

Lexie: (laughs) Letting me come to a decision on my own…that’s a radical concept for you…well I’m glad you can at least grasp the concept. But to be honest it was Carter who geared me in the right direction.

Reeves: Well isn’t that convenient. He could be just trying to get you to step out, and weaken our man power.

Lexie: Dad.

Reeves: Or he could just be a good man.

Lexie: Thank you. And he is. So whataya say…you think there’s a career out there for me?

Reeves: Absolutely. Why do you think I made you head of the clothing store front. I knew fashion has always been something you were passionate about. My only hope was that you’d get more of a rush out of that side of the business, then this part of it.

Lexie: Yea well I guess at times we’re more alike than I realize. We thrive on danger and the adrenaline rush. But unlike you that rush isn’t something I’m comfortable living with. Because at the end of the day, it’s still dangerous and deadly.

Reeves: I couldn’t agree more. But I’ve made my bed, I’ve made my choices, and my enemies and now in order to protect my family, this is my life. And I need you to know I don’t enjoy it. But I’ll do what I have to, to protect you.

Lexie: Dad? I want you to know that none of this makes me love you less, I just don’t agree with any of it, and I can’t support it anymore. But I also don’t blame you for my choices. It was my choice to ask you to be apart of this war with Skully. It’s just when we lost mom…I didn’t want to feel that pain. I needed a way to cope…and I thought this was it. I wasn’t thinking clearly, and I don’t think I ever realized what all of this actually meant. I don’t want this.

Reeves: I don’t want this for you. I respected your drive to seek revenge, because I felt the same way. And I thought it would be hypocritical of me to exclude you, in this fight. Because you had hurt just as much as I did. But I never thought it would be permanent. This isn’t your life. So you do what’s best for you and I will support you 100%.

Lexie: Thank You.

Reeves: Lex, I want happiness for you…and I want you to know that anything that I have ever put you through or pressured you into involving this business, I am truly sorry for. For a long time I couldn’t even see straight. After losing your mother, I vowed to myself that I’d never let anything happen to you. So I guess keeping you apart of the business was my crazy way of keeping you safe. It was my way of keeping an eye on you. I have a lot of enemies and I worry about you. I am overjoyed that you want a better life for yourself. But I think that you may want to relocate all together.

Lexie: You really think that’s necessary?

Reeves: I do. Go, go somewhere you’ve never been, go start a fashion empire. I can fund everything. Which reminds me…(reaches into his inner suit jacket pocket) I think this belongs to you (hands her a wad of cash) I’m sorry my plan was unnecessarily out of line.

Lexie: (takes the money) Thank you. I appreciate this and the apology. But I think I’m going to stick around. I don’t think anyone is stupid enough to come after Reeves’ daughter. This is my home. Carter and I will figure out a safe way to live here.

Reeves: I hope so.

Lexie: Besides, even though you drive me crazy, and I usually end up screaming at you for your crazy antics. You’re my dad, and I love you. And I wouldn’t be happy living thousands of miles away from you.

Reeves: Love you princess, (he hugs her tightly)

Lexie: (smiles) Ok well I really better go now, Carter and I have a lot of things to discuss.

Reeves: Alright. Just be careful Lex, please.

Lexie: Don’t worry dad, (smiles and leaves, closing the door behind her)

baby lexieReeves: (Sighs…waiting a beat, he stands there and ponders, hands on hips, soon he takes out his cellphone) Hey yea, listen- do me a favor, pull up any information on Carter…I’m talking about everything you can find…I want to know every single detail of his life ….including everything there is to know about his parents. And one more thing Lexie is not to know a thing about this… ok? Ok thank you.

Reeves hangs up his phone and sighs, a picture of Lexie as a little girl sits on a nearby shelf. Reeves sighs

Reeves: (he whispers) Please forgive me, Princess.

STAY TUNED!…Chapter 6 continues next week…

Carter and Kelly finally have have the conversation you’ve been waiting for…

mysterious attraction poster

(*I do not take any credit for the actual images themselves, they all belong to their rightful owners*)

Happy Weekend!

-<3-

Demi Lovato; Style Steal <3

demi-lovato-nylon-1So you may have realized by now that I am a huge Demi Lovato fan. I think she’s such an inspiration. She is talented, beautiful and seems like a really down to earth, fun and kind person. But she also does all that in STYLE. I have always been infatuated with Demi’s fashion sense; one minute she can rock heels and go all girly glam, but the next she can go punk and be a total kick ass rocker. I admire her versatility. So I decided in honor of Demi’s Fashion Sense, I’d bring back the Bethany Joy Lenz Blog inspired “Wardrobe Wednesday” and infuse it with the “Steal Her Style” trend. I always thought Demi and I had some similarities in a weird way, so I dug through my closet and found some items that I thought could help create some of her fun fashion looks! Let’s get into it!

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DEMI LOVATO- “STEAL HER STYLE”

Outfit #1: “Casual Chic; I have someplace cool to be”

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Outfit #2: “Night Out on the Town”

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Outfit #3: “Rockstar’s Live Performance”

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Outfit #4: “Starbucks Run; Coffee Date”

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Outfit #5: “The Concert Tee”

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So in a nut shell I would describe this Demi Style experience as funky!

To dress like Demi I think there are a few key things you need to have in your wardrobe

*A leather Jacket and a blazer (Demi wears these A LOT)

*Some type of combat boot

*A black heel

*Black Jeans

*Black Black Black Black Black (lol)

*Some fun accessories

Demi is a style risk taker (um did you see the BLUE hair!)

She is a trendsetter.

And because of my little Demi fashion experiment, I learned that I found some fun new outfits to wear myself…

and they were all sitting there in my dresser and closet just waiting to be put together!

Demi Inspired Makeup & Hair:

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To achieve Demi’s Makeup look I

*used a lot of golden/bronze tones for my eyeshadow

*filled in my brows with a brow gel kit (Demi’s eyebrows are always flawless)

*used black eyeliner on top of my eyelid and winged it out slightly

*near my water line, used eyeliner and then black eyeshadow on a thin eyeliner brush and created a smokier eye popping look.

*used blush and bronze to create that Demi flawless tanned skin look

*kept it simple with nude lips… first used a nude beige creme lipstick with a golden lipstick to follow and a third golden lip gloss for shine

I know from the picture it doesn’t look like much, but it’s one of my favorite makeup looks I’ve ever done myself, I will definitely be using it in the future!

For Demi Inspired “Messy” Curls

*Curled hair using a wand curling iron

*Hair Spray before and after curling

*Loosen curls by brushing through with fingers

I don’t know about you guys but I always was so annoyed at how Demi could have her hair look so perfectly messy, like she always had these long beautiful messy curls and it would just look so effortless. I would always have such trouble curling my hair, until I got the curling wand! It is a hair life saver! It definitely takes some getting used to, but once you get the hang of using it, you will be super happy!

And as per usual I like to listen to music while I get ready… my two fav “Demi” Tracks right now include

“Neon Lights” & “Really Don’t Care”

Enjoy!

So that’s all for this “Style Steal” featuring Demi Lovato and

Happy Wardrobe Wednesday folks!

Thanks for reading!

(Stay Tuned for Mysterious Attraction; Chapter 6…Up FRIDAY!)

-<3-

Mysterious Attraction- Ch. 5 Part 3

Previously on Mysterious Attraction

RECAP

And this week…

Capture

Lexie settles into her office, and starts on some paperwork

A knock is heard at her door

Lexie: Come in.

Carter: Hey.

Lexie: Hi, (smiles getting up and walking toward him)

Carter: I noticed you rushed to get ready, you didn’t have time for your coffee…

Lexie: Ohhh you are a lifesaver…thank you, (takes the cup)

Carter: You’re welcome…besides I know you can’t function much without it so…I didn’t wanna subject the office to angry Lexie.

Lexie: Oh please angry Lexie is all they know at this point (laughs) But I am sure, they will thank you for putting me in such a good mood.

Carter: Yea well a little caffeine will do that.

Lexie: (laughs) I wasn’t talking about the coffee.

Carter: I know, I just wanted to hear you say it, (shrugs and smiles).

Lexie: Well…will you settle for me telling you how happy you make me?

Carter: That’s a start…(smiles..pulls her into a kiss)

Lexie: (pulls away and smiles) We have work to do.

Carter: I  am sure it can wait a few minutes… (tries to kiss her again)

Lexie: Carter…before this relationship goes any further….I need you to talk to Kelly. The more I fall for you, the worse I feel about this whole situation.

Carter: Trust me, I know the feeling. But I have to be with you.

Lexie: Hey I won’t argue, (laughs). But I just think that we should remain professional, until you sort things out.

Carter: Ok. I understand, and I respect that.

Lexie: Thank You.

Carter: Well look at us…we’re so grown up.

Lexie laughs.

Carter: So I’ll see you later?

Lexie: (nods with a smile) Absolutely.

Carter winks and opens the door to leave

Kelly stands there with a potted plant in her hands

Carter: Kelly?

Lexie’s face drops

Kelly: Carter.

Carter looks back at Lexie quickly, Lexie smiles nervously

Carter: What are you doing here?

Kelly: Well I just wanted to stop by to see Lexie…

Carter: Oh…I thought we said we’d do that someday soon.

Kelly: Yea but you said that last week, and you haven’t been home much lately so I figured I’d just drop by, myself.

Carter: Oh…

Carter looks at Lexie

Lexie: Umm, of course, please come in.  Would you like some coffee, or tea…water?

Kelly: No. I’m fine, thank you.

Lexie: So uh, what can I do for you?

Kelly: Oh nothing, I think you’ve done enough.

Lexie: I don’t understand what you mean?

Carter and Lexie exchange nervous glances

Kelly: You saved my life.

Lexie: Oh, (sighs with relief and laughs) I wish I could take all the credit but it was actually probably my fault that you were there in the first place…

Kelly: I don’t understand?

Lexie: It’s no secret that my family isn’t exactly known for their kindness. We have a lot of enemies, and because of some crazy misunderstanding, you were taken and I am so sorry for that…I’m sure Carter can fill you in…

Kelly: I’m sure he could, but he still hasn’t…which makes me worry he never will.

Lexie: Oh I think he will, won’t you Carter?

Carter: Yes, of course.

Kelly: You just…you haven’t been home much lately…

Lexie: I’m afraid that’s my fault, I um, I’ve been making everyone work overtime. I can be quite a workaholic… and I guess it doesn’t always dawn on me that not every employee of mine, feels the same.

Kelly: Oh don’t take all the blame, Carter doesn’t do anything he doesn’t want to (glances at her husband).

Carter coughs nervously

Lexie: Is there anything else I can do for you?

Kelly: Yea…you can take this (hands her the plant). I know it’s not much, I mean you save my life and I buy you a plant, it’s not exactly an even trade but-

Lexie: It’s beautiful. Unnecessary.  But beautiful, thank you.

Kelly: Well I just wanted to show my gratitude. I may not know why everything happened, and Carter does a lot to avoid me asking any questions about his work, but I do know that if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be here, so thank you.

Lexie: It was my pleasure.

Kelly smiles slightly and before she leaves she stops and looks at Carter

Kelly: Will you be home for dinner?

Carter: Of course.

Kelly: Ok good I’ll make your favorite, we can talk.

Carter: Sounds good, (forces a smile).

Kelly: Ok, I’ll see you later then, (leans over and kisses him).

Carter awkwardly kisses back and Lexie looks away

Kelly: Bye. Bye Lexie. Thanks again.

Lexie: No problem, (fakes a smile and a wave).

-Kelly exits-

Carter shuts the door behind her

Lexie and Carter both exhale in relief

Lexie: That was horrible…I literally thought I was going to stop breathing…

Carter: I’m so sorry, and I’m sorry I kissed her in front of you like that…I didn’t think that she’d show up here…

Lexie: It’s ok, she’s still your wife… it’s not your fault…do you think she heard anything…

Carter: I don’t think so.

Lexie: Really? I mean because some of the things she said-

Carter: Look, it’s gonna be ok, I’m gonna go home and I’m gonna tell her everything, and tomorrow, it’s gonna be a new beginning for us.

Lexie: I don’t think it’s going to be that easy Carter.

Carter: I know, but it’s all worth the fight.

Lexie: Is it?

Carter: Don’t Lexie. (starts pacing the room angrily)

Lexie: Look just hear me out ok?

Carter: No…you hear me out…hear me, when I say that we are happening. I don’t care what I have to do, who I have to hurt, it’s going to happen for us.

Lexie: So this is your ruthless side.

Carter: When it comes to love, I’ll be as ruthless as I can without completely losing who I am.

Lexie: I don’t want to be ruthless anymore. It’s not a life.

Carter: Neither is pretending to be in love with someone, when you aren’t.

Lexie: Did I ruin you? When we first met, you were so good.

Carter: Like you said, I thought I was, but I guess I’m not.

Lexie: No, I didn’t mean that. You are still good. I just think, I’ve corrupted you. I’ve made you think that our love can outweigh the love you had with Kelly and I think I may be wrong.

Carter: I don’t do anything I don’t want to, Lexie.

Lexie: Carter, if you do this. If you tell her. You may regret it. And I don’t want you to live a life with regret, trust me, it’s not fun.

Carter: So what are you saying, are you letting me go again? Because I have news for you, the pain of regret you feel for keeping us apart, isn’t going to even compare to any other regret you’ve ever felt before. We belong together.

Lexie: I realize that. But we can’t always get what we want. Sometimes it’s best to do the right thing. But I want you to be ok. I want you to be happy. And how can you ever be happy knowing you hurt the first woman you ever loved. I just think that what you have with Kelly is more than what we can ever have.

Carter: We won’t know until we try. Why are you so afraid that this relationship is gonna fail?

Lexie: Because it’s all I’ve ever known… every relationship in my entire life has failed. My own parents didn’t even stick around. I mean yea my father’s around still, but he and I lost whatever meaningful relationship we had, a long time ago.

Carter: Lexie, I’m not your parents, I’m not Joe, I’m not any other guy that walked out of your life, just because he could. I’m me, come on, you know me. You know my heart. And you know that it’s with you.

Lexie: Carter-I wanna be with you but-

Carter: Then be with me…stop trying to save me from myself, ok? I know what I’m doing.

Lexie: You’re gonna break her heart.

Carter: I know that, and trust me I’m not happy about how this has all played out, I don’t want to hurt her. But she and I both know, we aren’t working.

Lexie: You guys have had trouble in the past? You never told me that? I thought she was perfect…

Carter: No one is perfect. Don’t get me wrong, Kelly’s an amazing woman, and she once was an amazing wife. But something must have been missing, because after a few months of marriage, it didn’t take long for her to second guess me.

Lexie: What?

Carter: Kelly cheated on me 5 months after our wedding.

Lexie: (shocked) Oh my god… Carter I had no idea…

Carter: It was a long time ago.  And we got through it. But nothings ever been the same between us after that.

Lexie: How long ago was this?

Carter: About 3 years ago.

Lexie: Oh…

Carter: I want you to understand something…our relationship has nothing to do with that.

Lexie: How could it not? I mean your wife cheated, and then you did too. It’s tit for tat.

Carter: No. It wasn’t like that. I never had any intention of straying out of my marriage. Even after her infidelity, I fought like hell to make it work, because I grew up valuing marriage. I thought divorce wasn’t an option. And she begged for me to stay, so I stayed. But after countless apologies, screaming matches, and therapy you either learn to forgive and forget or get to a place of no return. And the night I saw you for the first time. Was the first time in my life, that I wished I had just let her go.

Lexie: You didn’t even know me.

Carter: No. But that didn’t matter, because I wanted to. And you weren’t some kind of payback, I swear. I just saw something in myself that I hadn’t in a long time. I felt alive, just watching you….  And that’s why I hated myself for it, because all the pain Kelly put me through had caused me to become numb and you changed all that with one small glance across a crowded room and then you smiled and I was a goner.

Lexie: You got all of that from one look and a smile?

Carter: It was a hell of a smile.

Lexie looks away confused

Carter: Lexie, look at me.

Lexie looks up

Carter: What happened between Kelly and I may have led me to you, but you are what made me stay. And you didn’t even have to ask.

Lexie: I get it. It’s like you said, the things that happened in our pasts shape who we are…but what I don’t understand is why you were so against our affair then? I mean you came up to me, you started the attraction-

Carter: It wasn’t about you. I was struggling with the idea that I was just as heartless as she had been. That as someone who went through being cheated on, that I could allow myself to impose that kind of pain on someone else, even if it was Kelly. That’s what scared me, it made me see myself as ruthless. It wasn’t about you, it wasn’t about your bossiness… to tell you the truth I kind of liked that part, (laughs). I just… the more you reminded me that I was married, the guiltier I felt, and the angrier I got at myself for feeling guilty. Because sure I had my values and I loved my wife and I thought I wanted to be committed to her and work things out, but she was the one who broke us. She got us here. And I was also angry because there I was falling in love with you, and you kept acting like it was just a fling. Which in turn made me pretend like that’s all it was. And that’s how this vicious circle we’ve created got so vicious.

Lexie: I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I made you think that we were ever just a fling. I’m sorry I ever made you think that I didn’t love you. But most importantly I’m sorry that you got your heart broken. Because it’s a really good one.

Carter: You think so?

Lexie: I know so.

Carter: Then will you please….just, be with me?

Lexie: Under one condition…

Carter: Anything…

Lexie: That  after you settle things between you and Kelly… that you and I have a complete conversation about all past, present and future experiences or mishaps, if you wanna get technical.

Carter: I think that’s a great idea. We may be a couple emotionally damaged people, but guess what those mishaps led us to each other so…maybe it was a blessing in disguise.

Lexie: Maybe. (smiles)

Carter: Ok, I have a condition of my own, if you don’t mind?

Lexie: By all means…

Carter: I want you to leave the business.

Lexie: Carter-

Carter: Lexie I can’t take this whole soap opera mob story anymore, it’s too dangerous and I can lose you in a heartbeat. And I wouldn’t be able to handle that.

Lexie: Carter…I don’t like what I do, in fact I hate it, and I hate that you’ve gotten wrapped up in it too. I hate that anyone has gotten wrapped up in this hell. But I made my choices and now I’m stuck with them.

Carter: That’s not true. Lexie you have so much to offer the world.

Lexie: Oh yea like what?

Carter: You’re a great business woman, I mean you can negotiate with the best of them. And you’re an incredibly talented designer. I mean I know this whole clothing line is just a front for all the mob business that goes on behind closed doors, but in case you haven’t noticed, people actually love your stuff. Just take the business and fashion side of this and you’ll be good to go.

Lexie: I appreciate your faith in me, I do. But people tremble in fear at the mere thought of my name…no one would ever work with me.

Carter: Lexie have you ever actually killed anyone?

Lexie: Yes.

Carter: Other then in self defense? Or because your father ordered you to?

Lexie looks away

Carter: You’re not your father. You’re not ruthless. I may have said so in the past. But that’s only because I was dealing with my own crap, and because I didn’t know you. You’re amazing. You risked your life to save my wife.

Lexie: Yea from my own father…

Carter: Yea but you didn’t know that at the time. Don’t sell yourself short. You didn’t worry about how you were going to get out of there, you just focused on saving her, and protecting me.

Lexie: Well, she’s your wife, and I saw how worried you were. And I love you, I did what any person who is  in love with someone would do, I found a way to help.

Carter: You’re selfless. And once I realized that, I knew that you and I could have something really amazing together. Despite how much you may have protested it, I knew deep down that you had to love me, I mean no one can fake that kind of love (smiles). So promise me…get out, just get out of the business and we will figure it all out together.

Lexie: (stares at him, contemplating) Ok.

STAY TUNED!

Chapter 6 starts Next Week! Crazy stuff coming up!

mysterious attraction poster

(*Although I’ve made my own edits in this post, I do not take credit for the images, and don’t worry one day

when I get a new computer and better programs, they will get better! lol.*)

Happy Weekend!

-<3-

Living Single?

There is a certain battle you face as a writer. When you have to decide if what you’ve written is ready to be shared or if  it’s better left unsaid; hidden in the quiet pages of a journal. You have to decipher if it’s too personal or just personal enough. I’ve always been a sheltered writer. Most of what you’ve seen on this blog has been hidden in carefully crafted poems or in sarcastically clad rants, or just some randomness about Justin Timberlake! But it’s been said that what makes a good writer is knowing how to be vulnerable and knowing that it’s ok to be. Writers write what they can’t say, what they’re afraid of, or what they’ve been trying to avoid. And although I keep to myself most of the time and I’m not one to share my personal business, I just felt like if I’m gonna tell a story…I might as well tell it right.

***To anyone who may be mentioned, I mean no offense whatsoever…just a girl giving her opinion…

and to all my girls, I love you!***

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Deep breathe ladies….you knew this day would come, yes that’s right I’m talking about the day…

Your best friend gets a boyfriend. (and that last . is more like the punctuation and sound of MTV’s AWKWARD.)

So let’s just get the whole romantic movie watching and junk food eating out of the way and get to what’s really on your mind.

THIS F*$KGHJ SUCKS!!!!

HaHa

No but it really does.

As HAPPY as you are for them, (And by happy I mean ecstatic! After all this is the thing you’ve spent most of your time talking about, gossiping over) you can’t help the part of you that’s a little bit jealous…like where’s my guy?… when is it going to be my turn? I am sure we’ve all been there.

For girls, a best friend is like your first soul mate

The sister you choose for yourself

And when someone else comes into the picture

You realize the inevitable factor that your relationship with your “bestie” is about to change forever

This transformation will happen in phases

First they will swear that nothing will change, but you know better

It’s only natural that they do

Then the “I’m sorry’s” will flood in

The ignoring your texts will start to happen…

and the “Oh I’d love to but I’m going to be with…” will soon come after

And Ladies again, this is only part of a natural progression

They have someone else in their lives, which they value too

But no matter how unintentional these acts are

They are there, they do exist

And all while you’re sitting home on a Friday night wondering where the hell your best friend went

They are often off with their boyfriends enjoying their night somewhere else

It’s a difficult transition and I don’t say this to offend anyone, if you know me personally, you know I’m not mean-spirited

But there are just some things in life that we have to face

And this unfortunately is one of them

Only thing is I’ve got it from both ends of the best friend spectrum

Not only is my best friend in the world in a relationship, but my other best friend is freakin’ engaged!

ENGAGED! (I’m super happy for her, and they are adorable!) But this was a girl who used to party with the best of them, and now I barely see her,  It’s strange…

When you realize that you’re closest contact to someone who used to basically live in your house is now whatever they happen to post on instagram as you’re scrolling through

She’ll always be one of my best friends, but things change…it’s just the way it goes

It doesn’t mean that it’s bad

But it also doesn’t make it hurt any less

I don’t know about you other 22 year old girls out there, but I’m not looking for a ring on my finger at this age, all I’m looking for is a guy who cares enough to want to get to know me

I’ve never actually had a guy respectfully want to get to know me

And maybe I’m just being naive about that

But there is more to human interaction than what most guys think

It’s most likely my fault as to why I’m still single

I tend to have the words FUCK OFF written across my forehead

And when I’m out with my girls, I’m just that…out with my girls

I’m not the girl who goes out with her friends to find a guy (although maybe I should start, New Year Res??? lol)

No I’m the girl who feels that if you come up to me in a bar and try to put your arm around me, I may not be responsible for kicking you in the shin…what can I say I’m allergic to asshole

I’m sorry I just don’t see what’s so bad about the “Hi, I’m so and so, what’s your name?” approach. Why does it have to be so complicated? Why do you need a gimmick? You don’t know me… so why are you touching me? (uh oh my feminism is showing, there’s more where that came from!)

Although, my friend Lauren will tell you that I’m a major bitch to guys when they try to hit on me. Which I find hysterical because I’m usually a pretty shy person. But 21st birthday… drunk … and over the idea that heels were a suitable shoe choice for the night = Bitchy Michelle.

I guess I’m just not used to the attention

I can be pretty oblivious to flirtation…like really oblivious…

My mom always says that I can’t be bothered with guys, that I have no time for them. She likes to think that so many guys have been interested in me and that I never seemed to notice. And I’m just like yea ok mom, thanks. (She’s my mom she has to say things like that)

But then again in the same breath, she’ll tell me, you need to put yourself out there more…um, been there, done that, no thanks.

Ok ok that’s not true…

But what’s so difficult about this whole best friend getting a boyfriend situation is the fact that above all else…your best friends are just slightly out of reach

And how do you tell your best friend, that they’ve been MIA, without hurting their feelings

That bond that you shared has to now factor in someone else

It’s our 20’s… isn’t this supposed to be the time of our lives?

the time where we’re supposed to be broke, and living on a dream…or a prayer? (if you’re a Bon Jovi fan) 😉

the time where finding yourself is the main focus of your life?

the time to be selfish about how you spend your time without having to feel like your tied to someone else?

Well if it isn’t it should be

And I’m not saying that if you’re in a relationship, that it’s a bad thing

Because it isn’t…in fact if you managed to find a guy in this mess…Kudos to you…(that also deserves a “You go girl” *snap*)

Both my best friends managed to catch some really great fish in the sea (of life)

(Yea I just went there. Sorry that was lame.)

I’m pretty positive that if I had an amazing boyfriend right now I would feel way differently about all this

but for right now, this is how it feels

And as a writer, we put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard)

and we try to make sense of what we are feeling and why we feel it

As a teenager I always felt like I was the child of the group

I was always less experienced, more sheltered

but somehow I also felt like the motherly figure; two opposite ends of the spectrum

(I warn you now, there is probably going to be A LOT of me contradicting myself in this…but yea that’s girls for ya. We laugh, we cry, sometimes both, we say things in code…Welcome to the real world)

I was always the one hosting something, or the one checking in on friends who fell on their asses, while others just laughed alongside (and I actually mean that literally!…I have clumsy friends, lol)

And for most of my life the world around me was always fast moving, but I somehow stayed still

And I felt like I never really got to experience the types of things normal teens experienced

I was never one to follow a crowd

partly because of the way I was raised

and partly because I do what I’m comfortable with

And in high school that lifestyle of drinking and partying wasn’t something I gravitated toward, and even in college I kind of just did my own thing…that is just who I am

And I would often wonder…am I missing something?

For someone who is so mature minded

Why are you scared to live?

I guess I never wanted to grow up too fast

And I didn’t-

While kids in JUNIOR high were sneaking around drinking beers

I was listening to *NSYNC and dancing around with my best friend in her basement like maniacs, (shit I still do that in my room, on occasion…shout out to my 90’s girls)

We never wanted to do something just because others were, we made our own path

But I always thought that one day it’ll be different…we’d conquer that “forbidden” world together

But things change…and so do people

And as I stayed in the same spot, my friends grew on without me

I thought that when we all got older and were in our 20’s it would be the most amazing time…and we’d get to live it all together

And to some extent I was right

Things are a lot easier now…

I don’t get that sickening feeling of ordering a drink knowing I don’t have an ID to back it up, anymore

There’s a certain ease about being 22

But I still feel like a kid

the only difference is I can drink alcohol now

This vision of going out with friends and living the single 20 something life is kind of dulling

2 years in (how sad is that?)

And that idea that it’d be me and my best friends against the world has been jaded

that vision I had is blurred

it’s still there

and it’s within reach

but it’s just missing a couple of faces

really important ones

Faces that I have had in my life for more than half my life, some for my entire life

and I know that the distance and the gap in time isn’t intentional

And if I said it out loud maybe they would understand

But as girls (really as people) we all try to find reasons for things

But sometimes change is inevitable

And sometimes it can be really good

It can force you to look within you

to stop depending on others and figure it out for yourself

And make you try new things

Think outside the box

But at times when you look around

Your going to feel like you’re drowning…and it’s going to seem like every one is in a relationship

And you’re over in the corner, hosting a singles party for 1

It’s happening in my group of friends now…friend after friend changing their relationship status’

And so as you stumble along in this happy, free, confused and lonely place (yea that was a t-swift reference, did you catch it?)

You will find that there is a light

A person out there who is a lot like you

and who just so happens to be throwing you into a boat and paddling to make it through

For me it’s my friend Stav

She and I are pretty similar

Freakishly similar actually

We always joke about how we’re twins

We think a lot alike, dress alike, and basically whenever we hangout out it’s like we just get where the other person is coming from

I think it’s safe to say she’s one of the few people, I really feel like understands where I’m coming from, at this point in my life

And she, just like me is still living the oh so single (and ready to mingle) life (Omg I did it again, you guys I just can’t help it, the corny is just too good to refuse)

Anyway, for all you still single girls out there…I challenge you to make the best of it… that’s what I vowed to do this year. I’m logging in some super fun girls night out ideas and we are gonna make some memories, and I am going to put some new faces in that vision of mine.

Girls Night Out??? Um yes please.

Girls Night Out??? Um yes please.

And ladies as cliché as it may sound…your prince is out there, he’s just not ready for you yet… (Or maybe he’s just a little lost). So keep your head up, your shoes flat and a relatively sober mind and go have a girls night (go have many girls nights) with your other single friends (I have some amazing ones) and who knows you might just find Mr. Right…or Mr. Right Now…hey we are only in our 20’s….if nothing else at least you’ll walk away with an asshole story to share with the group 😉

single-life-20

Hollllaaaaa

So ladies…that deep breathe you’ve been holding in all this time, let it out!

I can’t believe I made it through this entire thing, without one Beyonce reference…”all my single ladies, all my single ladies”…oh whoops there it is!

***Just to be clear both my best friends have been in serious relationships over a year, and I am just now writing this post, I’ve learned a lot and I just thought I’d share the wealth…also I am still friends with them, they will always be my best friends…it’s just the changes we go through in life. But being single isn’t a curse…and even though my best friends have significant others and some of my other really good friends have boyfriends, I still have the few girls that don’t and ladies, it’s our year! Let’s do this! :D***

livingsingle

Who knows the show living single? If you do we can be best friends…

-<3-

*I do not take any credit for any images…all belong to their rightful owners!*

Mysterious Attraction- Ch. 5 Part 2

Previously on Mysterious Attraction

RECAP

The next morning

Lexie wakes up to a sleeping Carter next to her, and she smiles happily

She checks the time and realizes she has to be in work soon Brooke-and-Julian-7x20-Learning-To-Fall-brooke-and-julian-14827428-1280-720Ryan-Gosling-and-Emma-Stone-in-Crazy-Stupid-Love

Carter: (waking up) Hey you.

Lexie: Hi.

Carter: Where are you going?

Lexie: I have to get to work.

Carter: Oh right. I forgot there’s actually a whole other world out there.

Lexie: Yea. Well it was nice living in a bubble with you, (kisses him) But the real world tumblr_l1lpgiITL61qanm15o1_500beckons. (gets out of bed)

Carter: Hey Lexie?

Lexie: Yea?

Carter: We’re gonna do this. You and me. I promise I’m gonna find a way.

Lexie: What did you mean last night when you said, that Kelly was no longer a valid question?

Carter: I meant that I’ve made my choice.

Lexie: Carter-

Carter: Don’t fight me on this.

Lexie: Carter there’s something I need to tell you…

Carter: Is this about Joe, because I think that last night was enough information for me to process for the time being.

Lexie: Hey!…I told you I have a lot of skeletons, if you can’t handle the Joe situation, you better rethink your choice, because there’s a lot more where that drama came from.

Carter: I was just kidding. Everyone has their pasts, things they’ve done that they’re not proud of, things  that have broken their heart, things they’re afraid of, things that they wish could be different. And hey I’m no stranger to any of that, I’m not perfect. We’re all human. So whatever demons you’re fighting, I’d like to come along for the ride.

Lexie: Oh yea, you think you’re up to the challenge, (smirks and crosses her arms).

Carter: Well, yea… I mean that’s exactly how I’d describe you…a challenge.gs_ryan_gosling_crazy_stupid_love_6

Lexie: Hey…(playfully hits him in the chest)

Carter: (laughs) We both know I like a challenge.

Lexie: Oh really…and is that all I am to you? (she fakes seriousness)

Carter: I was just kidding, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings-

Lexie starts laughing and kisses him

Carter: You mean so much more to me, you know that right?

Lexie: I do, and I think I’m finally learning to trust that.

Carter: Whoa…that’s progress.

Lexie smiles

Carter: So what was it that you had to tell me?

Lexie: It’s not exactly involving any of my skeletons, it’s kind of one of yours. It’s about you. And your family.

Carter: Ok?

Lexie: What I’m about to tell you is going to come as a shock, but I want you to know that considering the source, it may not be completely true. But I figured either way, we should figure it out together.  I don’t wanna keep more secrets from you.

Carter: Ok well thank you, I appreciate that. So what’s going on?

Lexie: My father has said that he has reason to believe that you are… Skully’s biological son.

Carter: ….What?… That’s impossible.

Lexie: I don’t know for sure that it is.  (hands him a birth certificate.)

Carter: What is this?

Lexie: That’s a copy of your original birth certificate, look at the name for the father…

Carter: This can’t be real?

Lexie: Look my father is a man of many things, but a forger isn’t one of his talents, this seems pretty legit.

Carter: I can’t believe this… I’ve never seen this…Skully’s my father?

Lexie: I’m afraid it’s a possibility.

Carter: But my mother’s signature is here, I don’t understand.

Lexie: Carter I have a theory. I don’t want to make assumptions but I’ve been in this business long enough, and I’ve seen this type of thing happen quite often.

Carter: Meaning what?

Lexie: It’s obvious that your mother may have kept this from you to protect you. She knew your father was a dangerous man with a lot of enemies, so she let another man step in and take his place. That’s why the birth certificate that you have states that John and Joan are your parents. Joan is your mother, but John was just the man who stepped up, gave you a dad. This original birth certificate states that Skully is your father, but there’s no signature. My guess is your mother initially put Skully’s name down, but then once the drugs of childbirth wore off, she probably realized she didn’t want her son being raised into the mob.

Carter: So then who the hell is John? And why would he pretend to be my dad?

Lexie: I don’t know all the facts. That’s as far as I dug. I didn’t want to keep on, without you knowing. But maybe he’s an old friend, or maybe an uncle, Skully does come from a big family. A lot of them want nothing to do with him, because of the life he’s chose to lead. So I mean when you put all the pieces together, I think it’s unfortunate that my father was actually telling me the truth. As crazy as it may seem.

Carter: This is just…this is insane. Wait a minute… is this why you’ve been so hot and cold with me, lately?

Lexie: (laughs) I’m always hot and cold with you.

Carter: Yea, but this was more than usual. That day in your office when you kept insinuating that I was working for Skully, this is what you meant…You thought I knew he was my father all along, that I was trying to use you?

Lexie: I didn’t at first, but of course my father put the idea in my head and I just thought it could have been possible. I mean you did kind of come out of nowhere. I just assumed it was intentional.

Carter: Oh it was. But not by me, or by some cryptic plan to use you to help my mob boss of a father. But it was intentional on some other cosmic level. I think that we were meant to meet. And I think you were meant for me.

Lexie: (smiles) I like that. That’s a nice way to look at things.

Carter: I’m sorry that your father ever questioned us. And I’m sorry that I ever gave you any reason to question me.

Lexie: Don’t be, I should have known better. I may not know everything there is to know about you. And you definitely don’t know all you should know about me, which is my own fault and I promise to work on that. But I do know your eyes, and I know your smile, and I know how it feels to be with you. How I feel like a better version of the girl I wanna be. So yea, I think we’re gonna be ok. (kisses him)312913_1255639634297_full

Carter: I don’t think I’ve ever heard you refer to us as a we. I like it. (smiles)

Lexie:(smiles) Look, I realize this whole Skully thing is a lot to take in, but trust me you don’t have to have anything to do with him…ever. We can even pretend that you never found out.

Carter: I highly doubt that, this isn’t the type of thing you forget. I mean I’m the offspring of a ruthless killer.

Lexie: Welcome to the Club.

Carter: Ugh, I can’t believe I just said that, Lexie, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to-

Lexie: It’s ok. (Smiles)

Carter: Thank you, for being honest with me. It feels like these days, no one ever is.

Lexie: Should I not have told you? I feel like I just ruined your life, I mean were you better off not knowing?

Carter: No. No I’d like to know if my family could ever be at stake and knowing this just makes me more prepared, if anything ever comes of it.

Lexie: If you ask me, I’m pretty sure that Skully is still as clueless as you were, it looks like your mom covered her tracks. It took a lot of illegal favors to pull up that original birth certificate.

Carter: Well let’s hope Skully never finds out.

Lexie: He won’t, not if I have anything to do with it.

Carter: I love you, you know that?ryan-gosling-320

Lexie smiles

145949_1326385547996_fullCarter: What?

Lexie: I don’t know if I’m ever going to get used to hearing you say that.

Carter: Well expect it a lot more.

Lexie: (smiles) Where did you come from?

Carter: Well I was born and raised in Brooklyn…

Lexie: (laughs) You know what I mean…312913_1255639634297_full

Carter: Do I? (smirks, cupping her face in his hands)

Lexie: In all this fear and hate and in a world that revolves around danger, you walk in, and for some strange reason, I believe that there’s more out there, not just for me, but for us. How crazy is it, that we may actually one day be able to be a normal couple?

Carter: That day can’t come soon enough (kisses her).

Lexie: Carter…what are you going to tell Kelly?

Carter: The truth…that while she wasn’t looking, I’ve fallen in love with someone else. Someone who I can’t get out of my mind, and who I can’t even fathom living without.

Lexie: I’d leave those last few lines out…unless you want a hairdryer flung at your head, (smiles).

Carter: Don’t worry, this all ends tonight. I love you and I can’t wait to be with you.

Lexie: Me too.

Carter kisses her goodbye.

Carter: Bye gorgeous, I’ll miss you.

Lexie: Miss you more (kisses her)

614-00775

-He exits-

Lexie dances happily like a little girl

STAY TUNED!!!

Next week…

Chapter 5 rounds out as…

Carter finally faces Kelly.

And will Lexie finally face her father?

**I do not take any credit for any images or gifs used, all belong to their rightful owners/creators!**

Happy Weekend!

-<3-

Dear Opposite Sex, Made your resolution?… Check it twice

So with the New Year rolling in everyone seems to be making their resolutions, so guys out there is cyberspace why not look to improve your “courting” skills…because based on this generation’s definition of dating, you need some serious help! 😉

5 Things Girls Wish Guys Still Did…

1.) Open doors

man-opening-door-for-lady-tm

I know it’s the oldest gentlemen act in the book, but it’s still something that I think should be a part of at least “the courting stages”…but then again I don’t think courting should be a stage. I think all the things you do when you’re trying to win over a girl, should be all the things you still do while you’re trying to keep her!

2.) Compliment her

compliment

I don’t mean it has to be every second of everyday… but if you’re going out together and you realize she’s all dressed up…understand some work went into getting ready, and just shoot her a little “you look nice.” It’s not that hard, and it’ll make her night!

3.) Pull out her chair

man-pulling-chair-for-girl

I NEVER see this anymore and I think that’s so sad. It’s just a cute little gesture that says I’ve got this for you, I can take care of you.

4.) Flowers for no reason

flower+delivery

It’s just something that says, Hey it doesn’t have to be Valentine’s Day or our Anniversary for me to want to tell you that I love you, or that I value having you in my life.

5.) Take the curbside of the sidewalk

a-man-walks-on-the-curb-242x300

THIS ONE, IS MY FAVORITE!

I don’t know why but I’ve always found this to be the ultimate act of a gentlemen. It’s basically saying you’re safe with me.

**But just to be clear…these are NOT deal breakers…if your guy does one or two of these on occasion, consider yourself lucky. And if he doesn’t do any, it doesn’t matter as long as he treats you right. The feminist side of me says well, I can take care of myself, but the romantic side of me realizes the truth is, it’s all in the attempt. If a guy attempts to do these things for you, it’s sweet and a girl will appreciate it. And if she doesn’t well then, I guess your off the hook! haha.**

Happy Resolution Keeping Folks!

-I do not take any credit for any images used!-

-<3-